Blue Roses

chapter thirty four

Chapter song~ addicted by Kelly Clarkson

The boys take me home, we walk in silence. Ash carries me even after my persistence of the fact that I could walk just fine. We get to my apartment and he finally sets my down so I can unlock the door. I sway a little and he raises an eyebrow but dosent move to pick me up again, which I'm grateful and disappointed about at the same time. I push open the door and shuffle my way inside leaving it open for them if they wanted to come in.

I hear the door close and I look over my shoulder, only Mark came inside, Im guessing Ash went home. I don't know whether to be sad or not about it. I go into the bathroom, grabbing a change of clothes on my way. I shower and get dressed taking my time because I know Mark isn't going anywhere.

After towel drying my hair letting it hang down my back in damp waves, I open the door and go into the kitchen for some water, one of the few things I can eat or drink without getting sick. I can feel his familiar gaze on me as I move around the apartment.

He clears his throat softly and I know what's coming. I don't want to hear it, but I know I don't have a choice so I sigh, and walk over sitting next to him. I put my head on his shoulder and he takes my hand just like old times. It almost feels normal, almost.

I open my mouth and everything just comes pouring out. Everything good, bad, anything that happened while he was gone. Even how much I had missed him afte the left. I don't stop until I finish the story about my nightmare dream land explaining how I saw my grandpa as the vampire that changed me. My eyes burn with unshed tears that I refuse to let fall. I sniff and he untangles his hand from mine placing it under my chin turning my face to look at him.

"Hey, don't cry, it'll be okay, we'll get through this, please don't cry."

I squeeze my eyes shut to try to disperse the tears but one rebellious drop escapes and slides hot down my cold cheek. He catches it with his finger tip, then wraps me in a tight bear hug like we were little again.

"We'll deal with everything later, you just need to get some rest. Go to bed, and we'll talk about it tomorrow when you get back from school, okay?"

I nod and he picks me up bridal style, holding my weight in one arm while pushing the blankets back with the other. He tucks me in like a child,

"Whats with everyone doing that today, I could have done that myself."

I say with my eyes half closed but voice still laced with stubbornness.

He chuckles, "I know, but you've had a rough day, and I see you haven't lost that thick headed stubbornness from your father hmm?"

I laugh softly eyes closing, "Nope, never have never will."

I don't hear him respond as I sink once again into the dark oblivion of sleep.

The next morning, Mark is asleep on the couch when I wake up. I tiptoe around, hoping not to wake him. I pull on a gray tank top and a short black skirt, putting fishnets under it. I throw on a black sweater to avoid dress code violation, yes even in a supernatural highschool we have dress code, and I zip up my boots. I quickly brush my teeth and run a comb through my long hair, with each strand I brush through it just springs back up into its natural curl. I put on a little foundation just to cover the dark circles under my eyes and the creamy ivory of my skin.

I pick up my bag and silently head out the door locking it behind me. I sigh at the bright morning sun and start walking to school. It's going to be a long day....

It feels like all the life has been drained out of my body. As I walk into first period, I can feel his gaze set on me like a punch to the stomach, it knocks all the air out of me. It feels like im suffocating in my own skin. I keep my head down as it burns holes in my back as I make my way to my seat. Its only been a day since his confession, both good and bad ones, but I feel like I can't breath around him, it isnt safe anymore. If I look at him, I'll either kiss him, or kill him, I wish I could do both right now, but thats a stupid idea.

I just have to go through the day, it's Friday, then I'll have the weekend to think everything over.

Just ignore him I tell myself, but my better half debates, easier said than done. To make matters worse, I can feel him watching me as I take my time getting my pencil, notebook, and textbook waiting on the bell and teacher. I hold my breath as out of the corner of my eye, I see him stand, start to walk in my direction, but the bell rings and the teacher walks in telling him to have a seat. Saved by the bell.

The rest of my day is full of avoiding and narrowly escaping having to have a conversation or make eye contact. I can almost feel the hurt and frustration radiating off him as I walk by him yet again into eigth period. If only he understood its not that I want to ignore him, its just something I have to do to protect myself, protect him, eventually he'll have to realize that being around me is a very, very bad idea. Where ever I go darkness and danger follows, without fail, and I don't want him getting hurt.
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I want to thank everyone who reads this book and sticks with me even though I'm inconsistent about updates, sorry about that I'm working on it, anyways thanks guys, stay cool ✌