Trainwreck |✔️

CHAPTER 31

This is it guys... the ultimate chapter but not the end... I read and appreciate every comment even if I don't find time to reply to them all... so please let me know what you think ☺️❤️ Hope you enjoy it 💜

Ants POV

My eyes fluttered open as the feeling of emptiness surrounded my body. It felt like I had been caught in a stampede but a worse feeling was the isolation and loneliness that enveloped me. I realised the reason as soon as the photons of light through the window had stopped assaulting my eyes.

Dec wasn't there.

My mind spiralled into a whirlpool of depressing thoughts. He was gone... he'd finally couldn't bare to be around me. He hated me. There was a kindle of hope before... when I'd held him... and I put out that light faster than a fire extinguisher.

Shakily, I sat up from the bed, unable to smell his scent on the sheets anymore knowing I definitely wasn't welcome anywhere near him.

I looked around for my clothes and spotted my jacket and clean shirt hung on the chair. Carefully, with a hand on the bed for support, I weakly wobbled over to the chair and pulled on my clothes. A deep sense of overwhelming hopelessness drowned me. I had lost everything... I had a job but why get money when you had nothing left to live for? I just wanted Dec... it was all I'd ever wanted... I just wished I deserved him... I wished he could trust me.

My hands stuffed in my pockets, completely ready to walk out the door until my fingers brushed against fabric and my heart stilled. My photo!

Shit its not there! When I panicked... Dec must have... oh god he's gonna think I'm a creep... he's gonna get a restraining order on me! Oh god you soppy idiot!! Move on and leave him alone!!

My head frantically whipped around, my eyes scanning the room, trying to locate the picture... my eyes fell on a piece of paper on the bedside table, holding my bruised torso for extra support, I hurried over to it.

It wasn't the picture, it was a note, written in neat handwriting, well neater than mine anyway.

Anth,

I know what you're thinking stop being an idiot. No you haven't finally managed to scare me off. If I'm not here when you wake it's because I've gone for some fresh air.

Yours,

Declan x

My heart sped up as I read the letter over and over again. He doesn't hate me? 'Yours' does that mean... what it sounds like? Or is that a normal way to sign off a letter? Oh god I need to talk to him... I can't live like this anymore... I need to know how he feels... need to be set free from this purgatory, this limbo because it's torture. I need him to know how I feel, how amazing he is and how sorry I am for ruining us.

Carelessly I dropped the letter and made my way out of the bedroom and down the stairs. My torso still hurt but it was becoming bearable and right now the pain in my heart was what needed fixing.

My whole body froze as I was about to walk past the entrance of the kitchen, I felt eyes on me and not the friendly kind. Bashfully, I turned so my eyes met the petite old women I hadn't seen in 4 years. The judgemental look on her face was well deserved in my opinion, she hadn't said a kind word to me since that day and had expressed very clearly whilst I was being detained by police that she never wanted to see me again.

I stood there awkwardly, crumbling under her scrutiny. My look was apologetic and slightly hesitant but I decided I owed it to her to apologise... even if she didn't want to hear it.