Tagged

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Probably the only "Tagged" im keeping permanently since this took so long. I promise a chapter is coming this week.

Tagged by @joyrisuperiorship

• BIRTHDAY
7 January

SEXUAL ORIENTATION
Biromantic

• CRUSH / PARTNER
N/A

• OCCUPATION / DREAM JOB
Student/singer, diplomat, writer

• COUNTRY OF RESIDENCE
Hungary

• HOMESCREEN + LOCKSCREEN

• HOMESCREEN + LOCKSCREEN

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• MAIN SHIP / PAIRING IN FANFICJenlisa/Lisrene/Spiderchelle

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• MAIN SHIP / PAIRING IN FANFIC
Jenlisa/Lisrene/Spiderchelle

• REASON TO JOIN WATTPAD
Bored

• MOST IMPORTANT/FAVOURITE MEMORY
Okay, this is going to be long. Like 10000+ words long. AKA 5 times my usual chapter. Skip if you like.

Story time it is. Okay, this is going to be a bit sad and stuff, but whatever.
So basically, when I was in year 3, I dont really drink a lot of water. This continued for 2 years, when one day, I felt my leg hurt a lot that I kept on crying and I couldnt sleep. So we went to the hospital at 2 am. There, they did many tests on me, I don't remember much, but they suspect that I have cancer. So school just started for a week, I went to school with a wheelchair becuase I couldnt even walk.
Then one week later, my dad fixed my resignation paper and I flew back to Thailand (from Taiwan) and continued my treatment there. They did another bone marrow test and they confirmed it.
I had acute lymphocytic leukemia (white blood cell cancer), and it was all because I didnt drink enough water. The cells adapted to the dehydration.
I had to be hospitalised for months. I became really weak, and I had low immunity system. I couldnt go outside, I couldnt play, I couldnt do any exercise,  i couldnt eat a lot of things like ice cream and fruits. I missed a lot of my childhood. I had to wear a mask all day for years. I missed a whole year of school. I couldnt see my friends and all I could really do all day was sleep  drink water, take my meds and watch TV.
My parents and other relatives had work, so it was just my grandma and I.
My hair started falling a lot. Like they would fall off in clumps just with a single tug. I refused to shave my head or wear a wig, so my head was pretty bare except a few strands of hair.
A few months later, and I clearly remember watching bubble guppies (i could only watch kid shows). We always had stray cats wondering around our house. We had left over chicken, and my grandma said she was going to give it to one of them. I didnt pay any attention to that. Then I heard a thump. I thought it was just the sound of my 80 year old grandma sitting on the chair so I didnt care. It was only when I heard a car arrive did I go to great my parents, when I found my grandma lying on the floor surrounded by her own blood. She fell. And you know old people should not be bleeding. I was in a state of shock and I didnt know what to do. I quickly went to phone my other relatives, even the one in Argentina (which was dumb, but i was dumb). I cried so much cuz i thought that her injury was on me. An ambulance came and my aunt went with them, while my dad drove my mum to the hospital. I had to stay with my neighbors and I cried to them. Her conditions only worsen from there. She had to be hospitalised for weeks. She would get discharged, xome home, then go back to the hospital again. One day, her condition was really bad so we had to quickly drive her to the hospital in the middle of the night. She stayed there for a few days. Then one day, my parents finally allowed me to go see her. I showed her that I was fine, that I was getting better. I knew she couldnt respond to me, but I made sure I looked happy. It was a Saturday, I remembered that. I remember going back and sleeping happily. The next day, me and my dad went to this charity for animal lives. It was something we rarely did since it was really expensive. Right after we finished, my dad got a call from my mum. He said something like "I'm really sorry.", he didnt tell me about it so I didnt really mind. It wasnt until later that day that my mom told me that her mum died that day. It really hurts because until now, I still think that it's my fault that she died. If I wasnt such a selfish jerk, only focusing on that dumb cartoon, maybe I could've prevented or softened the fall. Then her condition wouldnt spiral down and die. They told me not to blame myself, but how can I not? It was obviously my fault. We had her funeral a few weeks later, and her divorced husband showed up. I dont see my grandpa that often. My aunt flew all the way from Argentina. It was my first funeral and I felt guilty. Like I said, I blamed myself.
After a year of treatment, I could go outside now.
What made it worse was the fact that she died during the Thai's new year. The once happy holiday turned gloomy.
But yeah, a few months later, I started going to school, I reconnected with my old friends (from pre Taiwan time) and we became close again. I still had to wear a mask all the time. People looked at me weirdly because I had to wear a mask and a cap all the time.
I struggled with my studies since, even if I'm thai. during the 4 years I lived in Taiwan, I never studied thai at all. I was mocked for my accent (I spoke really clear Thai pronouciation and no slangs at all which they found weird), and I was mocked for my love of singing. They used the fact that I had cancer as an insult. But I secretly wrote in my notebook something along the line of "it's okay. They said I had cancer, so what? It shows that I'm strong, I made it this far already didnt i?".
I had a crush on a boy that time.
Which is okay. I'm not gay, just biromantic.
But anyway. I had this monthly appointment with the doctors on wendnesday, and the next day, I found a letter under my desk saying that the boy I liked, likes my back. Which is absurd since he had a girlfriend. I analysed the letter, and I found lots of clues. One being that my friend wrote it, as well as HIS friends. The dates were mixed up, but I wont bore you with more. I attached a note to him saying that could he please tell his friends to stop sending notes to me?
All he did, was show his table mates (which also included his gf), and they laughed about it. He wrote back, saying "dont bother me. You disgust me. Stop sending notes.". You can probably tell I was hurt by that. I just asked him for ONE favour. I never sent him any notes before. And he called me disgusting. But my stupid ass still kept that note, even if my crush of 4 years has passed, because that was the longest he spoke to me. We once sat next to each other, but he ignored me and always spoke to his gf's friend. My friend once had a seating arrangement next to him and that was my excuse to sit in his spot.
It was fine. I got over it.
Anyway, back track a little.
Having cancer, meant taking a shit ton of meds. Not to mention numerous blood tests and lumbar puncture (which hurts so fucking much, I can still feel it). After all these years, I still feel super uncomfortable taking meds. It was fine for like 2 and a half years, until phase 4 (our of 5). On Wednesday, I had to take 1 big pill, and 7 little pills. It was a nightmare. I had to force myself to take them all, and some would get stuck in my throat and it was so bitter. Now after all these years, even the smallest pill would make me want to throw up.
I was so happy, when they said I enter phase 5. It was the monitoring phase. It technically lasts for a bit more than 10 years. That was about 3 years ago. The doctor said I didnt have to take any more meds. I just had to come for regular check up. I didn't have any cancer any more, but the 10 years were like guaranteed years that cancer would DEFINITELY not come back. Yhe check up gradually became less frequent. From once a month, to 2 months time, to 6 months, and now it's a yearly check up.
Life is finally getting better.
Now I'm studying in Hungary after leaving my friends again.
I would tear up anytime something close to blood cancer was mentioned cuz I hate myself for wasting 3 years of my childhood. At least now I didnt have to wear a mask all the time (fuck covid).
One thing that made me hate even more was my fitness. I used to be one of the fittest in my class, but after chemotherapy, my muscles were pretty much nonexistent. I have tried regaining my fitness back, but its hard. I'm trying even harder now since I joined the varsity basketball team, and football team. But my stamina still sucks. I run pretty slow and I get tired easily. It's the aftermath of chemotherapy. I'm defintely bummed about that, but it was either this, or I die.
I love sports, but now? I don't know anymore...
Its just, a lot of my-life was wasted because of cancer. It wasted so much of my time that I could've been spending, working on my dancing skills that I had to drop. My sports stuff that wouldve made me really good at baseball and stuff.
It's a lot.
It's a lot of things I'm missing out.
All because I didnt like drink water.
I regret a lot of things, and this is certainly one of them.
Of course, during the time I undergo chemotherapy, there were some good times as well. Like that one time a younger kid with cancer came to the cancer ward dressed up as Santa claus and handed out gifts (I was admitted to the hospital during Christmas). The kid is nice. We talked a fee times after getting discharged and we actually live pretty close.
But then there was this other kid, we became friends since we saw each other a lot when we get hospitalised. Sadly, he died. He was a nice guy and we got along.
Having cancer also changed my point of view on hospitals. People see them as a bad thing, but I see it as a place where good people make people better. If it weren't for hospitals, I would he dead by now. I owe them a lot, so I would usually donate money to the cancer hospital or the public hospital I got treated at. I also made sure to buy vdo players for the kid's wart since they treated me so nicely and they dont have enough for their patients. I'm just showing them my gratitude.
I hope that was a good story for you tho :)

I should make it into a book...
Suggestions?

• FAVOURITE WATTPADIAN
JakeyP99
troublesince2002
scatteredbeans
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FAVOURITE PART OF YOURSELF
My cheekbone

• MOST REDEEMING QUALITY OF YOURSELF
I'm loyal :)

• (OPTIONAL) PICTURE OF YOURSELF

• FAVOURITE SINGER +/ SONGRight now, Red Velvet "Peek a boo", Charlie Puth "Dangerously", Bruno Mars "Grenade"

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• FAVOURITE SINGER +/ SONG
Right now, Red Velvet "Peek a boo", Charlie Puth "Dangerously", Bruno Mars "Grenade"

• FAVOURITE ANIMAL
Anything in the cat family

• DO YOU HAVE A PET? WHAT IS IT
I don't have a pet, but I'm kinda looking after all the stray cats near me.

• FAVOURITE BOOK ON WATTPAD
"Changes" by troublesince2002

• WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON THAT TAGGED YOU
They are really nice and write incredible books

• ANGST or FLUFF or SMUT
Fluff ☺

Tag:
JakeyP99
-COCKAINE
deathbyjenlisa
peachlalisaa
JackSapphire
neggyyyyyyyy_L
Ary_Stirlingite
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