We're Still Standing...Book 5

Please, Someone Help Me

Zander POV

“Zander, what are you doing” Maria asked as she came up to me when I just got back from a partroll run.

“Nothing, why?” I asked and took a long drink of water. 

“Well papa said you came home early today, is everything alright?” She sat down at a table and I joined her.

“Not really no, I met my mate today. It’s Zeke.” I admitted and she smiled at me.

“Oh he is so sweet! He is in my English class.” She said, sounding excited.

“Well I don’t know what to do, I thought she was a female but I found out she is a he, I know the world is changing and being more open minded but why would I be paired with him? I have my own issues, I don’t need a mate with body issues and gender issues, I’m trying to figure out my own issues.” I said and I’m a lot like papa, I’m an emotional person and cry at a lot of stuff and feel things like papa does so when I felt my throat get tight and tears forming, I wasn't surprised.

“You just answered your own question Z, you both are perfect for each other, you both can help one another through your struggles. He is a real sweetheart Zander, papa knows exactly who he is so he obviously approves of the mating, you just need to open that big heart of yours and accept it as well.” My sister is wise it seems. I smiled slightly at her and sighed.

“He is also blind, a blind transgender werewolf, how do I come to terms with that?” 

"It's not that hard a concept, Z. You accepted Aaron and before you say it's because he's blood well Zeke is your mate." 

She had a point but what would the pack think if their Alpha had a blind mate and on top of that he was born a girl. 

"I just don't know, I'll think about it and weigh my options… and besides you don’t understand Maria, your mate is the gender they are supposed to be and she accepts you for being a werewolf even if she is human." I can't have him as a mate…I don't want to be a disappointment to the family.

"You're hopeless." She huffed storming off. Women, I shook my head and turned around and saw papa standing there, great.

“You heard?” I asked and he nodded and sighed softly, walking over to the table I sat back down at.

“Yes, I heard. Zander you know no matter what, no matter who your mate is, they are your soulmate, they are meant for you. No matter who it is. I am mates to a demon and an angel, a warlock, a merman, a wolf, vampires and a human. We are the first and only as far as I know a ten way mated couple of different supernaturals. Having a blind transgender mate, who cares? As long as you are happy, that is all that matters. If the pack accepts my mating, they will accept yours son. You just need to accept him for who he is, not what he is. He was born a girl yes but he is a man, he felt he was a man and changed his body to look as he feels. Your sister is right, he is a sweet boy. His father’s are supportive of his choices and the pack knows him, so what are you really scared of son?” He asked and I looked away.

“If you tell your past, I’ll tell you my fears.” I said and he shook his head.

“That’s not fair son, you can’t bargain with me about this. When you feel like talking to me, as my son and not a smartass, come find me.” He said and walked off. I’m striking out left and right.

I didn't know what to do, I wish someone would tell me what to do. 

Not long after pacing in my room grandpa, Jake came into my room and I internally sighed. 

“Hey grandpa, how are you?” I asked when he sat down on my bed, patting the spot next to him. I took the offer and sat beside him and he looked at me, his bright green eyes looking into my soul it seemed.

“Did I ever tell you about my first mate?” He asked, shocking me that he had another mate besides papaw Sawyer. 

“No. I didn’t know you had another mate.” 

“Mhm I did, his name was Colson, he’s Connor’s birth father. When I first met him, I was just back from Alpha camp and I met Jayden and Jaylen for lunch at Colson’s diner and when I walked in, I knew he was my mate. I found out from your great uncles that he was married and had twins on the way. I didn’t want to take him away from his family so I spoke to him and told him about me and that he was my mate. He didn’t even give me a second thought before he called me a freak and told me to leave him alone. I had asked him to reject me so that way I could move on and hopefully find another mate in time but he didn’t. I went through so much pain because of it Zander, I felt each time he had sex and saw images of it as well. It went on for a while until one day it got so bad it put me in a coma for three months. Over that time, Colson visited me and when I woke up, I hesitated on seeing him because I didn’t know what to expect. He had told me his wife had the babies and found out they weren’t his, and was in the process of divorcing her. Well we started talking more and spent time together and the night we finally mated, he found out he had to go on a deployment the next morning and it was like rejection all over again. He came home after about six months for a week. Well he got pregnant and he didn’t tell me, he got hurt badly one day and I went to Iraq to bring him home. When I talked to Ben, he told me about Connor being born early. I had no idea I had a son on the way, had no idea Colson was four months pregnant. I lost Colson a few hours after I arrived there and I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t know what to think or how to feel. I had a newborn son who was fighting for his life and I had to bury his father. My relationship with Colson was always rocky but I loved him, he was my soulmate and I accepted him, flaws and all. My point in my long story of my first mate is that no matter what Zander, your mate should come first, you should accept him no matter who he is. He was made for you and you for him. No mating pair is perfect, but mates are perfect for one another.” 

"I get it… I'll think about it and talk to him tomorrow." I meant it. I'll talk to him. 

"Good, I love you Zan." He left and I flop on the bed with my mind going a million miles a minute.