Yours, Now and Forever Book #2(A Jordan Knight Fanfiction)

Ch. 17

Vivian called Jordan as soon as she dropped Orlando off at the airport. She hadn't been able to stop thinking about him since he'd left her dad's house. He didn't answer. Vivian thought about just stopping by his place, but decided that wasn't a good idea. So she drove home.

Her parents and the kids had gone out to get some dinner and to see a movie. Vivian enjoyed the empty house, a little time alone might be just what she needed. She had a lot to think about.

She needed to think about Orlando. She loved him, but it felt like the love she had for him when they were friends. She didn't love him like she'd loved Jordan, like she still loved Jordan. How was she supposed to do this? She couldn't just leave Orlando for Jordan. She couldn't just tell Orlando he wasn't the one for her. But she had always known Jordan was her forever. He was her home. Everything was so confusing right now.

Vivian was emotionally exhausted. She knew what her heart wanted. She even knew what her head wanted. Her body was also on the same page. But her conscience was making her feel bad. It was telling her she was going to hurt Orlando and it was wrong. Vivian decided she didn't want to think about it anymore, instead she changed into her pajamas and went to sleep.

Vivian had no idea how long she'd been sleeping when someone crawled through her window and woke her up. She almost screamed, but she heard Jordan say, "Viv, its just me. A little help here?" Vivian reached over, took his hand and helped him drag himself the rest of the way through her window.

"Fuck I'm getting too old for this shit."

Vivian couldn't help but laugh at him. She goes back to her bed and gets back under the covers. She pulls back the covers and pats on the mattress next to her, inviting Jordan to join her. He takes off his shoes and crawls under the covers with her.

They lay next to each other, both laying on their sides facing one another. Neither says anything for a while, they just stare at each other. Finally Jordan asks her what's on her mind.

"J, I'm so confused. I can't lie, I want our life together back. I miss you so much. I feel whole again when I'm near you. My heart is so full with you laying here with me. This week has been the happiest I've been in so long. I need you in my life Jordan. I can't keep living without you." Tears run down her cheeks, she's finally following her heart. She has to leave Orlando and be with Jordan again. She doesn't feel like there's any other choice for her anymore.

Jordan reaches over and wipes the tears from her cheeks. His hand goes to the back of her neck and he pulls her to him. His lips touch hers and she melts into him. She falls asleep in his arms. He falls asleep holding her against his chest. They both feel happy and content, like they were right where they belonged.

Vivian is woken up by her bedroom door opening up, "Hey Momma are you in here?" She hears her daughter's voice just before the light is turned on. Then she hears her daughter gasp, "Daddy? Momma?" The light goes off and she hears her daughter giggle as she closes the door. Vivian smiles and thinks about the conversation she'll be having with her daughter later, and probably her son and her parents.

Vivian lays there watching Jordan sleep, her thoughts are all over the place. Vivian feels at ease being here with him. It feels right. She feels like this is where she belongs. But she's not sure what they are doing. She knows Jordan asked her to stay, but did he mean it? Did he really want her to stay? Or did he say that because he knew she couldn't stay, because she's married? She wonders what he'd say if she said yes she'd stay. Would he be happy? Would he freak out?

Vivian's thoughts are interrupted when she hears Jordan laughing. "What's so funny?"

"The look on your face. You look like you're trying to figure out how to achieve world peace or something. You look so serious. What's on your mind?"

"Us."

"Us? What about us?" He reaches over and brushes her hair off her forehead.

"What the fuck are we doing? What do I tell the kids?"

"I don't know what we're doing. I know what I'd like to do. And there's no reason to rush to telling the kids anything. At least not until we decide what we're doing. I don't want to confuse them."

"Well....while you were sleeping, LaLa kind of walked in here looking for me and she saw us."

"Oh. Damnit. Then I guess we just tell her we were just discussing things. Trying to figure some stuff out."

Vivian leans forward so her lips almost touch his ear, "What stuff do we say we're figuring out?" She runs the tip of her tongue along his earlobe. He shivers. She kisses his ear and blows gently. He shivers again.

"Vivian can I ask you something?"

"Of course J you know you can ask me anything."

He draws in a deep breath. "Do you still love me?"

"Yes." There was no hesitation at all in her answer. No thinking about it first. She just gave the answer from her heart. And seeing the smile on his face now, she knew it was the right answer.
She loved him. She'd always loved him. And she knew with everything she was or would ever be, that she would always love him. He was her home and her heart belonged to him. She knew without a doubt she belonged with him.

"Yes?"

"Yes, I still love you. I never stopped loving you. I don't think I'd know how not to love you. You've got my heart. The last five years has been torture, seeing you and not being able to touch you. Not being able to feel your touch. I've dreamed about what life would have been like had I made a different decision about the movie premiere."

"What do you mean?"

"Tim wanted me to go to the movie premiere with you, keep up the appearance we were still together. For the movie's sake. I agreed to go with you, but Orlando got upset about it. So instead I went with him. I've had this recurring dream since that night. In the dream, I went with you. We watched the movie together and then we kissed and everything worked out for us. I had the dream again the night before I came to Boston, it shook me up a bit this time, because I finally realized I wanted the life I had in the dream. I realized finally that I wanted you back. I wanted our life back. So what do you say?"

"What do I say about what?"

"Can I have it back? Can I have my life back?"

He answered her with a smile and a very passionate kiss. They broke her dad's number one rule that night as they very quietly made love.