Grown Man

Family

"Why did you do it?" Jungkook asked, breaking the awkward silence that had settled between them minutes ago. His mother had caught up to him right as he reached his car but didn't say anything, thus the silence settled.

She paused, pondering her thoughts carefully. She'd been hoping for this day as much as she'd been dreading it. She'd practiced her explanation in the mirror countless times in hopes that when she saw Jungkook, she wouldn't falter.

"I made a mistake Jungkook. I was young, irresponsible, and selfish and I thought that without you, my life would be easier. I saw you as a burden that did nothing but weigh me down so I left you and for that, I'm sorry." She explained as her eyes filled with tears again, "Bang Si Hyuk convinced me to run away with him. He told me that we could be happy together but that we couldn't do that with you around. I was in a bad place at that point in my life, I'd been sad about how things were going for me, at the fact that my parents kicked me out as a teenager because I'd been pregnant with you. I believed that you ruined my life. I blamed you for how my life turned out so it was easy to believe Si Hyuk, it was easy to leave you behind."

At some point through all of that, Jungkook's façade broke and his emotions could be seen clearly on his face. He was livid!

"I didn't ruin your life! You did that by yourself. You were the one who got pregnant with me. If you didn't want me, why didn't you terminate me? You brought me into this world knowing you couldn't handle the responsibility I came with. You neglected me, used me, let your lovers abuse me both physically and verbally. I still have some scars that they left behind. You did this to me. YOU ruined ME, not the other way around." Jungkook was red with rage, seething with years of anger. His nails were digging painful crescents into his palms but he couldn't be bothered about it right now.

"I know Jungkook, I know that. I can't imagine the trauma you have because of what I put you through. But I've changed Jungkook, I'm a better person now. The biggest regret of my life was leaving you at that bus stop. It's a regret that has kept me up most night for years. I know it will take sometime but please Jungkook, I'm asking for your forgiveness. I'm asking you to give me a chance to show you that I've changed." She pleaded with him, letting her tears fall down to wet her face. At this point, Jungkook was crying too. He couldn't remember the last time he'd cried for her. At some point in his teenage years, he'd promised himself never to shed a single tear for her ever again but yet, here he was, crying like the little boy who cried himself to sleep the first few nights with Jin.

Jungkook pondered it for a moment. She seemed changed, she seemed like she genuinely meant her apology. But there was just something about all of this, something about bringing her back into his life that he just couldn't digest.

"Please Jungkook, we're blood. I'm your family." She added and that's when it clicked for the latter.

Family.

"'Family doesn't end in blood, but it doesn't start there either.'" Jungkook recited a quote he'd come to love over the years, "we're not family. Family stands up for you, stands with you, takes care of you. Family worries about you, family nurtures you. Family loves you. You never did any of those things for me. My Seokjin is my family, the Min's next door to me are my family, the Kim's are my family. You're just the woman who made it possible for me to be here, just like whoever knocked you up is just the man that made it possible for me to be here. You stopped being my family the moment you walked out of my life twelve years ago. Your apology seemed genuine and you do seem like you're truly a changed person but you're twelve years too late." Jungkook removed his hands from her grasp. He didn't realize when she'd been holding on to his clenched fists. "This is goodbye, Miss. Jeon."

He turned around and unlocked the car before getting into the passenger's seat on the other side. He'd driven himself and Jin to the grocery store but he knew he wasn't in the right state of mind to drive back.

His mother knocked on the window of the driver's side where he'd left her but Jungkook didn't once turn to look at her, knowing his resolve might break. Not because he wanted her back, just for the fact that in situations like this, sometimes you just feel the need to take them back.

After realizing that her attempts to get his attention were futile, she sighed deeply before waving at Jungkook, who still wasn't looking at her, and turning away to leave. The door had been unlocked but she knew it would be wrong of her to have entered the car without permission so she left.

A couple minutes later, the door opened and Jin sat on the driver's seat after putting the groceries in the back. He turned to look at Jungkook, who had his head on the dashboard. His frame was shaking, obviously, from crying. Jin simply placed a hand on the latter's back in hopes of comforting him.

Jungkook startled a bit, since he hadn't heard Jin enter the car. His head shot up towards Jin and Jin was met with red, puffy, swollen eyes.

"Baby..." Jin's heart ached for Jungkook and he began stroking up and down the latter's back even though he knew that wasn't going to do much.

"Marry me." Jungkook proposed, suddenly.

"What?" Jin asked, after taking a moment to process what Jungkook had just said.

"Marry me." Jungkook stated again as if Jin simply just hadn't heard him the first time.

"No, I heard what you said, I just want clarification as to why." Jin elaborated, still a little shocked. What on earth had Jungkook discussed with his mother for him to suddenly want to tie the knot with him? They hadn't even been together for longer than a month.

"I want to be a Kim. I hate the name Jeon and all it holds. I hate who it ties me to. You are more of a family to me than my mother ever was and I just want it to be official. I want to be Kim Jungkook." Jungkook explained, between sniffles and there was just something about Jungkook looking the way he did, red eyes and all, that made Jin's heart ache with a concerning amount of love for the younger.

Nevertheless, Jin simply smiled before shaking his head as he spoke, "when you have a better reason for wanting to marry me other than just wanting to rid yourself of your surname, then we'll talk."

Jungkook pouted and Jin simply began stroking Jungkook's back again since he'd stopped from the shock of Jungkook asking him to get married.

"Now, what happened with your mother?" Jin asked and Jungkook immediately looked as hurt as he'd been when Jin had first entered the car and saw him and Jin's heart shattered at the sight. He pulled the younger into a hug, one that Jungkook found comfort in.

He sighed deeply before speaking. Jin listened attentively as he felt Jungkook's tears on his neck. He continued stroking the younger's back, hoping that that soothing action would ease his pain, even just a little bit.