Raphangelo oneshots

Not from a song lol

By: ME!

Raphael Hamato was a normal American. Or, as normal as he could be at least. He drank beer, grilled barbecues, and was healthy. He had a loving wife whom he had nicknamed Mona Lisa, and he loved her back.

Well, that's what he told himself.

Mona Lisa couldn't have children. She was a mutation, and was unable to bear any eggs. She had suggested to Raphael that they adopt. He wouldn't.

"Don't you want children to claim as your own?!" She demanded in her booming voice.

"I-I can't..." Raph held his head.

"Why?" Mona Lisa made to grab his hand, but he flinched away.

"Mona..." He sighed. "We-we need a divorce."

She gasped and stepped backwards. "A divorce?!" She couldn't believe it, but she had seen the signs. He was becoming so distant lately... And-

"I apologize, Mona." His eyes were filled with tears. Not because he was sad, but because he had finally accepted who he was. "I know that you've been messing around with Sal, so... I guess I will have to admit, that... I'm gay."

Mona Lisa just stared at him, expression blank. "You're... Gay? How-how do you know?"

"I've known for a while." Raph sighed deeply. "Since High School. I was messing around with a friend of mine... We just wanted to know why some people could be like that... And, well, I like being with guys. Way more than girls. I-I really tried to be normal."

"It-it's okay." Mona placed a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay. And I must apologize, too. I should not have been with Sal..."

"Well, now that we're divorcing, and on good terms... I guess, you can be with him?" Raph suggested, although he still wasn't happy with the idea that Mona had been cheating. But for the moment, he was perfectly happy.

"Maybe." Mona Lisa nodded.

That night, Mona left to go on a date with Sal, and Raph went to the nearest gay club.

Once he was there, he immediately felt out of place. Yeah, the men were hot as fuck, but... Why was a 29 year old man in a club?! God, he was gonna be made fun of-

"Yo!" A young male bumped into him. "Sorry, bro. Didn't see ya there." He looked right into his eyes, and his jaw dropped. "Uh..."

Raph just smiled. "You're okay. Um, my name is Raphael?"

"Michelangelo." The younger replied. "But, uh, Mikey is cool too. Can-can I get you a drink?" His face was red.

Raph only laughed. "You look to be about 15, kid. I'm two times your age."

Mikey huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. "Actually, I'm 25, thank you."

"Wait. Really?" Raph rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "I-I uh-"

"It's chill man." Mikey beamed. "So, can I getcha a drink?"

"Sure." Raph smiled at him. "But I'm buying."

Mikey laughed, already really liking this guy. "Alright, but I tip."

"Deal." Raph nodded and took Mikey's hand and led him to the bar.

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Raph smiled as he watched his ex-wife walk up to the alter. He witnessed as she married Sal.

"I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Sal Commander!"

"Y'gthgba Commander...." The shorter boy next to Raph whispered. "What a cool name."

Raphael smiled sweetly at him. "Mona Lisa Commander. And Michelangelo Hamato. How does that sound?"

Mikey's face bloomed red. "H-Hamato?"

"Or Yoshi. That's up to you, I would be willing to take your name. Or both! Michelangelo and Raphael Hamato-Yoshi. Or would it be better as Yoshi-Hamato?"

Mikey grabbed his hand. "We'll figure that out later, Raphie. Come on, I need a drink!"

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Today was the day. The big day.

Leonardo was Raphael's best man. Donatello was Mikey's. Raph and Leo's father, Splinter, walked Mikey down the aisle, as his father was against gay marriage.

Mona Lisa and Sal happily watched. Along with April, Raph's old friend Casey, LH, Mondo, and so many others.

At the end of the ceremony, Raph was surprised when Mikey dipped him. They kissed, sealing their fate.

"I love you, Michelangelo Hamato-Yoshi."

"And I love you, Raphael Hamato-Yoshi."