The Drug Dealer's Wife.

#28 - Numb

Paula balling and screaming was never any good. At first I thought she was being mad dramatic because Bryson notified her that we had gotten into it, and possibly heading for divorce. But the look in her eyes showed me different. Something was wrong. Seriously.

Divine begged me to not go outside and see what my mother-in-law's problem was. She thought it was a trap to get me back under Bryson's realm. According to my best friend, I was doing better, looking happier. And associating myself with anyone regarding Bryson would only set me back tremendously. But I couldn't just leave Paula outside of Divine's house crying and screaming as frantic as she was, right? Bryson's little brother Benji showed his face, eyeing me aggressively. Oh now I had to go see what's up.

And so I did. I couldn't make out Paula's words properly, but the doleful look from Bryson's youngest brother Benji was enough to tell me that the worst has happened. When it rains, it definitely pours. I leaned up on Benji's car, as he slowly told me what had transpired. Never would I expect to hear that my husband was drunk driving, and eventually got into a huge car crash. Benji held onto my hand for support when he realized that tears were dropping from my eyes. They weren't joking around, huh? 

My heart was thumping, and my head was giddy. Benji's words kept repeating themselves in my brain, and I just couldn't understand why or how this took place. It didn't make sense. Normally Bryson was the one on my ass for delving into too much liquor, the man had never even gotten drunk before. So for him to go out like this wasn't adding up. Call it denial, but I refused to believe that my husband had passed.

Ignoring Paula's cries, I demanded Benji to show me proof. I needed to see something, anything. They couldn't just pull up on me and drop this huge bomb, and not expect me to react. Divine was by my side now, and she was actually apologizing to my mother and brother in-law for my 'irrational' behavior. Tuh. They ain't seen nothing yet.

I was erratic. Tears were flowing, I was yelling. This was all too much. For a moment, everyone just looked at me, watching me spaz out. They could never understand my position. Bryson was the love of my life, my fucking soulmate. He was the one person I didn't want to live this life without. And now he's just...gone?

Feeling was leaving itself from my body. This unexpected news left me cold and emotionally unstable. My heart was beating faster than usual, and I was getting out of breath. I closed my eyes for a moment, only to open them to see my best friend and Benji looking down on me with worried faces. Divine sighed in relief, pulling me closer to her. Looking around, I noticed I was on the ground, and blood was gushing from my forehead. Hm, when did all this happened?

I panted, hoping to cease the suffocating feeling that absorbed my body. Fresh tears filled my eyes, and a cold state returned to me. Divine said something to Benji, who nodded and disappeared quickly. Although my friend was right next to me, I heard nothing. I felt like I was frozen in time, and a recollection of all the memories I shared with Bryson Harding came flooding back. The memories were only making me dizzier, unfocused and sadder.

Divine grabbed my face, forcing me to look at her. I was surely scaring her, for this was the first time she's ever seen me in this manner. She, like everyone else was so used to the rigid, strong Nova. And although Divine wasn't everybody else, she's never witnessed anything affecting me as greatly as this. Shit, even I didn't think anything additional was capable of breaking me down. But I felt completely and utterly defeated.

"Benji went for the medic, and we're going to go to the police station when you calm down." Divine said quietly.

I managed a nod, and my friend helped me rise from the ground. Divine sat with me as a paramedic soothed my injury, and we sat hand in hand on our way to the police station. My sis was just there, guiding me and reassuring me. I squeezed her hand, not only for support but for gratitude. She was a real one.

Benji's Range Rover came to a sudden stop when we arrived at the police station. Pausing, he looked back at his mother, Divine and I with an unresponsive look. He too had to be going through it. Bryson was more than a brother to him, he was a whole father figure. My husband looked out and helped raise each of his siblings when their father got incarcerated. He just assumed that position with no questions asked. Paula always said Bryson was the 'reasonable and peaceful' son. And now this shit happens.

I was proud of Benji, because he had a whole brave face on. He assisted us women out of his vehicle, acting like the true gentleman his brother raised him to be. God, this hurts. This hurts so much.

My eyes landed on Samuels when I entered. He was in a daze, much like myself. His eyes were red, and his normally put together self was distorted. Our eyes linked, and he reached out for me. I surprisingly grabbed onto his hand and he guided me to a room in the back of the police department.

"He had so much potential." Samuels murmured about five minutes later. "A true king. He will be remembered forever."

Hearing Samuels speak on my husband in the past tense brought more tears, and a shuddering feeling to me. I was in too much pain to even have any kind of animosity towards Eman. I don't think I even had the right to be mad at him anymore. We just stood there completely zoned out, staring at nothing.

Eman grabbed onto a door handle, pulling it slightly. He urged me to follow, and when I did I was even more shocked and unstable. The empty room had nothing but a table, which had a bunch of papers shattered all around it. As I ease closer to identify each paper, I noticed they were actually photographs of the accident Bryson was involved in. Pictures of his now ruined red Ferrari was plastered all over the table, and the sight of it was unbearable. From the pictures, Bryson didn't stand a chance at surviving. His car was completely dismantled.

"Here." Samuels said softly.

I turned slowly, trying to blink away the horrific scenes I just saw. Samuels showed me a package, which I guess were the things Bryson left behind.

"His remains were unrecognizable. The explosion of his car was too intense. But the police did gather some of his things." Eman Samuels continued.

Samuels took the objects out of the envelope, revealing Bryson's favorite watch and wedding band. He spread them out on a small tray, and seeing the tangible items made me sick to my stomach.

I was totally speechless and frozen as I watched Bryson's bloody belongings sit on a lone tray. He was gone. My Bryson was really gone. And his death hits harder because I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye.