people who are in love with the idea of love simply don't know what it is like.
they have never loved.
they have never ripped their soul out from under their skin and bones and given it to another.
they have never disconnected every artery, every vein from their heart and handed it to some one on a plate.
they have never ached inside their body like an empty cave.
i have.
and that is something i will never understand.
why is this feeling so wanted?
why is it so seeked?
because it fucking hurts.
it hurts a lot.
i want to crawl into a ball and weep for him.
i want every bad thing that happens to him to happen to me.
i want him to never hurt.
i want him to smile.
i want him to be himself.
i want him to know that he's loved.
i want him to love himself.
he's my clarity.
my mind is scattered and my thoughts are a rainstorm but he clears it all.
he numbs the pain.
he is the pain.
i am the pain.
he makes me feel alive inside, instead of feeling like a skeleton laying in an abandoned graveyard.
he makes me feel like i'm okay.
he makes me okay.
he makes me not okay.
he makes me feel like i could live again.
he makes me live.
he is the one.
he's always been the one.
and he always will be the one.
i cant change that and neither can he.
to be loved is to be on the back of some one with a broken spine.
but to love is to be the person with the broken spine.
