girl crush [ idols x idol!oc ]

girl crush [ seven ]

i told my members about the whole mini album thing, and they were happy for me. although it seems tiring, i know that once it was all produced and ready for the public the result will be satisfying. when we were inside ceo's office, i really accepted it and i was happy, but as we went inside the dorm, i started having doubts with myself. i started having doubts with my ability to carry both the weight of being in a girl group and pursuing a solo career.

yg ceo made it also clear to me that he wanted to make collaborations with other artists because apparently, he wanted us more exposure to the public. i still don't know who i wanna collaborate with, since i didn't have contact with big bang sunbaenims. let's face it, i'm a sucker for big bang. they inspired me to audition for yg after all.

we were inside our dorm, waiting for the dinner to get cooked. it was late, but really were dying to eat real food this time and aina unnie insisted to cook so we let her. even minsoo unnie tried to helpher but she said that it was alright so we just let her do what she wanted to do. the four of us were seated on the couch in front of the turned off television, waiting for jaemin to shut the hell up.

"to be honest, i really do think that sooji deserves this mini album because despite being the—" jaemin was about to speak, but minsoo sighed and then shut her up by covering her mouth.

i grinned as i watched them. minsoo was tired of jaemin's running mouth, and hanbyun looked pissed, that she wanted to throw her book at the older girl.

"dinner is ready, girls. dig in," said aina, so we went to the dining room to see that she has prepared teriyaki for us. there was even onigiri, and i knew that she really made this by heart. she loved it whenever we would eat japanese food with her, and of course we loved her response whenever we told her that japanese food was yummy.

we all walked towards the dining room, with jaemin protesting loudly how she was only voicing out her thoughts and minsoo didn't really have to shut her up harshly. hanbyun rolled her eyes while i just shook my head.

sitting down next to jaemin who was pouting, i started eating after saying my thanks for the food and for aina unnie who made it for us. everyone was eating happily, and they even chatted happily like we weren't tired at all.

after the dinner, the girls went straight to bed so i decided that i needed to do the same.

i locked my door behind me and then laid down on the bed. i wasn't smiling yet i wasn't frowning either, for some reason. i looked around my room, seeing my dark walls after i turned off the lights. there were posters there and frames of paintings, and even photographs.

whenever i feel bored here in my room and I couldn't sleep, i would just gaze at the numerous photographs and just reminisce the memories they held. they bring calming smiles to my lips to the point that i can't even fight back the urge to sleep anymore. there were quite a few, but some hold more special places in my heart.

the first one was of me with the ceo, smiling brightly after he announced to me that i will be a member of his mew girl group. that moment was precious for me because that was when i realized that even someone like me can chase her dreams, if she only believed she could. yg ceo also believed in me, so i wanted to believe in myself too.

the next was of me and the azes members, before we even debuted. it was when we were training all day, nonstop, for a successful debut. i remember that day clearly because that was when i got my snake onesie.

next was of my family, when i was younger. it made me smile because it reminded me of how simple life was back then, and how supportive they were of my dream. i really feel like i won't be here if they never supported me.

next was sanha and i, having cute smiles across our faces like we were innocent kids while we were actual evil maknaes of our groups. he had a beret on and a striped shirt while i also had a beret but with a patterned shirt.

next was felix and i, and he was carrying me bridal style. he looked like he was going to drop me, and i had a surprised and scared look across my face. it was the day we first met unexpectedly.

vernon and i's picture was next, with him smiling at the camera and we looking weirdly at him. he looked cool, and i actually thought he looked like a korean version of leonardo dicaprio.

and then there's dahyun and i, with me carrying her on my back while i was on my skateboard. she was grinning and i was, too, but we slipped the moment after the picture was taken.

the next was of me and azes, the day we debuted. we were all happy because we finally were a step away from achieving our dreams, and we were gonna achieve it together. no one will be left.

i bit my lip and fought back tears. maybe it was the wrong decision to take the mini album proposal? i mean, we dreamt to soar high together, azes of the nation, but here i am getting a lot more opportunities than them.

was it the right decision to take it? i remember their faces once i told them about it. they looked kind of sad but they tried to look happy. maybe because i was the only one who got a mini album before everyone else.

i sighed and then stood up to look at the thing inside my closet. i know it's late at night, but i needed to freshen up my mind.

and so i took my board, opened my window and then sneaked out of the dorm.