sonder

dépaysement

Chapter Five

Dépaysement

(n.) when someone is taken out of their own familiar world into a new one

~ ~ ~

My mom used to love singing when I was little. She constantly was performing, always carrying a tune no matter where we were. Watching her cook was probably the best though, she'd glide through the kitchen with ease, humming and dancing as the radio played.

She was always the type of person who didn't need to know the lyrics to a song, she made up her own as she went and usually, she sounded so much better than the actual artist.

The radio still sits on the kitchen counter, pushed a little too the side, not forgotten and not completely lost, just neglected. When my dad left, the only times I ever heard my mom singing was when she'd sing Austin and Courtney to sleep. The two quickly grew out of that stage though, Austin took up listening to his own music instead and Courtney prefers to read a story before bed now.

My mom stopped smiling the way she used too when she stopped singing. Her eyes became circled with darkness from long shifts and her hands aged with time as well. Exhaustion took over her movements but I knew that somewhere within her, she was still the mom that I remember. She, like the radio, was just pushed to the side, not forgotten and not completely lost, just neglected.

~ ~ ~

"We need to go grocery shopping, we're out of milk." Austin states, holding up the empty jug as if to prove his point to both my mom and I. My mom looks up from her book, a small sigh escaping her mouth, barely audible but I catch it.

Today happened to be an odd day for our house, both my mom and I were off during the day meaning that we usually stuck around the house. Typically, we'd spend these says playing boardgames or watching movies, mostly just spending time as a family. It was a way for all of us to forget our usual routine and just be a family before returning to regular programming. Even though it was an odd day though, regular programming started back up in a few hours when my mom left for work again.

My mom's eyes turn to me with a pleading look in them. I knew that she was exhausted from her overnight shift and I knew that she had to work again tonight, so I stood up. "I'll take Austin and Courtney to the store, you go get some rest." I say, my mom mouthing thank you to me.

"Why do I have to go?" Austin complained; although, he was already headed for the door as I helped Courtney get ready.

"Because I never get to see you." I tell him, ruffling his hair, something that he had only just begun to hate. His hands instantly matted his hair back down; however, to no avail as his curls sprung back into whatever position they wanted to be in.

"I love you guys!" My mom calls out from where she has started to clean up the kitchen before she has to start getting ready for work.

"Love you, mom." Courtney replies with excitement, Austin mumbling in unison.

"I'll see you when we get back." I holler into the house, grabbing the car keys on my way out. I shuffle both my brother and sister into the car, Courtney buckled up in the backseat and Austin sitting next to me in the passenger's seat as I peel out of the driveway.

~ ~ ~

Milk, eggs, fruit, cereal, vegetables, bread, etc, etc, etc...

Grocery lists had become second nature to me. I knew every aisle, every product we needed, and how much everything costed. It was key when it came to making sure that the family stayed afloat in terms of money. Absolutely everything made a difference to our livelihood.

"Okay, you both can pick one cereal of your choice, got it?" I firmly ask my siblings, watching them both nod before walking excitedly ahead of my cart. They acted as if they didn't get to see the cereal right this second, then it would all dissipate. I begun mentally going over my list in my head for a third time, obviously not paying attention to where I was going as my cart slammed right into another cart, the sound of clashing metal echoing around us.

"I'm so sorry." I apologize, looking up to realize that I'd recognize those long sleeves anywhere.

"We missed you at the bookstore today." Damian replies, completely changing the topic from the fact that we just crashed into each other. "I see you spend your days off recklessly driving carts though."

"Funny." I snort. "What are you doing here?" I ask, glancing over his shoulder to see Austin and Courtney still scanning the many cereal options.

"My dad texted me on my way home from the bookstore, he wanted me to pick a few things up." He replies. "I'm assuming you're doing the same?" He then asks, peering into my very full cart.

"More than a few, but yes." I laugh. Courtney then comes running back to the cart, rushing past Damian in a hurry. Austin walks behind her, his energy from early now having left his system since he had picked what he wanted.

Courtney slams her box of cereal on top of all the other groceries before coming to my side and staring up at Damian's tall figure with curiosity. Austin's box is placed gently into the cart as well until two pairs of ogling eyes stare across at the seventeen year old mysterious boy in front of us all.

"Damian, these are my siblings, Austin and Courtney." I introduce, realizing that my two worlds are colliding right at this very second. "Damian's a friend of mine from work."

"Hi there." Damian greets, slightly waving his sweater clad arm, clasping the end of his sleeve back over his hand once he's placed it back by his side.

"Do you like ice cream?" Courtney questions, suspicion in her eyes as she awaits Damian's answer.

"It's only my favourite thing in the world." Damian replies, instantly charming Courtney as anyone who liked ice cream was good in Courtney's book.

"What about drawing?" She further interrogates. Damian nods with enthusiasm, a smile that I'd never seen before gracing his face. She then flickers her eyes up at me before addressing me with complete seriousness in her voice. "Kali, can he come over for dinner?" She asks me.

I glance up at Damian, only to notice that his face is still masked with that mesmerizing smile. I then look over at Austin who has completely disengaged from the conversation. And finally, I look back down into my little sister's big brown eyes.

"Why don't you ask Damian if he'd like to." I suggest, something that I never thought I would say in my lifetime.

"Damian," Courtney begins, her voice as sweet as ever. "want to come over for dinner? We have ice cream." She finishes, adding the ice cream on as a selling feature.

Damian makes eye contact with me as he nods, looking back to Courtney as he says that he'd love to. The two of us exchange phone numbers and I tell him that I'll text him when to come over.

We then go our separate ways; however, this time, our two worlds would truly be colliding, something that I was a little scared of now.

~*~*~*~*