Promises🤞🏻 [Jaegan]

|Chapter 17|

JUSTINS POV:

i sit in my room, staring blankly at the ceiling. i wish i could take everything back. i wish i could reserve time and do everything differently. i never wanted to lose jayden.

*knock knock*

"come in." i say and my bedroom door opens, revealing raegan. he walks in, looking behind for a moment, and then shutting the door behind him.

"justin-" is all he says before stopping and taking a breath.

"what rae?" i ask a little irritated, not wanting to deal with anyone right now.

he comes closer to me, taking one step at a time. he sits on my bed right in front of me. we stare into each other's eyes and his face starts to lean in a little closer to mine. i just watch him, not moving or saying anything. he brings his right hand onto my cheek and i notice he's very close to my face now.

he tilts his head and that's when i close my eyes, feeling his lips touch mine. his hand right goes to the back of my neck and pulls me closer to him. i put my hands on his body, around his stomach area. i pull his shirt slightly, him coming even closer to me.

our lips lock and unlock in sync. as i keep my eyes closed not caring what's happening right now. i needed something. anything.

"what are-" i pull away for a second. "what are you doing?" i ask him, catching my breath.

"i um.." he trails off. "you do not deserve jayden at all, he treated you like shit. you're amazing justin."

"thank you but you love ant, don't you?" i ask him and he simply nods his head "then why?"

"i feel something." is all he says. "i did the first time and the second time too."

"anthony doesn't deserve this, raegan." i point out to him after a few seconds and he slowly takes his hand off my neck.

"i-i know but he doesn't have to know." he says to me and i just realize what he's saying now. i shake my head slightly at him.

"no. no i'm not doing this to my best friend." i say, even though i want to do this. i would love to have raegan to myself and be able to kiss his perfect lips. but he's dating my best friend.

"i know anthony doesn't deserve this but i feel like we could do something. you need to feel something after what jayden did to you." he says to me and puts his hand on my thigh.

"jayden had every right." i almost whisper, feeling myself swallow tears. "i cheated."

"but anthony-"

"not everyone is as forgiving as anthony, raegan." i tell him and he nods slowly, understanding. i just sit there, looking down at the floor. i fiddle with my fingers.

"think about it?" he asks and i look at him confused.

"think about what?"

he doesn't say anything and just slowly but smoothly leans in to kiss me once again. it's quick but gentle. what the hell is going on?

he pulls away and just stands up, leaving my room. i cover my face and fall back on my bed. i sigh and again, just look up at my ceiling.

what does he expect? i cant do that to anthony. he loves raegan. he wants to be such a fuckboy.

i quickly got up off my bed and walk downstairs, seeing ant and raegan watching a movie. they have their arms around each other. i just walk into the kitchen, thinking if i should tell ant. no i can't. that'll break his heart. and i can't date raegan.

"hey, i just ordered a pizza." i hear behind me and see ant standing there, a smile on his face.

"okay cool." i say.

"you can definitely have some. just wait about a half hour." he tells me and i nod, thanking him. "you alright?" he asks.

"mhm." i say, and walk around him, going back upstairs. great, i made it obvious that something is wrong. raegan wants me to be his damn fuck buddy or whatever.

i cant do that to my best friend..right?

ik it's short and it's been a while i'm sorry. i'm just really missing someone atm and i just hope she's okay.
love you guys, i'll update soon again hopefully idk