The Diary Of a Gopika

Gopi Prema

Being LOVE yourself, you choose us - abodh gwaalins, to educate Uddhava about love. The fact that you counted on us as the ones who lived & understood love at least to some extent, made my heart smile.

"Dear uddhav jii", I said in a candid tone : "You being the guest of honor at Vrindavan, how will we not let you experience the beauty of what Braj is well known for - LOVE. Braj is known as Prem Dham and shall continue to do so till eternity.

Ohh learned man, what makes you think that love is some kind of illusion, when the truth is - everything else in this world is an illusion except love. Nothing can sustain in this universe even for a fraction of a second, without the existence of love. And the formless Parabrahma that you are talking about, is also nothing but pure love.

Coming to our love for Kaanha, we never wanted to own him, have him, or claim him. We were more than happy being around him, serving him, and enjoying his divine leelas. Leave alone his presence, even his mere name is enough to take us into deep samadhi - that sadhus & yogis attain after spending thousands of years in penance.

And about attaining moksha, it is not some holy phrase in the books that you read & acquire. Infact, it never has a fixed definition. Moksha is a state that is personal to everyone. For us, it is by drowning in Krishna Prema that we experience a state of supreme bliss that is equivalent, or even greater than the highest degree of Moksha.

Hey Uddhava, love is not always about holding hands, blooming romance, or tying sacred threads;

Love in the true sense, is offering the fruit of your prayers to your beloved;

Smiling at their joy & tearing up on their grief;

Living a few moments with them & surviving on those memories alone for a lifetime.

LOVE IS NEVER ABOUT GIVING & TAKING, IT'S ALL ABOUT GIVING, GIVING & GIVING ALONE!

Similarly, our love for Kaanha was never about having him all for ourselves, or being with him all the time. It was about embracing and celebrating each & everything about his existence on this earth.

Rainfall comes during monsoon & leaves, but the soil absorbs those waters into its adobe and gives rise to countless crops that end up feeding & benefiting so many souls till the end of the time. He's like that rainfall in our lives. Outwardly, it may seem like he came & left, but in reality, he came & settled. Initially with us & now within us.

And Uddhava, how would we meditate on your nirguna nirakara Parabrahma when all our minds are stolen by your friend? How do we surrender our lives to your God when no sign of life is left within us anymore except for these lifeless bodies? And how do we focus on our sahasrara chakra alone when every hair of our body is fixed on Krishna?

And answering your concern, our love will never ever create any hurdles on his path, and neither will it stop our lives from leading to the infinite. It will only give him strength to fight the battles of life & solace when he's tired of fighting.

Our love uddhava, is not driven by desire, it's driven by sacrifice. Purely sacrifice. Only by getting lost in his thoughts, we find ourselves and only by falling in love with him, we rise high to the supreme."

As I finished, this probably being my longest monologue ever, there was a deep silence all over. My fellow Gopis had a smile on their faces, as if all the words I uttered were exactly what their hearts echoed.

And Uddhava, he seemed as if he's still not over the new definition of love we Gopikas introduced him to, which was far different from the one he had in his head all these days.

But wait, we're not going to let him be convinced only with this little of what we initiated him with. How do we not make him meet the manifestation of love itself - Radha.

Till now, he only heard what love is all about, but he'll now experience what love looks & feels like.

And with this intent, we took him to the place where Radhey is mostly found post your departure. Yes, it's your favourite Kusum Sarovar.

. . .

" तुम क्या जानो उद्धव,
गोपियों का प्रेम क्या होता है।
ये तो अपने सारे पंख खो कर भी,
सांवरे के उड़ान में खुश होता है। "

Radhe radhe!!