イタズラな KISS ~3 ✔

Irie Yuki - 1.4

Irie Yuki 4: Dreams that's Where I Have to Go

--

I can't even be loyal to my thoughts while having this fever. I looked at the ceiling, having a hard time breathing. My vision was much clouded... it seems like I am not in my right mind. I thought I was sucked down by a black hole and I was here in the other dimension. I indeed wanted to see Konomi for myself. I don't want... I don't want... I don't want to keep thinking about her like this... I can't do anything. I'm stuck. I'm frozen. I'm such an idiot. I always let my brain think... I heard my heart beating and I still act like I am not hurt. I won't fall from being this weak if I made the right choice.

If I could only say I love you, would she be here and stay with me?

But that's impossible... that guy named Tirigaki must have reached her heart. Why do I let him do things as his way? He doesn't know anything. He doesn't know how hard I put up with myself trying to show to the world that I treasure her. I know the problem is in me but... I wish he'd understand. I wish he'd known. Like what Ni-chan said before. She's the only thing that I could think of. She's for me and I need her for myself. I want to be more selfish but I just can't get over, and I'm lying here on this bed, being sick like this.

But somehow... I felt like Konomi was touching my head not a while ago. Or maybe was it my imagination. Keredo, if this is part of my imagination, I wanted to say how I love her. I don't want to be too late but I want to raise my hopes up and not waste any second. I swear, after I got better, I want to go to her and take it back what I have said. Ni-chan was right. There are times when you have to be more selfish... and I think this is the time now. I think that I got this fever because I've been acting weird and it makes me feel weak... because I let my guard down.

Maybe... I should let go of all of these thoughts. It's not good if I keep on thinking like this while having this fever. Soon if I get better, I will try again. I will do the things my heart wants me to. I don't want to have regrets. I did not do anything for her these past years and I want to start showing to her... to show to that guy that he's dead wrong.

.

.

.

.

.

"Yuki-kun. I'm sorry to keep you waiting. I am nervous about making these. I hope you'll eat this and make you feel better."

Konomi... I heard her lovely voice. Is it true that she's here? Konomi...

"Yuki-kun?" she called again.

"Yuki-kun, you must sit up and eat this. I've heard from Kotoko Onee-chan that you didn't eat anything for today. So, please... I'll help you eat this. I mean... err... I'll feed you. If you don't mind."

I open my eyes and saw her staring at me. I smiled for a bit. If this is a dream then this is where I have to go. A lot of things happened to us lately and I just want to feel calm even though I know this is not happening in reality. Maybe I should be glad that I am seeing Konomi in this high fever. My mind is in not in the right state but I see her completely with that worried eyes.

She put the tray on the desk when she remembered something, "I should check your temperature right now. Is it okay to be here? Your fever is not good. One look at you, Yuki-kun... it must be so hard for you to keep up in that state. But if it doesn't get better for a second, then I will take you to the hospital. Don't worry, it will be alright. I will call Mrs. Irie about your condition afterward. I hope you're going to be okay."