behind the scenes ! junhao

04

AFTER school Jun made his way home safely, heading up the second story of the building he removes his backpack. Tossing it to the corner of his room carelessly as the only thing that came to mind was becoming undressed as his school uniform was far from comfy. Removing his tie, he lays it on his desk and begins to undo his buttons. "Where's my shirt from this morning.." He questions to himself before removing the white collared top, he looks around his room and finds it near the side of the bed. Walking over to grab it, he looks out his window and makes eye contact with Minghao. It was clear that the other male realized what he was in the middle of doing, but Jun didn't mind and opened his window hastily to wave at him.

Minghao, on the other hand, stepped away from his window for a second to slap himself in the face, scolding his own self as he caught Jun in the middle of changing. It was Saturday all over again just the roles were reversed. He knew Jun was waiting for him to open his window, so in order for no ruckus to erupt, he decides to give him what he wants. Unlocking his window, he pushes it open to find Jun still waving. "Put on your shirt you moron." He scolds, pointing to his undone dress shirt. "This is not appropriate for my eyes."

"Ah, sorry." He apologizes, beginning to remove the shirt in order to slip on the other one.

"Not in front of me!" Minghao screams, he covers his own mouth as he realizes he was too loud. Jun who's eyes widen from his tone, only bursts out into laughter as he couldn't believe what he just heard. "Please get dressed! This is weird..."

"You're the one making it weird," Jun states, slipping on the shirt over his head. He removes the underlayer by using a different technique, this way he can take off his clothes without Minghao and his eyescomplaining. "I change in front of my team a lot, it doesn't bother me."

"Well, it bothers me.." He mutters, well - sort of true. Minghao would admit that Jun was attractive, from what he could see he did have good body proportions. Overall, the boy was handsome, though he had a great face, Jun's personality threw the younger off majorly. "Shouldn't you be doing your work?"

"Shouldn't you be doing yours? Staring at me like a weirdo. I feel violated."

"You said it didn't bother you!" Minghao retorts, confused by volleyball player's words.

"Oh, so you're gonna do it again?"

He couldn't believe what he was hearing, the ravenette groans before responding to his question, "Jun that's not what I meant. You know that,—"

"I really don't. We don't know each other that well." Jun cuts off, Minghao gulps as his words were correct. They knew nothing about each other, except for their names and their appearances. Minghao knew Jun was the academy's volleyball captain, while Jun knew Minghao was against the idea of himself conversing with the younger boy. "But, I want to be friends with you. Only if you want of course."

"Jun..." He didn't know how to explain, or if he even should. Having Jun worry for him would stress him out to the max. He couldn't even bare Soonyoung and Wonwoo having slight concern. "It's complicated. You and I..we shouldn't talk to each other." There he goes again, putting up the act like what he did with Soonyoung. He acts annoyed, angered within the moment of speaking about their interaction but. Minghao was smarter than that and was aware of the fact that Jun was a nice guy. It was just — he was worried about what other people would think about Jun if he started acting 'weird' and buddy-buddy with a younger individual who has no connection to any sort of popular group. Also, he was afraid of his parents figuring out about their blossoming relationship if Minghao decided to accept his request. There were too many things to worry about. "It's complicated..."

"That's no worries." Jun states, reassuring the boy immediately as Minghao displays a small frown. "Don't be sad, I'm not mad about it. As long as you don't hate me then I'm okay."

I don't hate you. The phrase blares in Minghao's mind, but he was accustomed to the concept of pushing away people who wanted to learn more about him. It was just how he was molded.

"I think I should start working," Minghao tells Jun, "you should continue changing and work as well."

"Can we work together? You know, sit in front of our windows and talk. Wouldn't that be fun!"

"I'll—" Minghao thinks about it for a bit, he's never really had study sessions with friends or had a companion by his side when he did his work. Usually, it would be an older tutor or mentor, not a student near his age. "I'll get in trouble.." He informs, Jun doesn't understand how that'll cause any problems as the activity they'd be engaging in was academic. "It's complicated, I'll be going now. Bye." As he wraps up his words, he quickly reaches for the window's handle and shuts it. Jun is left again, staring at Minghao's window without an explanation.

But, it was okay. Because everyone had their own individual lives that were different. Minghao may have house rules that he had to obey in order to not lose privileges, that's what it seemed. Jun didn't know much about him, he was mysterious, a quiet boy who seemed as if he had much to say but no courage to speak. And of course, his prediction was right, but no one - not even Minghao himself was willing to confirm the facts.

"Hao! Whenever you're finished, if you're free tonight at eight open your window and let's talk for a bit," Jun shouts loud enough in order for the other to hear, "I'll be waiting, but, if you don't want to that's okay!"

Minghao who is sitting at his desk hears everything, he stares at his calculus textbook and doesn't move a muscle. Jun was trying so hard, too hard to where Minghao's annoyance would soon form into guilt. But, he knew that wasn't Jun's intention, to make him feel bad or in other words annoyed. He simply wanted to talk, an easy request that could be fulfilled by anyone.

Not easy for Minghao of course. If a mini Soonyoung was sitting on his shoulder during this moment, he definitely would be shouting at the male to suck it up and follow his instructions. It wasn't complicated, a mere talk wouldn't hurt him as the blonde would say. "You make every simple thing complex," Minghao mutters, his head turning towards the door as he was implying the message towards the two individuals who would always check up on him throughout the day, "I love you, but this is becoming too much..." He admits.

But, was Minghao going to do anything about it soon? He wasn't sure, seventeen years of his life being controlled by his parents is something he's become accustomed to. The rules, the planned schedules and each fulfilled request he's accomplished - more has only piled onto his load. Getting himself in trouble would just affect his whole being, even more, he hated feeling like the human version of disappointment to his parents. It was something he'd never want others to feel, knowing that he's received the treatment many times.

Though with the kind thought of him caring for others and their well beings when it came to their mentalities towards themselves, Minghao was always cold to new individuals. Pushing them away, forcing them out of his private life as he was afraid of hurting them. But, Wonwoo and Soonyoung were different. From what he's experienced. The two never gave up on Minghao, as they were aware that his act had to have specific reasoning behind it. The rest left him to be, but, Minghao believed that whatever their rationale was, they were valid as he was aware that he was a slight ass to everyone he's met.

A part of Minghao was telling him that Jun was just like his close friends, understanding, and patient. They were willing to listen and stay although Minghao didn't have the greatest opinion of himself. But, did he even deserve Jun's time of day? The younger male was rude to Jun in a way, refusing to give him more time to talk to him, he couldn't even return the volleyball captain a simple smile.

"I don't deserve his time.." Minghao tells himself, returning back to his work and ignoring Jun's request. He did deserve an explanation, but there was a high possibility of Jun entering his life in order to find a way around his problem. He didn't want to waste the boy's energy and time of day, that was just too much to ask for.