The Diary Of a Gopika

Giridhar Gopal

It was the month of karthik & the moon was ready to flourish in shukla paksha. The tithi marks pratipada – mean the day has arrived when all of us Braj vasis perform the annual Deva Pooja which was supposedly done to please Indra Deva – The King of Devas, to bless us with good rains & prosperity.

But this year, things took a drastic turn when you placed an unusually beautiful proposal before Vrindavan few hours before the pooja was supposed to commence.

Your warm & wise words addressing Nand Baba and the residents of Vrindavan are still ringing in my ears -

"Baba, prayer is something that should effortlessly flow out of heart. It is not something that can be imposed, dictated or forced upon. All these years we have been worshipping Devraj Indra largely out of fear, that he might curse Vrindavan if the offerings are not submitted on time. And where there is fear, there's no place for devotion. Then what is the whole purpose of this pooja? Is this just to satisfy Indra Deva's ego & our false ideologies? Not done right!?

So my priya Braj vasis, for a change, why don't we worship our beloved Giriraj Govardhana this time? For it gives us shelter, provides us with all the necessities & protects us from every calamity? This would be a wonderful gesture of gratitude & respect, and not that of fear & slavery."

Such a beautiful notion, Kaanha!! How would one not fall in love with your out of the world theories? Still, I can sense that major reason for the acceptance of this proposal was your spark of magic on us, you maayavi!!

With all the auspicious offerings in our hands, little hesitation in our hearts & full faith on your words, we all headed towards the Govardhana mountain. The moment we initiated the Govardhana pooja, things turned out disastrous. The furious Indra Deva ordered the rain gods to pour out to extremity, with all the force on Vrindavan. It seemed as if not drops of water but some heavy stones were being pelted from the skies that were hitting our heads. People started panicking and began running here & there to save thier lives. Everyone was screaming, "Hey Mahadeva!! Hey Narayana!! Mhaari raksha karo!! Raksha karo!!" on top of their voices.

And amidst this chaos, I witnessed one of the most divinely pleasing scenes of my life –

The Govardhana hill was slowly rising upwards, detaching itself from the ground and to my utter disbelief, THERE WAS YOU BENEATH THE HILL, HOLDING IT FROM THE CENTRE, THAT TOO WITH YOUR LITTLE FINGER. I couldn't believe what my eyes just witnessed. I wondered if this was actually happening or is it because some big stone has hit my head & I lost my sanity.

While I was still trying to process this visual fully, I heard Balram Daau's voice leading everyone to the shelter of Govardhana.

All of us, the whole village, including our cows, cattle, monkeys & every little creature in Vrindavan gathered under the Govardhana that was standing only & only on your soft little finger. But strangely, none of us panicked or ran away out of dismay. Perhaps, that's the power of immense trust we Braj vasis have on you, as a result of which a wave of calmness occupied all our minds when we realised Krishna is here to the rescue. I still wonder, HOW??? But as usual, you make all my stupid questions disappear just with one gaze.

For SEVEN WHOLE DAYS, you held that huge hill with an enchanting smile on your face, as effortlessly as if you're holding a peacock feather. We neither had food nor water, as none of us could even move from their respective positions because of the continuous pour from the skies, but we still survived. Not just survived, infact we lived the most wholesome days of our lives for you nurtured our souls just with your mere glance. It seemed as if you literally passed on nectar from your eyes to fill our tummies and made us all divine & imperishable.

And to add more bliss, you started playing the most alluring melodies on your flute with the right hand, while the left one still held Govardhana.

That endearing music Kaanha, it felt as if you were playing not flute but the strings of my heart. I forever want to be lost in that divine music and never find my way back to these earthly noises.

I can never forget those beautiful days. Those were undoubtedly the best seven days of my life as you were around all the time. I somehow managed to get the best spot among all from where your moon like face was clearly visible despite of all the heads covering it like clouds.

On closing my eyes, I saw your dreams and on opening them, I saw your vision. What else do I need to exist??

Those magical seven days felt just like seven minutes and finally the skies cleared up as the rain gods took a deep breath. I believe you had some secret conversation with Devraja Indra post which he might have realised how low his intent was, and how high your purpose is.

All of them gradually left for their homes with the pleasant memories of this divine event, singing the glories of Giridhara Gopal all their way back. But I silently stood there, gathering courage to look at your soft hands with my eyes half closed. My heart just couldn't bear to see any traces of bruises on your little fingers. Infact, that thought itself pierced my heart.

All I wanted is, to just hold your hands in mine and absorb all the pain it might have felt silently all these days while holding that huge mountain. How I wish to be the balm on your pain.. only if I could!!

Nevertheless, thank you Kaanha, for these seven days worth seven lifetimes. These moments will be etched in my heart forever.

Radhey radhey !!