Stay With Me {KTH FF}

Dreaming

Little did I know, those two girls were up to something... Something that would end up changing my life forever.

~🌺~

"Girls...come-onnn, you're gonna be late for the bus!"

"We're coming, sheesh mom, you don't gotta yell..."

Why do I have this same conversation with them every weekday morning?

They came scrambling down the stairs, each grabbing a banana out of the fruit bowl, and headed out the front door to catch the school bus. 

"See ya later mom...love you."

"Have a good day...Saranghae" I said. 

They looked back and rolled their eyes at me. "Moooom..."

I just smiled at them and gave them a finger heart, closing the door. As I passed by the window, I noticed they had their heads together going down the driveway, looking at the laptop, not really watching where they were going. I shook my head, and went to finish my coffee.

What the heck are those girls doing? If they aren't careful, they'll walk into traffic or something...

Not that there was traffic on our road. It was a dead end dirt road. But that wasn't the point.

They had been on that laptop all weekend. They do like their technology, but they don't normally spend so much time on it. I may have to put a time limit on their internet use if it keeps up.

Time to put on my music and get my housework done.

It's strange, but things that I use to do and grumble about are now so much more enjoyable with my music. I look forward to my chores now, and I no longer procrastinate over the things I use to dislike. As long as BTS is playing in my ear, or booming thru the surround sound vibrating the windows, I'm happy!

An hour later, I had accomplished what I wanted to for the day, so I decided to grab a glass of lemonade and go sit on the deck by the pool. It was finally getting warm enough to enjoy being outside. Winter seemed to last forever this year.

I started to gather what I needed, glad I had some time to myself before the girls got home from school.

Sunglasses...✔
Lemonade...✔
Earbuds...✔
Cell phone...✔

I made my way to my lounge chair, and settled down to enjoy the sunshine. I felt at peace. It was nice. Sometimes I felt like I should be grieving over the loss of my husband a year ago...but I had, I grieved over the fact that he chose to live his life the way he did, which resulted in his health becoming worse, which eventually resulted in his death.

People seem to think you should grieve forever, but it just doesn't always work that way. I know there are those close to me who believe I didn't really love my husband, because I didn't cry at his funeral. But I'd spent years crying, and I just couldn't cry anymore. I knew it was coming, and I was prepared for it. He is in a better place now, with no troubles, and for that I'm grateful.

I'm also grateful that he had life insurance, because without it, I couldn't have paid for his funeral. I was able to put some aside for the girls, should they decide to go to college. They don't know it, thank goodness, because if they did, they would have been trying to talk me into buying tickets to the BTS concert next month for sure.

And they probably would have succeeded, too, shae...

But I stayed strong when they first told me, and told them we couldn't afford to go. Their education is more important.

We are doing okay right now, and being that I work from home, I get to make my own hours, or take a day off if I choose. And today, that is exactly what I choose to do!

~🌼~

"Mom"

Someone was whispering at me...but I wasn't ready to open my eyes.

"Mom" louder this time. Damn it, my earbuds must have died.

I opened my eyes to my youngest daughter 3 inches from my face.

"What?"

"What's for dinner? It's 5:30, and you obviously fell asleep out here. We've been home from school for an hour already, and we're hungry."

I groaned.

"Seriously, you are both old enough to fix your own dinner...like, can't you work the microwave?"

"Does that mean we're having hot pockets for dinner again?" She whined.

"Probably...unless there's a pizza in the freezer. And why are you complaining...most kids love hot pockets"

I looped my arm thru hers and dragged her towards the house, humming Best of Me, while she rolled her eyes and groaned as if I were dragging her to her death...

Kids...they are so dramatic sometimes.