Bloodstained (Thorin x OC)

Not Again

"If you really are a true wanderer, you will find a path and catch up!" Her elven ears easily heard him call down to her. She looked around for any possible footholds, and spotted a way farther to her right that would get her up, but just short of the path.

"I can get over there if you pull me up!" She shouted as loud as she could. It didn't seem like they heard her, however, as they started walking away. "Hey!" she tried getting their attention. "Wait!"

"You'll catch up!" Bilbo called down to her. "We'll wait up for yo--" His voice was suddenly cut off as he disappeared over the ledge. Great. Just fantastic. It could take hours for her to find a way up. If she found a way up. She started climbing back towards where she fell, rain still pouring down atop her, making her path extremely slippery.

She was soaked to the bone by now, and covered in scrapes and bruises from her fall. The cold rain stung her wounds, and she couldn't feel her fingers any longer, but still she pressed on. She climbed left for some time, trying to inch up as she went, but to little success. The carnage of the stony battle made the climb even worse, with giant gaps between footholds and missing pieces of what would have been a path. Her arms and legs burned, and when she came across a ledge large enough, she sat down, her legs dangling over the giant chasm before her. Part of her wished the ledge would break and she'd be put out of her misery. Before she could stop them, tears spilled from her eyes, and she sobbed into her hands, wiping what was left of her dark war paint off.

All she was trying to do was make Gandalf proud, and help protect middle earth from evil that lurked in the shadows. She knew she would never be as great as Elrond or Galadriel, but she could at least try and be something more than the useless wanderer or elven guard she'd been for all her life. No matter where she went, or what life she tried to pursue, it always ended in death or disaster. Maybe if she wasn't here, the dwarves would be okay. Maybe she should just leave them behind, thinking she slipped and died. Maybe nature would just run its course and everything would work out in the end.

Agarwaen looked up and out at the dark mountains in front of her. The rain cascaded and dripped down the stone, falling to the river below where it was swept away to some unknown location. The sky kept weeping along with her, washing away her tears and the dirt of the journey it took to get here.

She sat there for a while, just feeling numb. She barely felt the pain of the fall, and her emotions felt dead. She doubted her strength, her resolve, willpower, and each and every one of her abilities. She questioned if Eru actually cared for his creations. It didn't seem like he cared about her very much. Maybe she made him upset, and he had Aulë punish her with his dwarves. Maybe he'd forsaken her for her sins. Maybe he'd cursed her. She pulled her legs up over the edge and pressed her knees to her chest. She stayed like that for a few minutes, her mind feeling empty and hollow.

But what if this was a test? What if, just like in the tales of heroes, the fate of something did lie with her? Just as she thought that, the rain let up a little bit. Not enough to make the journey safe, but enough for her to take it as a sign. She let out one more choked sob, wiped her eyes, and carefully stood back up. She winced as her fingers curled around a handhold and she pulled herself up. Looking ahead at the path before her, she finally saw a way back up to the path. She'd never seen something more beautiful in her life. Despite feeling like a drunkard in the morning, she forced herself to climb up. Slipping from time to time, she always managed to regain her footing, and before she knew it, she rolled over onto the path, laying down facing the sky.

Cold raindrops hit her face, making her squeeze her eyes shut and sit up. She caught her breath, and then stood. She gulped as the ground briefly swayed beneath her and her legs felt like mush. Still, she put one foot in front of the other, and pressed on.