Never Letting Go / Solby

23

sam's pov
(thursday night)
"bye. i love you," i mumbled, kissing colby before he had to go home.
"i love you more. i'll be here at 8am tomorrow," he kissed me one more time before he left. i sighed and closed the door behind him, already missing him. i was gonna get a shit sleep tonight.
"sam, darling, i have a man coming over for dinner this evening, and i was just wondering if you could wear something.. ya know.. normal tonight?" my mom asked, obviously not thinking about how that whole sentence offended me.
"what do you mean, 'normal'?" i scoffed, knowing exactly what she meant. no skirts or crop tops. no girly clothes.
"c'mon sam, don't play dumb. you know what i mean," she looked pained, but also fed up.
"no. i will wear what i normally wear. what if things get serious with this guy? i'm not just gonna stop wearing girly clothes just because you don't want to scare away this guy. if he doesn't like it, then he can fuck off. how could you even ask me that? you're saying if he doesn't accept your own son, you'd still be willing to be with him?" i snapped, scoffing.
"i.. sam, please just hear me out," she said as i stormed up the stairs.
"no! i won't hear you out! you're embarrassed of me!" i yelled, slamming my bedroom door. i leaned against my door, sliding to the floor with a sob. that one sob lead to several others. within seconds, i was a crying mess on the floor. i sniffled and stood back up, looking over at my bed. there was a folded note on there, along with something folded up. i walked over and sat down, unfolding the note.

'i love you. i knew you'd appreciate it. wear it with pride, baby. again, i love you.
- colbs 🤍'

i sniffled and let out a small giggle, unfolding the item. it was a black hoodie that read 'why be racist, sexist, homophobic or transphobic when you could just be quiet?'. i smiled sadly and smelled it, sighing as it smelled exactly like him. i made a plan in my head, to wear the most feminine outfit i could find and then spend the night downstairs. really rub it in to my mom and to the man that i was gay. i cried even more thinking about the possible outcomes of that. but it didn't matter to me. i was going to do it. i pulled my phone out of my pocket and rang colby, tears still streaming down my face. my own mother was embarrassed of me.
(s-sam c-colby)
c- hey!
s- hey (sniffle)
c- what's wrong? are you crying?
s- i-i- yeah. my m-mom's embarrassed of me b-being g-gay, a-and she's got a g-guy coming over a-and she wants me to d-dress quote-on-q-quote normal, a-and she only said that b-
c- hey, hey, you don't have to explain everything so quickly, i can barely understand what you're saying. slow down, breathe, calm yourself down. it's going to be ok. whatever it is, it's going to be ok.
s- (deep breathing) i think i'm o-ok. my mom has a guy coming over for dinner tonight, and she asked me if i could wear something quote-on-quote normal. i said no and that she just wanted to not scare off the man, and she asked me to hear her out but she's just embarrassed of me, my own mom is embarrassed of me. (crying again)
c- baby, that's horrible! are you doing anything about it?
s- i'm gonna wear like the shortest skirt i can find and the most feminine things i can find. and the hoodie. thanks for that, by the way. (giggle)
c- sounds like a plan. and you're very welcome.
s- (giggle) i love you. and could you stay on call whilst he's here? i don't wanna have to face him without you, even if you're not here in person.
c- yeah, of course. anything for you, lover boy.
s- shut up (giggle)
c- how rude of you, lover boy! i'm kidding. i love you.
s- i love you more. (giggle) switch to facetime, i'm gonna get dressed.
c- that's a sight for sore eyes (chuckle).
s- (scoff).

...

if i die don't forget me