Hadh...Out of Limit

Chapter 22 : You are a habit!

Zuhaan was trying to understand what happened with him in the hall. He was staring at his wounds. The scene was replaying inside his head, repeatedly, like a CD-player and then stopping, right when Shiza yelled and then replayed again. This was like a stuck CD. It won't go beyond. The CD was blank after that particular moment. Zuhaan's Processing system was Jammed, his sensory register was Shut, it just had stopped registering thoughts it seemed. What would he had done if it was Zaid? Or Ali? Or Rajeev? Or anyone? I would have given them left-right-centre, then why leave her? He was annoyed at himself, for not understanding the strange beating of the chest. There were things that he had experienced, exclusively for her, since he met her. The strangest part of all this was, that he was never angry on her. She never made him loose his cool, and this was the most annoying part.

Zuhaan always lived in black and white, He hated women. That was one thing that was clear to him. he knew what he was suppose to feel and his mind always listened to him until now. He kept telling his mind to be angry, but he just won't feel it, and he instead ended up being annoyed at himself. But only if he knew, that he was directing the wrong organ of the body, this time, it was the Heart that was at work.

As the footsteps were approaching, he was quick enough to lie down. He knew one thing for sure, he needed less of her right now, until he came to terms with the Mind v/s heart tournament. He pulled the sheets, and switched off the lights.

As Shiza entered the Room, she saw Zuhaan sleeping on the couch. This had become a routine since the night of the tragedy. Zuhaan was sleeping on the couch.

She stood their staring at him for a while. She walked up to the bed and slept.

Next morning, was finally a normal one for Shiza and Zuhaan, with no sirens wailing, no uniforms waiting down with a list of questions in the hall. She took a sigh of relief and got up. Shiza, after the morning prayers, sat on the terrace just having a quick recap of whatever had happened. The innocent face of Nazia just did not go away. Zuhaan's wounds, the threat to his life, the way every single person breathing in or around Seraj Villa were shaken up badly in the last few days, "All because of me", Shiza couldn't help but blame herself. Hadn't it been her deal with Mr. Seraj, the marriage would never had taken place. She held herself responsible. She was so engrossed in her thoughts that she did not notice the arrival of Zuhaan on the terrace.

"I need your signatures on some document", said Zuhaan handing her a file and paper.

She, clearly dipped in guilt, took the file and signed the papers. Zuhaan quietly took the papers and was just about to leave when Shiza spoke, "Sorry".

Zuhaan, halted and turned, "Excuse me?"

Shiza gathered all her strength and continued, "It is because of me that everything is happening. Avaan came back because of me", Zuhaan Just glanced down at her and she continued, "Hadn't it was me, all your lives would have been easier", she said and her eyes filled with tears, "Nazia died because of me, you were hurt because of me. All your lives are in danger because of me".

"What's done is done. No use thinking over it", Zuhaan said, trying to be as grumpy as possible

"Yes, you are right, it cannot be undone", said Shiza which again stopped an escaping Zuhaan, "But this doesn't mean that the future has to be this way. It can improve, I mean the situation of the house. Your situation and life"

"How?", asked Zuhaan still facing away

"If you leave me! If we separate", said Shiza, finally giving up on her strength, "All your lives would be easier, without me". Then she paused and continued, "It would be good for you as well, you can have someone better than me. Someone who is a strong not someone like me".
She looked at him and ten continued, "it is difficult to change habits, you will no longer have to alter yours"

"Exactly", said Zuhaan,"you are absolutely right", said he to which Shiza just stared at him teary-eyed, "It is not difficult, but impossible to change a habit", said he then glanced at Shiza from over his shoulder and added, "So quit over thinking", and then left the terrace.

Shiza was quite, she did not know what to respond, "What did he mean?", she asked herself. Shiza could not even process that last statement of Zuhaan. He agreed to her, but did not respond back in a way she expected. "I mean he should be happy right? That is what he ultimately wanted after-all?", then added, "But what did he mean?". This was the only think running in her mind, after Zuhaan left her with the puzzle.

Later, Shiza was talking to Zareen who had been talking frequently to Shiza after the recent happenings.

"I am tired Zaru. I so want to run away from all this" (Shiza)

"Why don't you stay with Mamu for a while?" (Zareen)

"I just dont want to stay here in town. All this, that is happening, I just want to run away from all this" (Shiza)

{Rustling outing}

"Zareen I will talk to you later, I think Zuhaan is here" (Shiza)

After Shiza held the call, Zuhaan entered the room. As soon as he did, she immediately went back to the conversation on the terrace. Shiza was staring and observing Zuhaan, looking for signs and hints. She was expecting a reaction out of Zuhaan after whatever he said on the terrace, but Zuhaan doesn't seem to remember or even be interested at all. He was busy on a call cracking a deal, and was very normal. Zuhaan walked up to the cupboard to view a file and the files fell. Shiza was quick enough to reach there and picked up the files, but was still expecting a reaction, so she gazed at Zuhaan. She unconsciously gazed at him, holding the file and Zuhaan snatched it from her, giving her a sarcastic look. She went back to the couch and sat there, still gazing. Zuhaan caught Shiza looking at him quite a few times, so after he held the call he asked, "Are You okay?", with no expressions, and Shiza replied,

"Yes, I am fine", then decided to test Ali's Hypothesis, "You look Exhausted."

"Yes, I am indeed, very exhausted", then grabbing a towel said, "I will take a shower and sleep, you sleep; you don't want to be late again tomorrow, do you?", said he directing her towards the bed again with a expressionless cold tone.