The Diary Of a Gopika

Krishna's Letter

I wonder why are separations romanticized soo much? Out of everything that love offers, this is that one phase poets are obsessed with the most. So many songs, rhymes & verses are written on the same.

Fair enough!! Because this whole idea of virah is just so poetically celestial – Dark & deep. The amount of sadistic pleasure it gives is insane. Even when the lovers are drowning in their own tears, writers make it look like a smooth ride on the lake.

But to actually live separation is a different task. Nothing like those beautiful phrases from your favourite novel. It feels as if someone is ripping your heart off, you don't look forward to another sunrise, and your sole reason to live is lost. Going through it for real feels like a never-ending nightmare.

Yet when I sit to write my diary at night, I just love it — The moon, music and my peacock feather bookmark. Just Perfect!! I feel you're closer to me than ever. Because maybe when I write, I'm less a lover & more a poet.

Today, while I was organizing my disheveled almirah, an announcement reached my ears -

" Suno! suno! suno! Someone just arrived from Mathura. He says Krishna sent him with a message and his name is udh... "

Obviously, how can you expect me to hear the next few lines that Chitra tried to convey, for as soon as I heard the word 'Krishna', I found myself running like a mad woman right away. I don't know who he was, how does he look like, and what he has come for. But nothing else mattered to me at that moment other than the fact that he's somehow associated with you.

By the time I reached that place, I could hardly feel my legs. I looked around vigorously for him and found him sitting under a kadamba tree, already so done with Braj vasis innumerable questions about their beloved Kaanha. I was stunned by the fact that he looked so much like you. From a distance, anyone would easily mistake him to be you. By looking at him, one could certainly say that he was definitely your close associate.  He seemed wise and well read. Certain determination was visible on his face to prove a point. You were the one who sent him but it felt as if he has come here for a purpose of his own.

As he put his right hand in one gold embroidered bag that he carried, we all at once peeped into it as if he would take YOU out from that tiny little bag. Urgh! I don't know what is with you that makes us go lunatic at times.

He then took out a rolled piece of paper that had a morpankh adhered to it. Your fragrance that travelled with the letter swayed all our hearts at once. Only we know how much we missed that sugandh. Before he could even utter a word on what was it all about, all of us literally grabbed that letter from his hands and tried to open it hastily. More than anything, everyone wanted to have that letter all for themselves so that they could feel that touch of yours, that they have been deprived of all these days.

And in between all this snatch & catch game, my eyes managed to hold the sight of few lines written on it :

"My friend Uddhava is here to teach you guys a few lessons on 'The Supreme Wisdom' that will assist you to get over the pain caused by love & separation, and thereby lead a happy life. Listen to what this learned man has to say carefully, and give a thought about it. Please do not refuse to do so, it's your Kaanha's wish!"

These lines are not as clear and straight as they seem to be. They definitely have some deep intent behind them – is the least we could figure out. After all, how can one expect you to say things so precisely without an added twist. That's certainly not your style. You still didn't let go off this habit of taking pleasure in playing with words & hearts, right?

Seeing all of us going insane over that one piece of paper (which literally means the world to us), Uddhava has lost his cool.

"Enough!!", he exclaimed!! "THIS. You see this is exactly why Krishna has sent me here. Just look at what a joke you all have made out of yourselves by drowning into this maya called love. Don't get me wrong but you all look like a bunch of crazy women whose minds are completely taken over by ignorance. Krishna was right, you people really need some strong dose of reality to calm your inner self, come out of this delusion, and ultimately understand the parabrahma. I'm only here to help you with this. Trust me."

Before we could even process his sudden outrage, he toned down a bit and went on to say few more lines :

" See, you all need to get this straight in your heads that Krishna is not your beloved gwaala anymore. He's not one among you and definitely not what you all imagine him to be. The only truth is that he's now 'The King Maker of Aryavarta', and there's no looking back for him.

He's a changed man now. He has his own priorities to attend, duties to fulfill, and people to look after. How much ever you love him, you just can't have him. So it's better you guys move on with your lives. Dedicate your minds & hearts to the formless Parabrahma, and meditate on Shunya.

This maya called love, will take you no where. Instead, you'll only end up with irreversible pain & emptiness. So, just let this sink in and pop this delusional bubble for your own good."

Hmm...!! So we now got it. Not what he said, but what you wanted us to hear. You sent him not for us to learn philosophical lessons, instead to teach him the ultimate lesson of prem & samarpan. Right?? Now this is something very Kaanhaish!

You can now relax and assume your task is done. As always, 'your wish is our command, sir!'.

Radhey radhey!