My Saviour - Tanner X Woods

Chapter 26 - Living Nightmare

*TRIGGER WARNING*

-Self harm.

Woods' POV

When Paul and I arrived home, I headed straight to bed. I didn't want to be awake with all these thoughts racing around my mind.

Tanner slowly entered and saw me. I was in my bath tub filled with my own blood. I thought he would cry and be upset but instead he was angry. "Why the fuck did you do this? You idiot. Too weak to live huh? Pathetic." He huffed.

I could hear everything he was saying, yet I was seemingly dead. Tanner left for a few moments before coming back. "I'm going to take you to the hospital because this looks so dodgy.

I arrived at the hospital and I saw Tanner fake crying to the nurses. "I just love him so much and I can't live without him, please save him. Please."

He bent over my bed and whispered into my ear. "It's all a lie. I don't love you. Why would anyone love you, all you do is destroy lives. You deserved this. My mum then rushed into the room. She had the same look as Tanner when he found me. She was angry. All the nurses had left and I was just laying on the bed with wires and tubes covering my body.

"How did you even love this Tanner? He's a mess. A pathetic mess." She hissed.

"I didn't ever love him. Why would I? I saw how weak he was and he was so easy to use." My mother smiled at his comments.

"Yes, he was so easy to use. He was so ridiculous. He deserves this. Nobody cares about him anyway so we won't be missing anything."

"Do you want to get drinks tonight?" Tanner asked smiling.

"Yeah sure, let's party. We are finally rid of this waste of space." My mother grinned.

They were happy I did this to myself. Nobody ever cared. When the nurse entered again, Tanner and my mum began to fake cry again.

"How could I not see this? I love my baby boy so much." She weeped into Tanner's shoulder. I saw Tanner trying not to laugh. She kicked him slightly so he stopped.

"NO NO NO" I woke up screaming and unable to breathe. I heard Paul racing up the stairs. He burst in.

"What's happened?!" He said as he ran over to me. I felt beads of sweat rolling down my head. Paul held me in his arms. "It's alright. You're safe."

I was shaking really violently and sobbing.

"What was it Woods?" Paul said still holding my shaking body. I didn't want to say. It was so messed up and I couldn't manage the thoughts of it never mind speaking about it. Talking about stuff always made it real. I didn't want to make it real. I wanted the dream to be a dream and let it pass by with no further thought, but I knew this would stay with me.

"I really don't want to say. I just need to move on." I said trying not to break down into tears again.

Paul nodded. "Why don't we go out for breakfast. We can go where ever you like and I will pay for you." He said smiling. I saw the fear in his eyes. I nodded and began to get ready. Paul left me for a little bit and he got ready too.

I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and instead of quickly looking away from it, I walked over to it and stared at the creature looking back at me. It was awful. "That dream was real. They hate you. They all lie to you. You deserve to be dead. What they said was true. You destroy lives. You destroy happiness. You don't deserve to live." I felt myself tearing up as I said this. I was screaming it in my head and whispering it out loud.