When Destiny Hits You

Chapter 11

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Halo-halong emosyon ang nararamdaman ko. Hindi ko na alam kung ano pa ba ang gagawin. Naguguluhan na ako..

I told myself not to get attched to anyone. The lesser the people i know, the less damage i'll cause.

Tadhana,bakit ngayon pa? Bakit ngayon kung kailan tanggap ko na?

I looked at Rain...Im scared,im hurt..i doesn't know what to do.

"You're really serious that you like me?" I asked him. My voice was shaking a minute hasn't passed yet but my tears slowly falls down from my eyes. "Hindi....Hindi mo dapat ako ginusto Rain...maling mali...I shouldn't be me.. Hindi mo dapat hinayaan ang sarili mo na mahulog sa akin..."

I burst out crying so hard while saying those words that It should've been Yssa he falls inlove with and not me..I said hurtful words to him..I pushed him away even if it's hurting me.

"Rain,please kung ano man ang nararamdaman mo para sa akin..pigilan mo please."

He was crying...and seeing him crying like that breaks my heart.

We both cried for about 15 minutes straight and when I have no tears left to cry, I stand up and turned my back at him. I couldn't look at him...I just cant.

"Rain," i called his name "kung ano man ang nararamdaman mo para sa akin..please itigil mo na"

I know i said hurtful words but I dont have a choice but to push him away..

"Rose, matalino ka naman 'di ba?"tanong nya. "Siguro naman alam mo na hindi basta basta napipigil ang damdamin. Hindi yan switch na pwede mong buhayin kung kelan mo gusto pagkatapos ay papatayin mo kapag ayaw mo na."dagdag nya pa.

Oo Rain, alam ko. Alam na alam ko...pasensya na kung nasasaktan kita pero mas doble yung sakit na nararamdaman ko ngayon.

Sa totoo lang, gusto kong bawiin yung mga sinabi ko. Gusto kong patahanin ka sa pagluha mo. Gusto kong matigil yung sakit na nararamdaman mo ngayon pero hindi maari.. ayokong mas masaktan ka pa oras na.permanente na akong mawala...

"Please Rain...pigilan mo"

He laughed bitterly.."And so? Gaya nga ng sabi mo we aren't living in a Fairytale. Ano ngayon kung gusto kita? Pigilan? Thats bullshit Rose! Mahal kita! I want you! Ano bang mahirap intindihin don?!"

"Rain...we can remain as friends right?" I said. Im hurt,deeply hurt...but I have to do this, i MUST do this.

"How can i stay friends with the girl i fall inlove with?" Saad nya pa.

"Hindi ko masusuklian ang pagmamahal mo Rain..Hindi.."

"I don't care! Im going to court you with or without chance! Im going to court you sa ayaw mo at sa gusto" sagot nya. "Gagawin ko ang lahat until you finally said yes. Until the feelings is mutual" dagdad nya pa.

I looked at him. Kitang kita ko sa mga mata nya kung gaano sya nasasaktan.

Damn..the pain of seeing him like that is piercing through my heart.

I breathe deeply before starting to speak. "Rain...no matter what you do,i cant reciprocate it." I said.

Putting up a strong font again so he wont see me cry.

"Masasayang lang oras mo. Im doing this for your sake too. So please...habang pwede ba,itigil mo na yan. Para less damage sayo at sa'kin." Dagdag ko pa.

"Ano bang problema Rose? Bakit ba ipinipilit mo'ng huwag kitang mahalin?"

I stared at him for a while but i didnt answered. I turned my back at him and started to walk away.