Poetry and Thoughts

more

I did more

I should stop

The more I have

The more noticeable they are

But why can't I stop

It feels to good

It's a release

But I have to stop

I can't let them see

I remember back in high school when I did it

Lexi saw

She hit me

But she never stopped me

Maybe if she had stopped me then maybe I wouldn't be doing it now

No I would of just gone to a mental hospital faster

Sometimes I think to what Hannah and Jessika would think

What would they do

It's scary to think about

I've done it so much I'm surprised they haven't noticed

I'm surprised my family hasn't noticed

But they don't pay much mind to me anyways

The one person I'd let know besides you is Alex but he's also the one I want to keep it from the most

He cares so much for me and I'm scared of what will happen

How would he react?

Would it hurt him?

Would he report it?

Would he tell Jessika?

I hope not

I never want Jessika or Hannah to find out

I hope he doesn't find out either. I'm just less worried about him finding out cause he's in Maine

But Jessika comes over everyday almost and she hasn't found out yet so let's hope it keeps going

There is a chance of Alex finding out. And honestly he might find out when I see him in Maine

If I go alone he wants me to come stay with him so I don't have to save so much money

I might stay a few nights with him anyway

It depends how hot his room is if I can cover my arms or not

I'll probably have to wear a tank top so I don't over heat

I'm just scared

But then I don't care when I'm doing it