My Saviour - Tanner X Woods

Chapter 7 - Missed Opportunities

I woke up to loads of missed calls and messages from Matt. I completely forgot about work as my mind was focused on Woods. It was meant to be his first day today.

I texted Matt to see if he could come over when he was done at the office. While I waited for a reply I rolled over to see Woods was still asleep. I quietly got up and out of bed and crept out the room. I headed downstairs. My phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out and it was Matt. He said he was going to drop by anyway.

I headed to the kitchen and got put some food for tea. I wasn't sure whether Woods would want anything to eat but I made some food for him and if he didn't want it then I could put in the fridge for another time if he wanted it.

As I began to wash the dishes, I felt two arms wrap around my waist and a warm mass get closer to my body. I turned a little to see Woods clinging on to me like a little koala bear. I poked his nose and he giggled a little before moving to the side.

"Did you sleep Well?" I asked
"Yeah I did actually" he smiled.
"Good. So I made you something to eat, I wasn't sure whether you would want to eat it now or not. It's in the fridge and I can heat it up if you want it." I dried my hand on the nearest towel and headed to the fridge. I pulled the plate out and showed him it. "Aw. Tanner thankyou. I will have it in a bit. I'm not really hungry at the moment. Sorry" He lowered his head a little looking nervous. "No no it's okay. I can sort it whenever you want it." I patted him on the back and went to the sofa. He followed closy behind.

"So do you want to watch a movie?" Woods asked.
"Well, I mean yeah sure. But.. Matt is coming over at some point so we might have to pause it." Woods looked over at me panicked.
"No No no no no. It was meant to be my first day today... I was meant to be there. I've blown it. He hates me. He can't rely on me to even be there on my first day. He will fire me straight away." His breathing became thin and rushed. He began to shake and tears filled his eyes.

"Woods. Hey. It's Okay, Matt is a really understanding guy. You don't have to tell him everything if you don't want to but just explain you had a really difficult night. I was meant to go to work today as well. I'm just going to say that I was here to support you. Unless you want me to say something else." I hugged him close to me and kissed his forehead.

"Are you sure? I've really messed things up for you. I didn't mean to do this. I'm sorry." Woods broke down into tears. His tears cascading down his cheeks and forming pools on my shirt. I took the corner of my shirt and dried his eyes. I held his face in my hands. "It's okay Woods. We can get through this. It will be very difficult at times but I promise I will try my absolute hardest to help get you better." I assured him.

I saw a tiny bit of hope flicker in his eyes. "You really mean that?"
"Every single word" I smiled. He closed his eyes and lowered his head a little. "Right come on. Let's get this movie started. What do you want to watch?" Woods got up slowly and walked to the cabinet that held all of the movies and CDs. He picked one and put it into the drive. He turned on the TV and I grabbed the blankets. He sat down next to me. I laid sidewards on the sofa and he laid just in front of me. I held him close to me and pulled the blankets over us.

After about an hour, I looked down at Woods and he was fast asleep in my arms. He was so pure and innocent. It seemed so unbelievable he had such horrible thoughts. But it was the harsh reality of life. I had never really experienced anything as bad as what Woods has been going through, but I have had my struggles with my self esteem. I never talked to anybody about them though. I didn't want to bother anybody with it.

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I heard a knock at the door. I slowly sat up behind Woods and tried to climb over him as best as I could without disturbing him. I grabbed the keys from the basket by the door and rattled them in the lock. I opened the door to reveal Matt standing in the pouring rain.

"Hey come in." I gestured into my living room. "Sorry about the mess. I've not really had time to clean." We sat down on the other sofa and Matt had a quick scan of the room.
"It's okay. This is clean." Matt chuckled. I saw his gaze settle onto Woods. "Is everything Alright? You both look a bit rough."
"Well. Woods had a really difficult night last night. I'm going to be honest. I completely forgot about work and he wasn't exactly in a fit state to be thinking about it either."
"Can I ask what happened?"
"I'm going to wake up Woods. It's not my place to say and i dont want to make him think he can't trust me. It's nothing against you but I just..."
"It's okay I understand."

I walked over to Woods and crouched down in front of him. I nudged him a bit and his eyes slowly flickered open. He stretched his arms and legs out and then relaxed again. "When did I fall asleep?"
"A few hours ago." I laughed.
"Oh, sorry."
"It's okay. Matt is here." His glance suddenly bolted to the other sofa.
"Hey Woods." Matt gave a sympathetic smile and leant forward pressing his elbows against his knees. "How are you?"
"Oh me. Erm.. I'm fine thanks. You?" He manahed to stutter out. He gave me a concerned glance before looked back at Matt.
"Oh I'm good thanks." He smiled. "So is everything alright. Honestly? You don't have to tell me everything. I was just worried when you and Tanner didn't turn up. I know that something is wrong if Tanner doesn't come in."

Woods gave me another look. I went and sat next to him to reassure him I was there if he needed me.

"Well, for the past six years I have struggled with depression and anxiety. Wow.... that felt weird to say out loud. Sorry. Anyways. I often have times where I feel so alone and I just need somebody to be there. But when somebody is there, I'm terrified to death that I'm going to hurt them because I'm toxic and disgusting. So when I met Tanner he was a breath of fresh air for me. I felt free. I felt happy. But I knew I would only end up hurting him if I stayed around. So, last night I tried to get away. I can't remember what happened exactly. But I got really drunk and at some point I ended up getting back here. I have been sleeping all day. I'm really really sorry. I've let you down. This was meant to be my first day and I've just messed everything up." His voice began to break and crack. His eyes became red and teary again.

"I can't say I know how it feels and that I understand because I would be lying. All I can say is that tomorrow is a new day. A fresh start. Move on from the past and look to the future. You have a new job. We can forget about today. Pretend it never happened if you want to. But when you wake up tomorrow remember that it's a new day and you can start again. You will meet loads of really great people who would be so willing to help you out. Tanner is a good guy. I'm sure you have learnt that by now. I don't need to know the ins and outs of your friendships and relationships but I can tell you that you will definitely make new friends. And good ones at that who would be more than happy to help. Alright? And dont think that you can't talk to me. If you want a break at work then you can come and sit in my office and we can just chill or we can talk if you want. I want everybody to be happy and if they aren't then I will try my hardest to make sure they are. If you have any problems just come and see me. I don't mind at all."

Woods looked so relieved. His previously pastey white face had now filled with colour again.

"Thankyou very much." He smiled.
"You're more than welcome" Matt replied. "Right I had better get home to Amanda and Luna. See you tomorrow." He said as he stood up. I stood up too and winked at Woods. A small smile formed on his lips. I opened the door for Matt and walked him to his car. "He's a good lad. Take care of him Tanner." Matt said with slightly threatening voice.

"Oh I will. I definitely will."