A Collection of Imagines

Shawn

Do I Ever Cross Your Mind?

It's like they're all entranced by him. The crowd, watching him intently whilst screaming their delicately made faces off, seems to be as vast as an ocean. Bountiful and endless. I never had the thrill of performing in Madison Square Garden. I know, a privilege an everyday person has. I know it's completely not benign, but it's normal to him. This is his fourth time performing here and I'm just glad he wanted to this time around with me. 

I'm more nervous than I have ever been. The light little box resting in my back pocket seems to grow in weight with every passing moment. I look at the line up sheet on one of the speakers. Next song, she comes out. Ruin. The song she told me she loved the most when I first sent her a draft of Illuminate. That's not the first time I knew there was something about her, considering the song is about her. She has been my everything for a while now. There was just a few distractions along the way. 

I was surprised when he got with her. I mean, yeah, she was a good friend of his, but I never saw them together. I wouldn't exactly I was ecstatic when they got together. I didn't think I talked to him that much throughout a huge remind of that endeavor. The song ends. He turns to me. The look in his eye makes me excited for what's about to happen. His chocolate brown hair sticks to his forehead due to the sweat that has glistened there. He always had a glow when he performed. He just looked like he was home every time he was up there. He turns back to the mic. 

"Everyone, please welcome a very special person in my life. She's helped me through everything I can think of." I motion to her to come on stage. She walks on and I notice she's wearing one of my sweatshirts. I love that she doesn't feel the need to dress up, even when she's going to perform MSG. Simple, elegant even. Not giving a shit about appearances. That's the difference between her and my last girlfriend. The distraction. An escape from not being able to express my feelings for the beautiful woman in front of me now. The woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. 

I step closer to him. He steps away from his mic, not taking his eyes off of me. He looks like he's about to cry for some reason. I walk past my mic to embrace him. My arms go around his torso under his large arms. I move the earpiece out of the ear that isn't facing the audience. I whisper to him, "Are you ok?"

I wrap my arms around her small figure. I bend down to her ear, "More than ok." She squeezes harder as she moves away from me. Her eyes in full view, searching my face for any fragments of doubt. I shake my head and smile. She reflects my happiness back to me. I push her hands off of me and she laughs as she walks to mic. My eyes watching her every step of the way. She puts her earpieces in and I turn to the band. They start the song and she starts dancing. Her own kind of dorky dancing that makes me laugh every single time. I take the first verse. 

"Do ya?
Do you think about me?
And, do ya?
Do you feel the same way, babe?
And, do ya?
Do you remember how it felt?
'Cause I do
So listen to me, baby"

I look at him again. I noticed that he can't stop looking at me, like I'm the only one in the room. His muscular and tattooed arms strum the electric guitar in time with the rest of his band. He sings into the mic with something in his voice. Purpose? I don't know. Just this time, he's different and I can't register why. I jump in on the chorus. 

"And I'm not tryna ruin your happiness
But darling don't you know that
I'm the only one for ya?
And I'm not tryina ruin your happiness, baby
But darling don't you know that
I'm the only one, yeah?"

I take the next verse, just like we practiced. Only this time I belt the first 'do ya' just like he does every time he sings it alone. He smiles wildly when I do. There's my not-always-so-emotionally-illegible boyfriend.