Give In

confessing

"This is actually..." Oh no, did he hate it? "Very good".

He was once again making fun of me. I'd been so stressed trying to cook something decent since I got home. That wasn't funny.

"You scared me!", I hit him with my napkin.

"Sorry", he laughed.

"Is it actually good?", or was he just being nice?

"I mean it. It's really good, I like it".

"Ok...", I murmured still not convinced.

"You know... I've never tried paella before, so I don't know how it is supposed to taste", he commented with that childish smile of his.

I laughed and he laughed with me. I didn't know what I was thinking when I decided to cook this for dinner. I've only tried paella a couple of times before, and although mine didn't turn out bad, it didn't actually taste like the original. I took some liberties with the ingredients and made my own version of it. I was kinda proud thought, but I didn't know if other people would agree.

Shawn arrived when I had just finished putting everything on the pot. He appeared on my door at 8 pm sharp with his signature black jeans, an olive green shirt and a bottle of wine on his hand.

It felt weird to have him here, maybe because I was still trying to get used to this place as my own. It was weird, but not awkward.

When I told Nicole I had invited him over, her brows almost jumped out of her face. I guess she wasn't expecting that. It was early in the morning, I was getting ready to go to work and she had just arrived from her night shift, but that didn't stop her from facetiming Leah to let her know as well. They were both so on board with me moving on, when I hadn't said a word about it. On my mind, I had just invited a friend over for dinner, nothing else.

"So you have a nice apartment", he said putting down his glass of wine.

"Thank you... I'm still getting used to it".

"Do you... regret it?", he asked cautiously.

"Oh no", I said. "It isn't a nice situation and it will hurt like hell for a while, but right now I'm pretty comfortable with my decision".

"That's good".

"Yeah..."

"I just want to know... Why did he think you cheated on him with me?"

I could probably dig a whole in the ground right now and hide. I was almost sure he had forgotten about it or didn't care enought to ask. I was wrong.

"Uh... a friend of him saw us that night we went out to celebrate".  I took a sip of wine.

"Ok, but we weren't doing anything bad", he protested.

"I know", I said right away. "I'm so sorry he reacted that way and drag you into this mess, I know you did nothing wrong".

"Don't be sorry", he took my hand in his. "Your boyfriend was the one assuming stuff".

"Ex boyfriend", I corrected him and he smiled.

"I thought he was ok with us hanging out".

He got me there.

"Well... not really".

Shawn looked at me with a confused gaze on his face and turned his head a little, kinda like what puppies do when they're confused. It was cute. So cute, that for a couple of seconds it distracted me from the embarrasment I was feeling.

"To be honest... he was never ok with it. I lied".

He didn't say anything for a while and when I thought he was going to do so, he threw his head back and laughed loudly. He even held his tummy laughing.