You & I

Niall

Niall

I knew Millie only took Harry so that she could get away from me. Honestly though,  i don't blame her. I cheated on her. If I was her i'd have left me by now and gone off and had sex with as many people as possible just to piss me off. Obviously. she's nothing like me.

admire her for sticking around. I mean we say a sentence max to eachother a day but she still hasn't left me yet. every second I'm just waiting for her to say 'i can't do this anymore' and leave.

I'm trying to give her space, but then i feel like it's to much space and then i feel like I'm being pushy so I end up saying the wrong thing at the wrong time and it just makes this all so much worse.

All the boys had left so i was just sitting on the couch cradling Duke as he slowly drifted to sleep.

Is Duke going to be my only child with mills? or my only child for that matter?

Millie and i had talked about expanding our family whilst Duke was on his way. She wanted 5 kids as she came from a big family and I only wanted 2 or 3 . We even talked names if we ever had anymore.

I Took a sleeping Duke into My bedroom and lay him on the bed.  i turned to my phone and started scrolling through twitter until my phone rang.

"hello?" I said

"Hey Niall it's sara. I got a knew phone so that why you haven't got my number before you ask" I laughed quitely being cautious not to wake the baby.

"is everything okay?" I asked

"well I was wondering if Harry had left yet. He said Millie was talking him home at 6ish. its 7:30 now and both of them aren't answering their phones"

"they left just before 6. Maybe traffic? "

"not nearly two hour traffic Niall"

"i guess. Do you want me to look for them or something? "

"Give it 30 more minutes yeah and if they're not here you can come over and we'll look" sara said

we chatted for a few more minutes until I was getting another call.

"Ni-ni-niall" A shaky voice muttered on the other end of the call.

"who is this?"

"It's harry"

"Where are you And millie? Sara and I have been worried sick."

"Niall we got in an accident."

Then everything just stopped. Tears dripped down my cheeks. I picked Duke up and ran downstairs into the car.

"Where are you?"

"We're at St . Marys.  Niall hurry please"

"I'm already on my way. Take care of her Harry please.  Shes everything to me"

I hung up and drove. How bad was it? Is she dead? these questions kept running through my mind.  This was all my fault.

once I arrived at the hospital i took Duke in his carseat and ran inside. I didn't know where to go. Everything was just a blur. I looked around and saw harry sitting on a chair looking a mess.

"Where is she?" I said approaching him.

His sad eyes looked up at me tears falling out of them. "I'm so sorry Niall" his voice cracked.

"is she dead?"

"Shes in surgery."

"How bad was it?"

"bad. She's bleeding like inside of her body. Something ruptured and its really hard to fix.  This is all my fault. I should just have drove myself home. Niall forgive me please"

"This isn't your fault mate. don't blame yourself. Did someone crash into you?"

"there was alot of traffic and we werent moving and then all of a sudden a truck lost control and was crashing into loads of cars. we were right in the middle of it all."

" Oh Haz im so sorry" He was obviously in shock. He had cuts all over his face and arms some with stitches in. "And you're alright yeah?"

He nodded and i took a seat next to him "She told you didnt she?" I asked

he nodded again and put his arm round me

Tears fell from my eyes. "I never meant it you know. it sort of just happened."

"Niall I'm not talking to you about this please."

I took a deep breath and held tight onto my baby. Nothing had really sunk in yet. everything was just surreal. My wife, My bestfriend, my absolute everything could be dying and dying hating me.

"she dosnt hate you Niall"

I look up at Harry and half smile.

We sat in silence for about 45 minutes until a doctor came to update us.

"She's out of surgery and in the ICU in a stable condition. We've went in using a minimaly invasive technique that will leave a small scar if not a tiny little dot."

I sigh in relfif. "when can I see her?"

"You can see her now"  The Doctor said and guided Harry and I to the ICU ward.

As we walked up to her room Harry Said he'd wait outside until I was ready for him to come in.

"Call Sara and El for me please. Tell them to come here right away. " I asked Harry before I went in with Duke. He nodded in responding and a took a deep breath.  I opened the door and suddenly wished I hadn't.

Her pale, sickly face remains still yet so beautiful. I touch her soft cheek with my shaking hand. Tears fall down my face as the overwhelming feeling of guilt anger and sadness take over me. "wake up damn it! wake up! I'll stay here as long as it takes just please wake up!" even the bright hospital lights shine brightly through my blurry tears. I lay my head down at my Baby and cover my weary eyes as I cry, letting my  sobs full the room as Duke lay silent unkown to the dangers of the world. My sleeping beauty, my world, my home, my everything. She is what gets me up in the morning, she is the sun shining through the dark, she is the only real happiness that I can say I've felt before. I cant lose her. A rustle of the bed covers brings my attention, I move my hands away from my eyes, the darkness leaving my eyesight. The fluorescent hospital lights blind me at first and cause me to squint. My eye sight clears. Millies Light brown/blonde hair shifts as her eyes flutter open and her head moves away from the lights. She squints her face but then stares directly in my eyes, hers growing wider. Her mouth moves slowly, breaking into tear

"Niall" she says. A smile escaping her plump lips. I kiss her hand that i was holding.

"oh princess"