Always Adam

Chapter 2

The guardians don't talk to me about my punishment. I spend the next week just hanging out in my room all day. I eventually find out the fate of my best girl friend Julie. She is being sent to Florida to live with her grandma for the rest of her senior year. I beg her to take me with her. It's not going to happen though. I also learn through Julie that the twins are being sent to boarding school. Their parents are extremely wealthy.

Julie cried when she told me Doug's dad made him get a job. He won't be finishing high school anytime soon. Most of the others are just being home schooled. I hadn't talked to Mike, but Julie said she heard that is what his parents are doing with him. I was hoping that would be my fate also. Then it hits me. Donna and Ted could send me to boarding school. I have plenty of money. They are in control of it until I reach certain ages. I think the first lump of money I get is at the age of 21. Then I don't get anymore until I turn 25. I think when I hit 30 is when I get the remaining money. This was told to me at one point, but I didn't pay that much attention. I have some court appointed attorney that Ted and Donna have to go through to get me money for stuff. I also know they get money to take care of me.

When dinner time comes, I trudge down the steps. Each step puts me in a shitter mood. If it weren't for my crush on Mike I wouldn't have even been there that night. Perhaps I should swear off boys and vow to keep my virginity in tack. Or not. Julie says after the first couple times it really does feel good. I mean so many people wouldn't be doing it if it didn't feel good right. I plop down at the dinner table without saying a word. My stomach growls. I didn't eat all day. I reach over and stab a piece of pot roast. I deposit it on my plate and then help myself to some mashed potatoes and gravy. I take a bit of broccoli only because I don't want to hear Donna complain about my non veggie issues.

After dinner I decide to take a long hot bath. As I relax in the warm water I think about Mike. I have my eyes closed and try to think about what his touch would feel like on my bare skin. I run my hand lightly down my inner thigh. I open my eyes realizing this won't work for me. It always works in those cheesy romance novels, but my life isn't a romance novel. I wash and get out.

As I lay on my bed in my big fluffy towel, I can't help but wonder where my life will be in a couple weeks. I put on a pair of sweats and t-shirt. I'm just about to call Mike when the guardians come in to talk. I sit up on my bed while Donna takes a seat at my desk. She looks over at Ted and nods. Ted, who continues to stand, clears his throat. He looks scared. Maybe it's just nervous. I want to roll my eyes, but don't.

"Carly, you know how much we love you," he starts. Now I really want to roll my eyes. The guardians take fairly good care of me, but I really never felt the love. I don't think either of them ever hugged me. I don't remember either ever saying the words to me. "We have taken careful consideration in how to handle what has happened. We want you to continue to go to school so in order for that to happen you will have to go to a different school."

"I can do home schooling. A lot of the kids are doing that," I say starting to panic. He puts his hand up to stop me. "Donna and I have already decided and made the necessary arrangements for you. We enrolled you in East Riverside High," he says. My mouth cracks when it hits the floor. Alright so it didn't actually hit the floor, but it sure felt like it. I start to panic. "East Riverside is a hoodlum school," I cry out. "Gangs go to that school. You can't be serious," I say.

"Carly, we understand it's not the best school, but it's the closest school around." I look at Ted. "Why can't I do home schooling like the others. Or you can send me to boarding school. I know I have a ton of money. Please don't make me go to East Riverside. People get shot there. People disappear," I add remembering the girl that disappeared from a party like six months ago. The tears start falling down my cheeks. I don't realize I am crying until I feel one hit my hand.

Ted looks over at Donna. She nods at him. "We've rented you an apartment closer to the school. Your eighteen now and like you said, you have plenty of money. I spoke to Arnie and he has approved the apartment for you along with a monthly allowance to live off. He also approved the payment to Mr. Wilks for your share of the damages. He was not happy about that. Donna and I think being on your own will help you learn what responsibility is and we feel you really need to learn this."

I sit staring at Ted trying to process all he said. Part of me wants to lash out and tell both him and Donna they suck as guardians and to fuck off. The other part of me tells myself that I will be better off without them. I stop my tears and wipe my face. "Fine. When do I move," I ask. "You start school tomorrow. Your apartment won't be ready for a couple more days. Donna has been working on getting it ready for you," Ted smiles at me. Like that should make me happy. I stare at Ted and wait. Donna gets up and they leave. Whatever I think as get up and slam my door shut.

Even though I am grounded and not suppose to leave the house, I sneak out. I head over to Mike's house after grabbing my hoodie. I wait outside for someone to answer the door. I look over to the driveway and notice there isn't a car there. I'm about to walk away when the door opens. Mike stands there looking at me. "Hey," I say. He looks like he isn't going to say anything to me. Finally he says "Hey Car." I stand there looking at him. He stands there looking back at me. His blond hair is a mess and he looks like he just woke up.

"Can I come in," I say annoyed that he is just standing there looking at me. He opens the door and motions for me to come inside. He closes the door and follows me into the living room. I sit down on the couch and he takes the chair. The atmosphere is strained. I'm confused. Things are always easy and comfortable with Mike. I sit looking at him. He sits looking at me. Neither of us says anything.

Finally I speak up. "Donna and Ted are kicking me out," I say. His eyes go big, but still he says nothing. "Did you hear me," I say loudly. He nods yes. I stare at him waiting. "I'm moving Mike. They enrolled me in East Riverside and found me an apartment. I mean who does that. I know they never really wanted me, but to just toss me out." I want to cry, but don't. Then I think maybe I should. At least then maybe Mike would say something or comfort me.

Mike is still silent. I can feel the anger building in me. I stand up. "Have a nice life Mike. It was nice knowing you," I say as I storm towards the door. He hurries to grab my arm. "I'm sorry Carly," he says. I stop and turn to him. "I don't want you to be sorry Mike," I say and then realize how stupid it was to come here. What did I want him to say? I wanted him to say he wouldn't let me leave. That he would talk to his mom and dad and get them to let me stay with them. I am after all eighteen so if he asked, I could stay.

"What do you want me to say Car," he asks. "That I feel awful about all of this. That I know it was my fault you were there that night. I asked you to go with me. This is my fault. I feel like shit enough already. Now you tell me this." I stare at him unsure what to say. I didn't come here to make him feel bad. "I was hoping maybe I could just stay with you," I whisper. He shakes his head no. "My parents are so mad at me right now Car. There is no way they would let you stay here. I'm sorry."

A tear slides down my cheek and I see Mike's eyes tear up. "I'm sorry Car. You should just go," he says. I look at him stunned. "Just go," I yell. "Seriously Mike. Just go. What the fuck," I shout. "I tell you I'm moving and you say you're sorry and I should go. That's it." He reaches up and wipes at his eye. He says nothing. I reach out and shove him hard. He stumbles back a little surprised. "I can't believe how stupid I've been," I scream at him. "I wasted so much time following you around like a puppy. Just waiting for you to notice how I feel about you. And you say just go. Well fuck you Mike and this is me just going," I say spinning and running out the door. "I never led you on Carly," he yells after me.

I don't want to hear what he has to say. Instead of going home, I run down the street. I run and run and run. Finally when I can run no more I collapse in someone's yard. I lay on the ground out of breath crying. I hate him. My heart breaks. I love him. He doesn't care about me. I can hear him saying just go over and over again in my head. I lie on the ground and cry. I kick at the ground and scream as loud as I can. An outside light comes on at the house. I get up and run off. I make my way home and sneak back into the house. I cry myself to sleep.