TANTRIC (Book 3 of the Soundcrush Series)

Chapter 7: Front Men Fight With Their Baby-Momma's

Hi Guys! You may have been wondering where in the world your updates were...I've been on a little getaway, but now I'm back! Let's check in with Leed and see how life with baby is!

The song for this chapter is How's It Going To Be by Third Eye Blind. I think Leed, Tam, and Ben are all wondering exactly how it's going to be as they try to navigate their parenting and personal relationships...read on...

Leed

I stumble down the hall to Ollie's room and flip on the switch for the tiny lamp, mumbling "I got him," into the baby monitor so Tam and Ben can stay in bed. Ollie is moving restlessly, kicking his legs and fussing but not full-out calling for us. I rewrap his blankets and put a hand on his tummy, hoping he'll settle. The kid is laid-back; he's already sleeping through the night more than half the time. After a couple of minutes, I get real with the fact that tonight is not one of those nights.

"Alright, alright, be cool little man," I pick him up, grab a diaper and some wipes and hustle down the hall to the kitchen. I put a bottle in the warmer and change his diaper while it heats. In ninety seconds we are kicked back on the couch. Ollie does this weird thing where he tries to avoid taking a bottle nipple, because he would rather have Tam feed him.

"I know, you like the real thing," I murmur, pushing the nipple softly against his puckered, unhappy lips, trying to wet them with a taste of milk. "I'm with ya, man. You're a lot luckier than me, though. You'll be back on the boob in the morning, and I ain't seen no joy in months, except in my dreams. So help a daddy out, okay? Take a little snack, so we can both get back to sweet dreams, okay Ollie?"

Ollie is a real reasonable cat; he understood everything I said, and he accepts the bottle nipple and starts to suck away happily.

I sigh in relief, and I hear a soft chuckle behind me. Ben shuffles around softly in the kitchen, opening and closing the refrigerator. It's the middle of the night to me, but Ben gets up at 0'Dark-Thirty to lift a thousand pounds of free weights a million different ways, four days a week. I know he's in there right now mixing a pre-workout drink.

He brings his shake, tosses a coconut water casually at me, and sits down on the the perpendicular leg of the sectional, combing through his cropped blonde hair as he drinks.

"You're not the only one SOL right now, you know," he says dryly. "Tam and I have had sex exactly one time since she got the all-clear. "

"Dude, normally I'm completely down to swap war stories, but that's my baby-momma you are talking about," I say dryly. I really don't want to hear about Tam and Ben's sex life. I heard the event in question in real time, thanks to the thin walls in Ben's house, and I don't want a recap.

"Yeah, well, she's my wife, and it sucks that she's self-conscious about having sex with me because her baby-daddy is in the next room. We need to have a serious talk, Leed. We are working great when it comes to Ollie, but I think it's time we make a change. We can't go on like this forever."

"Dude, you don't have to tell me that. You need to tell your wife. Because I've tried."

It's true. As much as I can't imagine what it's going to be like not seeing Ollie every single day, I'm with Ben. I know this can't go on forever. Honestly, the longer I stay at Ben and Tam's, the harder it's going to be to make a change. I've been trying to tell Tam this since Ollie was three weeks old. Every time I mention moving back home, she gets unreasonable and starts crying. I have always hated to see her cry, because it's so rare. So I pat her arm, and tell her I was just thinking out loud, and we can talk about it later.

She also gets edgy whenever I leave the house for more than half an hour without her. That is starting to irritate me a little. Ben goes to work, and she's fine. And she's cool with leaving Ollie with me to run her own errands, even though most of the time we go together. But if I step outside solo she acts like I'm going to bolt and never return. If I mention going to get a beer with Trace or something, the plan always gets busted by some urgent need Tam has.