Proposal • BWS

24 • Keep those feelings.

I woke up from my nap, it was quite short but at least I've got some sort of energy now. It was great.

Sitting up, I saw some clothes and a towel on the coffee table, figured that Brad might have placed it there, how kind.

"Brad?" I call out, looking around. Minutes later he hadn't shown up, I decided to stand up and check my room. "Brad?" I call out again, once I peeked into my room, I saw nothing, no one. I got quite upset knowing that he may have left already. Quickly, I rush to the guest room where Jeremy and my mom stays at, even though I know he won't be there because it's private.

As expected, he wasn't there. I sighed, suddenly I thought of where my family may have been to, they've been out for a long time, it was already 9 am. Walking back to the couch, I grabbed the items placed on the table and decided to take a shower.

Once I finished taking a shower, I put some clothes on and not even bothered to brush my hair. I dried it a bit and once it wasn't that wet, I tie it up into a bun, buns aren't really the best when I do them, but, I couldn't care less.

Looking at my decor that I bought the other day, I decided I was going to actually fix my place.

Without having any distractions.

The first thing I wanted to do was add the frames and the little pots I got from the shop, I couldn't do much considering the bench still hasn't arrived. I wonder why it takes so long

-

Once my stuff was already placed in the spots that needed something for it to become more presenting I started to make some lunch.

Surprisingly it took not so long for me to decorate my place, which was weird because I usually would take such long time.

I heard mumbling on the door, assuming it was my mum and brother, it was.

"Welcome back." I said, while fixing the towels on the counter, "Hey, got some snacks." Mum said, I sighed and turned to them, "You know I already have snacks." She chuckled, "Yeah, and all of them are chips or chocolate. You know those don't satisfy me." I shrug and turn back to the stove, "where's Brad?" Mum asked, I shrugged and for a second I had doubts whether to answer or not, luckily Jeremy spat.

"Didn't we see him just minutes ago? Were you not there?" He piped up and I stood there, listening to their conversation. Why did Brad have to go anyway? I heard something about some project, clearly he wasn't telling the truth.

"Bradley was there? I had no idea, I didn't see him." My mum said, giggling afterwards.

"Do you have any idea Lynn?" Jeremy asked me, I stopped what I was doing and turned around, "Like I said, I don't know." I smiled sarcastically.

Mum and Jeremy decided to leave again, no, mum literally forced Jeremy to come and it was hilarious. I on the other hand found something interesting, Brad's jacket.

It would be weird to call him back again because that would be tiring and, I'm not sure I'm ready to see him again after what happened, most especially the kiss.

I didn't want it to happen, that's what my brain is telling me, but really deep down I'm still longing for that feeling. I wouldn't want to take advantage of him when Brad is sort of not in his proper self because that would be weird and he has a fiancé.

Loosing, Erin is scary. What more when I loose Brad.

-

Days have passed by and Brad still hasn't returned here to grab his jacket, not that I was bothered by it to much.

Connor insisted to come over to my place, to talk about some "things". I already saw it coming, I knew that one day he'd do this.

"Ready to talk?" Con sat beside me and I nodded slowly, I really wasn't sure but I wanted to get this over with.  "Right," He clears his throat and looks at me, "You still have feelings, right?" I shot my head up, acting surprised, but really I already know what he was referring to. I acted stupid, "What?" I said, acting as confused as I could. "Don't play dumb Lynn, you still have feelings for Brad don't you?"

I bit my lip as I lock my eyes on the floor, feeling the guilt and butterflies from inside of me. I didn't want to feel like this, after all these years I tried to fucking move on but, guess me trying didn't really do anything at all.

"Yeah, I'm sorry." I huffed, "Sorry for what?" Con asked, without any hesitation, I began to rant about my feelings. "I'm sorry because I still like Brad, even though he has someone else, even though I know that he's going to marry someone else, even though I know for a fact that he doesn't return the feeling."

I heard Connor mutter something, but I didn't quite catch it.

"What was that?" slowly looking at him, "Nothing, anyways. You should never apologize for your feelings, it is what it is and you can't control it." That's true, I should never apologize for my feelings, even if I didn't want it to happen. "Yeah." I sighed deeply, leaning more into the seat.

"That's all I wanted to hear, thanks Lynn." Con stood up and began picking up his things.

"Wh-what? That's all? What are you doing?"

"Picking up my stuff?" He acts calm as if nothing was wrong.

"No you-, aren't you going to give me any instructions on what should I do? Are you really just going to leave?" I was so conflicted, why is he acting like this? What's wrong with him? After our super serious talk he decides to leave all of a sudden?

He glances at something on his right, I called his attention. "Con?"

Con kept looking at whatever was on his right but I didn't care, "Keep those feelings, don't push them away." he smiles at me, confusion was still written all over my face, I had no idea what he meant by that. I was too bothered by the fact that he was just going to leave.

"W-what are you?"

He started walking towards the door and waves goodbye to me, I didn't wave back.

The last thing I knew is that Con had just left, just like that.

"Keep these feelings?"

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[HELLO PEOPLE YES, I AM INDEED STILL ALIVE. SORRY FOR THE EXTREME DELAY ON THIS ONE, I REALLY HAD NO MOTIVATION AND I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO WRITE. ANYWAYS, HERE WE ARE NOW, WHAT DO YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN NEXT? WHAT DID CONNOR MEAN BY THAT? COMMENT, SHARE, AND VOTE THIS STORY IF YOU WISH! THANKS FOR READING ILY ALL SO MUUUUUCHH.]