Wonderland // McFly

Day by Day

December 7, 2014

I had devised a plan. 

For a while now, I've been working on selling my house and tonight after rehearsal my real estate agent Cynthia was helping me do a showing. 

I planned that today, at the very end of rehearsal, I would tell just Tom and Harry I was quitting my job and moving to America. Then tomorrow I would tell just Matt and James, and the next day I would tell Danny and Dougie. 

There was a science behind this. 

I was least nervous to tell Matt and James since I found them to be wiser, and also I hadn't literally spent everyday for the past ten years with them, so I would put them in between the day I told the McFly boys, just so that my heart didn't, you know, explode. 

Harry was fury-filled and Tom was rational, so my hopes would be that telling them together would balance the effects out. 

That, or they would actually combust. 

I was most nervous to tell Danny and Dougie. Danny because he was emotional and Dougie because...well because he was Dougie. So naturally, I procrastinated. 

Just as the boys were packing up, I casually said:

"Oh and uh...Tom? Harry? I need to talk to you two quickly before you leave." My voice was definitely shaking, but they didn't seem to notice. Typical. 

"Uh oh! They're in trouble!" Dougie said, in a sing-song tone. 

"Sod off." Harry joked, laughing. The other four packed up their things rather slowly (I mean, probably not actually, but it sure felt that way) and made their way out. Tom and Harry finished packing their things and then walked up to me. The empty studio suddenly felt very big, and I felt very small. 

"What's up, Lil?" Tom asks casually. Harry and him were standing beside each other in front of me. 

"Okay." I say, taking a breath. "I'm gonna tell you something and I need you to not tell any of the other guys because...it's something I need to do...and I'm gonna do it in the next few days." 

"You're worrying me." Harry says, laughing nervously. 

"I'm quitting." I blurt out. 

There's silence. 

Oh God, I bet they're mad. 

They look at each other. 

Or what if they actually don't care? What if I'm making this huge deal and they don't even care I'm going to America? 

They look back at me. 

"Quitting what?" Tom asks. They're both smiling. 

"My job." I say. "I'm quitting my job." 

Their smiles fade. 

"I'm sorry-" Harry says. I can already hear the anger in his voice. "What?" 

"Tom help me." I say quietly. 

"No, I'm with Harry on this one." He says. Oh no. He's mad too. I've made an awful mistake. 

"Oh, what? Do you just have a job with another boy band lined up?" Harry yells. "Who is it? One Direction? Just because we're taking a different route then planned-" 

"I'm moving to America." I say quickly, and they go silent again. 

"Why?" Tom asks, also yelling. "That is like...the worst idea I've ever heard! You're going to start your life over in America? Find a house, find a job-"