Clash With My Crush

twenty two

Pare-parehas kaming tahimik dahil ngayon lang ulit kami tatapak ng stage para mag perform. It's overwhelming pero mas lamang yung takot.

"Do not fucking move too much." Saway sakin nung makeup artist. You see not everyone in this company treated me right. Just because I'm from thailand. Kaya madalas minamaliit nila ako. Kahit pa nung nag debut ako walang nag bago.

The only people who respect me, are my members. They never judge or treated me like a trash. Yes Jennie bullied me but she still respect me as a person, unlike the trainees and staff in this company na walang ginagawa kundi i-critize ako. I don't understand them.

"Costume! Faster! Susunod na Kayo!" Sabay sabay kaming tumayo at pumasok ng dressing room.

Hindi ko alam kung anong trip nung stylist namin para pag suotin ako green gloves, tangina para akong mag u-urong neto.

Umiling nalang ako, naniniwala naman akong, I can rock everything. Agad akong lumabas ng dressing room at ni-retouch ulit yung make-up namin.

"Stand by!" Sigaw nung director kaya tumayo kami sa back stage. Nakikita kong peperform na ang isang rookie group.

"I'm so nervous feeling ko mahihimatay ako." Nag salita si jisoo na nanginginig ang kamay. 

"Do we all?" Umangat ang kilay ni rose. "Calm your boobs."

"What the fuck?! kalmado yung boobs ko? Anong sinasabi mo?"

"seriously? Jisoo? Seriously?" Di makapaniwalang tanong ni rose at ingat ang hintuturo nya. "Talk to my finger."

"Bakit may bibig ba yang finger mo? Ang weird mo din, rose."

Bahagyang napakamot ng ulo si rose at pinanood nalang yung performance nung rookie group. Nakakunot parin ang noo ni jisoo habang nakatingin sa finger ni rose.

Nilingon ko si Jennie na kanina pa tahimik. Nakanguso sya habang nakapatong ang daliri nya sa labi nya.

"Nervous?"

Cute na tumango si Jennie at kinagat ang labi nya. One minute nalang tatapak na ulit kami ng stage after namin mawala ng one year.

"Don't be and you're not alone, okey?"

"Okey." Ngumiti sya kaya napangiti din ako. I confidently reached her hands and squeeze it. Parang nagulat sya Kaya natawa ako at kinurot ang chubby cheeks nya.

Clingy at affectionate akong tao, habang kabaligtaran ko si Jennie kaya kahit dati pa ay lagi nya nang nireject yung affection ko kaso nakakataba ng puso na nakatingin lang sya sakin gamit yung mala-pusa nyang mga mata habang nakanguso

"Baby, Cheer up."

Napaiwas ako nang tingin matapos kong sabihin yon nauna nang tumapak sa stage. Pinaypayan ko ang muka ko at bumuga. Lumabas din si Jennie na medyo namumula at iniiwasan ako nang tingin.

Namatay ang ilaw Kaya pwumesto na kami sa kanya kanya naming pwesto. Nasa harap ko si Jennie at nasa likod ko si jisoo.

Nag simulang tumugtog yung beat at agad kaming sumayaw. I feel confident and free lalo na pag nag sasayaw ako.

Napangiti ako sa isip habang naririnig ang fanchat Ng mga blinks. Nakakataba ng puso yung supporta nila kung kaya ko lang sila pasalamantan Isa isa. 

"And cut!" Tumango kami at kumaway sa mga blinks bago pumunta ng waiting room. agad akong umupo sa sofa hindi dala ng pagod kundi nang mag kahalong kaba at excitement.

"Oh god? Why are you crying?" Narinig kong tanong ni rose kaya napalingon ako sa pwesto ni jennie. Umiiyak sya ngayon. Kumabog ang dibdib ko at agad akong lumapit at lumuhod sa harap nya.

I cupped her face and wiped her tears using my thumb. "What's wrong?" Malambing kong tanong.

"I-i made a-a m-mistake." She cried. Good thing na kami palang apat ang nasa loob ng waiting room. "I-i ruined the performance."

"No, you didn't. You did a great job, don't beat up yourself plus and nobody is perfect."

"But we're an idols. Everyone expects us to be perfect. Na bigyan natin sila ng magandang performance or else they'll bash and hate us. I-I'm b-bringing this g-group d-down."

"No, baby that's not true." I whispered. Mas Lalo yata syang naiyak sa sinabi ko. I chuckled at pinunasan ulit ang muka nya. she's still a baby.

My baby.

"Jennie you don't. We're a team at kahit mag kamali ka pa okey lang yon." Nag salita si rose.

"And I also made a mistake, normal Lang yon dahil halos ilang buwan din tayong nawala. Kaya wag Kang umiyak~" kumanta si jisoo na may hawak pang suklay na ginawa nyang mic.

Natawa kaming lahat sa pagiging maloko ni jisoo. Humarap ako kay Jennie at nginitian sya. "See? Kaya don't cry, sige ka iiyak din ako." Pananakot ko Kaya natawa sya.

"Okey!" Ngumiti sya at tumango. "I just feel sorry but I promise next stage gagalingan ko na."

she's beautiful and talented but sadly she not aware of it. In our group she always bring herself down and put herself at the last.

But for me she's the best.

I love how she always tried to make her performance better even though sometimes she forgot that she's still human and everyone has a limitation.

She wants to have perfect performance because she is force to face the expectations of our company and the netizen.

You're not perfect Jennie but you're perfect in my eyes.