𝕊ℙ𝕀𝔻𝔼𝕐

The fallen hero (pt. 1)

Tony Stark's POV

Hey, Mr. Stark.

It was nice knowing you.

But I'm at my limit.

I can't go on.

All the pain...

All the guilt...

It won't fade away someday.

It will always be tattooed in my mind.

But what am I saying?

You wouldn't even care.

If you cared, you would actually be here for me.

But I'm just a useless nobody.

Nobody loves me.

I'm a mistake.

A failure.

I'm a waste of space.

I'm a waste of time.

I'm a waste of money.

I'm a waste of love.

Everybody I love leaves me.

I'm never good enough. Never will be.

I will never reach your expectation.

I'm sorry I wasted your money on all those music lessons only to come back empty handed.

I know I dissapointed you. But like I said before, I can never live up to you.

Flash Thompson pointed that out to me, clearly.

Everything that happens is always my fault.

Weather I did it or not.

I get scolded for doing something wrong.

I get scolded for trying to do something good.

I will always get in the way.

I know you told me not to be part of the problem, but part of the solution. But I will always be part of the problem since I am the problem.

I always wondered why I didn't kill myself or ran away...

I had a foolproof plan.

I'll steal your ATM card since I know your password.

And live on the street or buy a house from the money in your ATM.

But I never did.

Why?

Because I think there's someone out there that loves me. Someone that will cry or grief when I am gone.

Even if it isn't you.

But I think they would be better off without me in their life.

But, now I'm tired.

Tired of life.

Everytime you tell at me or get angry at me. Every word you say, it might not be laced with venom, but it surely did a good job at breaking my heart.

But when you been saying the same thing for far too many time, it doesn't make my heart hurt anymore. I guess I grew accustomed to those hateful words.

So, I'll make everyone's life easier.

If you're reading this, then I'm no longer there.

I leave you the legacy of Spiderman.

But that's also useless since I'm a menace and a shame to the hero world.

Then I leave you the legacy of Peter St- I mean Parker.

The nerdy boy who can't stay in this world any longer.

The fallen hero who is a menace.

Goodbye, Mr. Stark.

I give you permission to tell the world that I, Peter Benjamin Parker, was the Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman, who couldn't get back up and fight the battle anymore.

At least I know someone will be happy that I am gone.

I now say it for the last time,

"Goodbye, Mr. Stark"

And Karen shuts down the recording of Peter's last message for me.

I look around the Avengers common room to see tears in everyone's eye. Especially, Nat's. Peter was like a son to her.

The thought of losing another person in our life was just terrible. His friend, Ned and the girlfriend, MJ were holding each other while silently crying for their friend who will no longer come back...

A/N: Thank you so much for reading. There's probably a book two. So, stay tuned! If you want to comment, please do so in English or Thai since I don't want to translate it. Cheerios!

-19 July, 2019