greed•y - billie eilish

thirty three

finley

"Forty eight... forty nine, fifty... fifty two.... fifty three, fifty fou-"

"What the hell are you going on about??" I asked Billie as our driver had finally made its way towards my little town, I tried my best to relax before entering the gates of hell I called my home but Billie had other plans of keeping me from doing so.

"I'm counting the trucks." She muttered in a 'duh' like tone as if I was stupid not to know why she was counting.

"The fuck people need so many trucks for?" She asked leaning in closer to the window her soft breaths creating a small fog to her window "I don't know Bil, it's Texas." I chuckled her eyebrows creasing at my answer "So, they are ugly and built weird." She mumbled her curious eyes looking over everything we passed.

"Don't say that in front of anyone here they'll rip your head off." I laughed earning a laugh from her also "I'll except that as a challenge." She teased wiggling her eyebrows humorously.

I chucked rolling my eyes playfully as I watched us get closer into my familiar neighborhood the feeling of dread taking over when I saw my house come into view.

A frown dropped on my face at the heart sinking feeling, going home was supposed to feel good and happy but it never felt like that here, it was like there was a constant cloud glooming over my house.

"Hey.." "You okay?" Billie asked softly her hand falling on my knee bringing me out of my head, I looked up with a soft sigh shrugging my shoulders lightly "I don't want to be here." I whispered the car coming to a stop in my driveway.

Billie sighed softly her hand moving from my knee to intertwine her fingers with mine "We're gonna fix that, I promise I'm not leaving until you're happy." She told me, I opened my mouth to respond shaking my head to protest "No I promise Finley, I'm not leaving you just so you can go back to being miserable I'm not letting that happen." She muttered giving my hand a tight squeeze before letting it go the door of the suv being opened by the driver.

I sighed once my shoes met the pavement of my driveway the dreadful Texas heat hitting me in the face as soon as I stepped out of the car.

Billie thanked the driver with a smile as he unloaded our luggage my shaky hand reaching for the handle of my suitcase before I let out a breath rolling it up the walkway to the front door.

The door swung open before I could even reach for the handle my brothers eyes meeting mine watching a smile brighten on his face "Hey kid, I missed you." He greeted bringing me into a hug that nearly took the breath out of me.

My nervousness slightly faded with him here to greet me I wasn't expecting him to be home from work when I got here.

"Hey Billie, thanks for doing this for her really I don-" Alex started before being cut off completely "Don't thank me for that shit dude I wanted to, Finley deserves it." She told him waving her hand to the side like it wasn't a problem.

I wasn't going to lie and say I wasn't nervous for both Billie and my brother to be in the same room, I really didn't have a clue what they couldn't talked about when it came to me and I honestly didn't want to know.

"My room is that way." I whispered tugging the heavy suitcase with me into the house with Billie following close behind me, her presence made me nervous I didn't want her to see or be in one of my most vulnerable places, the bedroom behind that door was a place I hated being I hated walking in there every day to just sleep, cry and be miserable day in and day out yet that room was a comfort to me in a fucked up way I hated to even think about.

The frown on my face was evident the moment I opened the door and walked in my eyes searching over the familiarity of the room yet it felt strangely foreign at the same time.

I turned my gaze to Billie that looked around my room with a blank expression her eyes looking over the plain bed frame and drawers the little childhood trinkets catching her attention the most.

"When was the last time you redecorated this room?" She asked setting down her bags on top of my bed softly her footsteps carrying to the pictures of my parents on the night stand.

"Um.." "I-I don't know, I guess I haven't." I told her bringing the tip of my thumb between my lips out of nervousness.

Her eyes looked down at my notebook sitting on my bedside table where I had left it an immediate stomach dropping feeling hitting me when her fingers traced over it.

"What's this?" She asked reaching forward to open it, my hand slammed down on it before she could even take a peak my heart hammering in my chest as I held it close to me her eyes looking up in shock and confusion a curious look glimmering in her eyes when she looked back down at it in my hands.

"It's private." I muttered quickly opening the bedside drawer to stuff it in there closing it with a soft bang that made the lamp shake a bit.

She nodded before looking away noticing her cheeks that were now a pinkish hue.

"Where do you want to start?" "We can go through anything you want." She asked messing with the lining of my down comforter the diamonds on her rings shimmering with the sunlight peaking through the window.

"Umm.." "The closet maybe?" "I don't want to start to heavy if that's okay." I mumbled the nervousness of her seeing all of my things and personal belongings I've kept over the years, I felt vulnerable with her in my room like she jumped into my bubble I wasn't ready to pop yet.

"We can do whatever you want Finnie, I'm not pressuring you to do anything." She told me seriously, I knew she could sense my mood change, she could tell there was something off about the way I was acting.

I felt as if I was dragging myself to my closet opening the doors revealing the many things I had randomly stacked together in a messy way my mind was overwhelmed looking at everything at once not having a clue of where to start.

"If you put the different things together in piles you'll be able to know where to put it al-"

"Can we just.. wait for minute?" "I don't want to start right now, I'm tired." I sighed her eyes meeting mine when I turned around, she nodded slowly brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

My stomach twisted when her arms reached out in front of her sitting down on my bed, I smiled halfway running towards her she laughed at my sprint a huff passing her lips when my legs were already around her waist and my face hidden in her neck "I love you, ya know." She mumbled only making my smile brighten.

"I know." I giggled with a cheeky smile her eyebrow arching when she pulled away her eyes narrowed, I laughed rolling my eyes playfully "I love you too."

"You better." She huffed pulling me back towards her I laughed when I fell back onto the bed her arms locked around me tightly not letting me go for a second, my eyes fell shut at how warm she was pressed against me her face now resting on my chest "Billie." I mumbled softly feeling her arms hold me tighter "Hm." She mumbled softly her eyes shut closed "Can we take a nap?" I asked running my fingers through her hair, I smiled when her leg locked with mine the way she always did when we cuddled "Mhm." She softly hummed back a soft sigh escaping her lips I shivered feeling her hot breath against my skin her warmth relaxing me making me realize how exhausted I really was until I fell asleep.