Words.

I've tried

I have failed you once again.

I let my body take control while my mind stayed silent.

The mind I use to have was so alive.

So vibrant.

Now it whispers words of self-loathing.

Wishing for me to end it all.

My guardian angel has left me alone.

He's given up on me.

Because I am a failure.

I want to give up.

I want to end everything I've ever started.

But I can't.

Because I know that there will come a day when everything goes just right.

I will be happy one day.

It may not be today.

It may not be tomorrow.

Or the next day.

But it will happen.

Which is why I don't want you to give up either.

I want you to stay with me for as long as you can.

When you want to leave me here to fend for myself, call me.

I want to hear your voice.

And I want you to hear the sound of my tears hitting the ground beneath me because I want you to know that you will be missed.

It will be the most painful thing knowing that you are gone.

I will be leaving ghost texts and hour long voicemails saying how much I miss you.

And how much I could've done to help you.

But you won't listen to me.

Because your mind overpowers reality.

But I need you to do one thing for me.

Don't. Let your mind win when all it thinks about is ending everything.

Don't. Let it win.

You have to remember that.