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| sunday october 4 3:32 PM |
"i think we stir it now?" nia questions as she looks down at the directions for mac and cheese. she held nothing but confusion all through out her expression. nia has never been a cook... ever. she's the last person you'd want to have make you something to eat if it involves a stove or stove top. thankfully, i'm here today to help her and save everyone from having to pretend like the food is good....again. the amount of times we've had to act like it's good is actually kind of sad, but we do it for her so we manage. i do have to say at least she's improved a lot over the years. "no we just stirred it." i shake my head with a small laugh before glancing over at jack. he was already looking over at me while the other three boys were fixated on watching the football game. a smile creeps onto my face before i look down at my hands, feeling my cheeks heat up and a certain type of energy rush through me. i don't think he'd ever not make me blush just by looking over at me. even when we weren't talking, he still did it to me... it was the smallest bit, he still had that affect on me. he probably knew it as well. it's hard for me to hide it because it's always so damn obvious when it happens. i'm twenty, this shouldn't still be happening... should it?
"i saw that." nia smirks over at me causing my heart beat to speed up. "saw what?" i ask, trying to play it cool, knowing damn well she definitely knows what is going on. she always does, so i have to try my absolute best to keep her from knowing. jack and i agreed on not letting anyone know about us for a little bit. we want things to calm down some before we let them know what's going on between us. we've been trying our best for the past week to hold it together. there have been many times that we have almost blew the whole thing and had to come clean about it. i've practically sat down on his lap and had to pretend like it was an accident and we've almost kissed in front of them at least five times, those were hard to come back from. we just want this to go perfectly. "i saw it." she shrugs, being blunt with the whole thing. i furrow my eyebrows and she laughs some before grabbing the spoon and stirring the noodles for everyone's mac and cheese. "what?" i laugh, once again trying to play it off. "you and jack, just come on tell me what's going on. this whole week has been off between you two. you're both either acting a little too close or acting like you barely know each other. something isn't right." she shakes her head, talking like she knew exactly what was going on between the two of us. she definitely did. all of the boys are oblivious to the matter, but nia? oh no. she can figure anything out. anything.
i let out a small sigh and look over at jack again. he was standing up with both of the boys. all of their hands were in the air, cheering someone on as they were rushing the ball. they looked like they didn't have a care in the world, just enjoying each other's company and the game that's on the tv. i look back over at nia and she was still staring at me. i could feel it the whole time i was looking over at the boys. if i could tell anyone itd be nia, but can't can'ttell anyone. jack and i agreed on keeping this to ourselves until we knew exactly what was happening with us and until we know how far we're going to take it. if i told nia i'd feel so bad that i did after telling jack i wouldn't tell anyone. "no, everything's perfect...i guess it's just my feelings" i shrug, not lying... well technically. it does involve my feelings and everything right now is absolutely perfect. no flaws what so ever. i mean id love to tell nia any and everything about what's happening, she's my very best friend and has been ever since we were in kindergarten. we've been inseparable for the longest time, but it's a promise i made to jack.
"you haven't told him yet?!" her eyes widen. i sigh to my self, knowing i'm just digging the hole deeper and deeper by not telling her. the guilt will just eat at me for not being completely honest with my best friend.. my eyes wander over to jack. he was still focused on the game... i think this is the first time i've ever seen him watch the game somewhere that isn't at his parents house. in a way, i kind of feel bad for asking him if he wanted to watch it over here with everyone else. i don't know if they're having something at katherine and david's house today anyways, but he's always there for the games. that's his place to go. i shouldn't have asked him, i should have just let him be. "i told him i missed him and that's all the information you're getting right now." i say quickly and quietly but loud enough for her to hear clearly. her eyes widen again as i reach for the spoon and begin to stir our noodles. "you did not just say that's all the information i'm getting." she raises her eyebrows at me, clearly becoming frustrated that i wasn't going to give her any more information on what had happened between jack and i. "oh but i did." i nod, smirking slightly at her. i let out a small laugh at how her and chris would always do this to me back in high school. i stuck my tongue out at her and she smiles some. "fine, but just answer one more thing please." she practically begs like a little kid. i laugh some and continue to look at nia, waiting for her to go on whit what she was about to ask me. "are things still good between you two?" she asks me. i know that if i didn't answer shed absolutely go crazy. so i shrug, just to mess with her at first. she glares at me and throws her head back some. "seriously? that's all i get c'mon cin!" she whines making me laugh even harder. "i'm kidding! yes things are perfectly fine." i nod, giving her a hint of what's going on with out actually saying it. her eyes brighten as if a certain switch had been tampered with in her head, next comes her wide smile and then a few small jumps to show how excited she was. i hold my pointer finger against my lips, signifying that it had to be a secret. she instantly nodded and acted as if she were zipping her lips with a smirk. "i expect to hear the whole story soon." she whispers, turning the burner off. "i promise" i wink at her before looking back over at jack with a smile.
