One of the Last Jedi

My parents

I track down the mountain after Meditating this afternoon for the night to then set in knowing it is time for bed, I then stop feeling the connection with Kylo Ren yet again, it is quite getting on my nerves right now he is always there judging me or what I chose to go to, "I'd rather not do this now." I say for him to sigh on that as well thinking he does not like our connection at all, "Yeah, me too." Ren says for me gulp in knowing I have to question it because whenever I tried when we were children he would have a temper tantrum and storm away he can't do it to me now, "Why did you hate your father?" I question but when I turn to him I go wide-eyed. I picked the worst time for this or someone did for me to advert my eyes away from his body with his top half uncovered, "Do you have something? A cowl or something you can put on?" I question for him to keep standing there for me to cross my arms over my chest knowing that he always made me flustered when he did these things or maybe when I accidentally walked into his room unannounced as he was changing, "Why did you hate your father? Give me an honest answer." I question for him to look at me with those eyes for me to press my lips into a thin line why will he not speak on it at all, "You had a father who loved you... who gave a damn about you." I say knowing I am upset because Han loved his son but I had no father or no mother at all to love me like they loved Ben Solo I was always alone in that department, "I didn't hate him." Ben says for me to feel like I am breaking slowly right now on how much I needed a family at that time and Ben, Han and Leia were not it at all or even Luke, "Then why?" I question for him to watch me carefully knowing he can feel my pain right now it is eating me alive like a bug a carcass, "Why, what? Why what? Say it." Kylo questions for me to lick my lips not liking that I have to say it out in the open, I was not a person who says it like it is, only a person to bottle it up for later, "Why did you... Why did you kill him? I don't understand." I sob out for me to look down hating that I feel so vulnerable when I am with this monster of a man, "No? Your parents threw you like garbage." Kylo Ren says for me to look up at him with my blue eyes waterlogged from my sadness I am feeling right now and he is driving it in deeper like a knife in my heart, "They didn't!" I hiss for him to watch me with those eyes that I grew to hate after time, "They did. But you can't stop needing them. It is your greatest weakness. You're looking for them everywhere... in Han Solo... now in Skywalker. Did he tell you what happened that night?" Kylo Ren says for me to gulp in knowing only parts of it but I do know that Ben Solo turned to the dark side of the force and he lost me, "Yes. He did." I say for him to watch me closely on that knowing that I lie because Luke only told me parts of it not the whole story because I was not the one to confront Ren I was with R2 cleaning the Astro droid, "No. He sensed my power... as he senses yours. And he feared it." Kylo Ren says for me to shake my head at his words my master does not fear me not then or now, "Liar." I say to then lick my lips because he was the one that betrayed as all, his family, his master, those children and me his love. 

He steps forward looking down onto me with me sensing something in him, something that has not been in him since long ago, "Let the past die. Kill it if you have to. It's the only way to become what you're meant to be." he says for me to look at him with me breathing slowly pulling my connection back to the force with peace running through me as I look up at Ren, "I will never be like you" I say for me to then walk away knowing the connection is gone but I feel it in my heart that my blood is connected to the darkness and it will open me up or drown me in water below. While returning to the huts I see Rey going to the dark part of the island which makes me stop to tilt my head as I am watching the girl knows what she is planning to do, I looked for it too so long ago. My family but going there only gives you false hope, I know my family will not return for me, they were not meant to be with me at all. I go in that direction for me to breath in as I see her climbing out looking quite sad on what she did not find in the black hole of darkness, "Rey" I say for her to look at me, "I know how you feel" I say for her to look at me and then down towards the hole seeing tears on her cheeks, "I looked for them, my parents" I say for her to look at me with wonder on the subject of my mystery parents, "return to your hut" I say for her to watch me carefully on that knowing she wishes to know what I am to do, "go, or I'll tell Luke that you were sneaking around" I whisper for her to breathe in smiling small to leave for me to watch her leave then jump landing in the water of the black hole to swim up onto the ledge for me to breath in knowing I should not venture in here but I hope to find my parents. 

I breath lightly touching the mirror for me to look behind me at my selves knowing it is an illusion to the eyes for me to breath in stepping forward-looking into the mirror with hope, "show my parents, please" I whisper into the void knowing myself will step forward like the times before. I stare back at myself for me to close my eyes knowing the truth that I will have to find soon. I sat in my hut with a blanket on me and Kylo Ren with me, "I should have felt trapped or frightened. But no. It didn't go on forever, I knew it was leading somewhere. And that in the end, it would show me what I came to see." I tell him for the knight of Ren to watch me as I grip my hands together wishing I had clue on my parent's names or favorite foods but nothing, nothing at all to help me, "I thought I'd find answers here. I was wrong. I've never felt so alone" I continue as we are sitting there for me to breathe in looking down at my hands with sadness in my eyes knowing I always look but I never find anything, "You're not alone." Ben says for me to look upon that to smile small on that knowing that he knew the words to say to me in times when I felt sad or alone in the galaxy when I needed someone to help me with the darkness, "Neither are you. It isn't too late." I say for him to look at me with those smooth eyes that always took care of me when I was a child. I look towards my hand to then slowly bring it out from the blanket to hold it out to Kylo to then look at him as he takes his black glove off to begin to reach across to me making me look at him with my blue eyes wishing for his touch.