Stay With Me {KTH FF}

Prologue

Life isn't always what we want it to be. Sometimes, things don't go the way we planned. And sometimes, that's okay. 

We don't have a choice anyway. Well, not in the end. If we make the wrong choices along the way, things don't usually end the way we think they will.

Life all about choices, when you think about it.

~🌺~

My name is Shae.

 I have 3 daughters, one who's grown and moved out, and two teens. 

I'm also a widow. It's fine, I'm fine. 

It's been a year.

My husband wasn't exactly the perfect man anyway. I loved him, but his choices affected our family enough, so that when he finally decided to change, it was too late to fix some things. I didn't wish to be a widow, but I knew that his choices would cause it sooner rather then later. I was prepared, in a way.

I'm alone now, and I don't need a man, or want a man. I am perfectly happy alone.

It gets lonely sometimes, I can't deny that, but my daughters keep me going, and show me every day that there is a reason to smile.

Without them, well, who knows what I would be doing.

Working, of course, but aside from that, my days would be less than exciting, that's for sure.

I wasn't unhappy, like I said, I was prepared for my life to take this turn.

I knew as well as I knew my own name that if my husband continued to choose the habits that were causing his health to worsen, that he was shortening it by the minute.

No one listens to me though, least of all, him.

As odd as it may sound, I have my happiness. It comes in the form of 7 extraordinary men who, without even really doing anything except being themselves, can bring a smile to my face every single day. They're existence has made mine bearable. They're music touches me in ways that nothing ever has. I was truly blessed the day I found them, even though I didn't realized it at the time.

~🏵️~

I'm sure everyone thinks I'm unstable. How many 44 year old moms do you know who dance their way around the grocery store with their earbuds in, picking up the ingredients to make kimchi fried rice, while listening to (and singing) Baepsae? Ha...

It's okay Shae, it doesn't matter if people are looking at you...you just do you

It's all my kids fault, really. My two youngest girls, who probably also think I'm certifiably insane...but if not for them, I most likely wouldn't know who BTS is. I know I should be thanking them, every day, for pushing me to listen, and learn about them. 

First, I picked on them, because they were listening to music they couldn't understand, being sung by 7 kids who all looked exactly the same. Then, eventually, I heard one song, and kinda liked it. Then a second song...and it was all downhill from there.

Next thing I knew, I was learning to tell them apart. That took about 2 weeks of my girls sending me pics of each of them, and testing me. I would occasionally still confuse Jimin and Suga, but I was getting much better. The day came that I looked at them and went "oh my God...they aren't kids at all!" I was able to appreciate each one of them, and see their individual characteristics, and just how beautiful they each were. Now I can tell them apart by certain body parts alone...but I'll keep the details to myself.

However, there's one, I just can't get over how absolutely gorgeous he is...I could spend the rest of my life simply looking at this man, and listening to him sing, and I would be happy.

Calm. Down. Woman

Kim Taehyung...the man is a gift from God above. He is perfection, he is beauty, he is adorable, he is sexy, he is funny, and his voice makes me go weak in the knees.

 Unfortunately, I'm old enough to be his mother.

That's right Shae, and don't you forget it. There's a place in hell for women like you. Leave that boy for someone his own age...

But it's not fair, it's not my fault I was born so long ago, and so far away.

And It's not like I would ever get to meet him anyway. Except maybe in my dreams.