One Damn Shot of a Lifetime [COMPLETED]

Chapter 39: Broken Souls

My Dear friend

I think of you so often,
And wherever you may be,
I hope you know that our friendship meant the world to me.

For though you left this earthly life,
To dwell in heavenly skies,
You and I will always know,
That friendship never dies.

So thankyou for the memories,
Which warmed my heart each day,
and for those I miss you so much,
now you've gone away...

I felt my soul being dragged back to reality. I was slowly drifting away form the place where we last embraced.

I tried to move my body and I felt my fingers flinch. I slowly opened my eyes and a white ceiling was staring back at me. I looked down to see another angel sleeping on the foam beside me. My body was so heavy but I reached for his hand and slightly squeezed it. He woke up and surprise quickly registered on his face. He immediately stood up and held my face. Ipinatong niya ang noo niya sa noo ko at pumikit, hindi ko mapigilan to do the same.

"Cath." bulong niya at tinitigan lang ako. I can see his dark brown orbs, and at the depths of those orbs I can see pain, brokenness, and grief.

"Where's Quin?" until in reality I was still hoping that he isn't gone. I am still hoping that they would tell me that he's still here. Hindi niya ako sinagot at tinitigan lang ako. "What? Tell me he's just in another room strong as ever." tumatawa pa ako habang sinasabi ito, the laugh of disbelief.

"He's gone Cath." I saw sadness crossed his face and a tear fell from his eye. One tear and he inhaled deeply at pinigal ang pag tulo ng iba pa niyang luha.

He's gone...

So it wasn't all a dream then. I knew it wasn't but it still hurts like I've been stabbed right in my chest. I was lost that I didn't even noticed that I was sobbing again. Axel wrapped me in his arms and it only made me sob harder. I heard the door opened and mom entered the room. Her tears dropped when she saw me. Kumawala si Axel sa yakap and left the room para makapag usap kami ni mom.

"Baby, how are you?" mom asked.

"Mom it hurts." my lips was trebling and she embraced me in her arms.

"I know baby, I know." she whispered while slowly sweeping my hair with her soft hands.

I was just in her arms pouring my heart out. Why does it have to me Quin? Bakit hindi nalang 'yung mga demonyo na gumawa sa kanya ang namatay?! Of all people, why him? We were just talking and laughing the other day, he even promised to take me to a gun shooting lesson after this chaos, and just in a blink of an eye wala na siya sa piling ko. Napaka unpredictable talaga ng oras. But atleast fate gave me the chance to talk to him and be with him at his last hours. I had the chance to see his smile and to hear his laughter for one last time.

"Wherever he is now, I'm sure he is happy. Because you are alive my dear daughter. He gave his own for you to keep yours, he definitely won't like it if you spend your whole life being sad because of him, and I'm sure he is happy to reunite with his mother again." Mom said and her eyes was full of assurance. I couldn't help but smile sa sinabi niya. Of course, he's happy with Tita Kiana now.

"I will process your papers for transfer to Singapore. I can't let you stay here for long baby, I can't handle if one more bad thing will happen to you. No more talking me out from this, I will not change my mind." dagdag pa ni mom.

I didn't answer her. Nakatulala lang ako sa puting pader ng ospital. Maybe it's right to leave. I was the one who started this mess in the first place, because of me Quin is dead, mula nu'ng pumasok ako sa buhay ng grupo ni Axel nagka leche leche na lahat. Hindi ko na ata kakayanin kapag may nawala pang buhay dahil sa'kin. Maybe if I'll leave, life will be easier for all of us. Wala na silang kaylangan protektahan, wala na silang dapat ibuwis pa na buhay para lang maligtas ako. Maybe I deserve to live with this pain forever for what I have done here. I have devastated them all.

~~

That three days in the hospital has been a nightmare. But finally I was discharged as early as three days. My flight will leave first thing tomrrow so I must finish my business here today.

"Are you sure hindi ka muna mag papahinga?" tanong ni Asher sa'kin habang nagda-drive kami papunta kela Quin.

"Aalis na ako bukas Asher, wala na akong oras para mag pahinga, I need to finish my business here today." walang emosyon ko na sabi. Hindi lang siya sumagot at pinagpatuloy ang pag mamaneho. Pag dating namin doon agad ako pumasok.

Para akong robot na nag lalakad patungo sa puting kahon sa harap ko. Flowers were all over the place, halatang marami ang nag mamahal sa kanya. I walked towards the big white box and through the glass I saw his angelic face. Para lang siyang mahimbing na natutulog, so peaceful and in harmony. I saw droplets of water dropping on the coffin glass, I was crying again.

I'm sorry that I'm such a coward Quin. I know running away from my problems isn't the right solution but hindi ko na kaya na may masaktan pa dahil sa'kin. You're precious life was enough. Tama na, ayaw ko na may mapahamak pang iba dahil sa'kin.

"So you're leaving?"

May narinig akong nag salita sa likod ko. Dali dali kong pinunasan ang mga luha ko at humarap sa nag salita. It was Zane, at parang galit ang expression ng mukha niya. Nasa likod niya ang tatlo.

"I understand that you're angry at me. This is all my fault." sabi ko habang naka tingin lang sa sahig, I can't look at them and I can only see my tears falling to the floor habang nakayuko ako.

"What the hell Cath?! No one is blaming you!" nagulat ako nang sumigaw siya. "Quin is fucking gone and now you?! You're leaving?! What the fuck did we ever do to deserve a pain like this?! We did all that we can to protect and treasure you guys as our friends but now kayo lang din naman pala ang gagago sa'min! Ang daya niyo naman!" his words broke my heart, I can sense the anger and pain in his voice.

"I'm sorry Zane, I'm doing this for you guys. Ever since I came into your lives wala na akong ibang dala kundi perwisyo. Maybe if I pull myself out of the picture them maybe that can make everyone's life easier" nanginginig ang boses ko na sabi, hindi pa din ako maka tingin sa kanila. How can I? After I let them down bigtime.

Nagulat ako ng bigla akong tinulak ni Zane. Agad ako napa upo sa sahig. It hurts pero hindi nako pumalag, he must hate me now. Tama lang na bugbugin niya ako. I deserve to be punished.

Naka upo lang ako sa sahig nag hihintay sa susunod niyang gagawin.

"Ano?! Bakit hindi ka lumaban?! Diba dyan ka magaling?! Where is the Alchemian tough girl?!" He exclaimed gritting his teeth. Hindi pa din ako sumagot, I was just staring at the cold floor sobbing.

"Bro enough." Pinipigilan siya ni Axel. Then I saw...

Tears.

Tears of Zane Monterde was flowing down his cheeks. Tears of a fearsome gangster is being shed for his beloved friends. His friends that are now broken...

Friends with broken souls.

"Cath umalis kana." kalmado ngunit buong buo ang galit sa tinig ni Axel. Tumayo ako mula sa sahig at pinunasan ang mga luha ko.
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"Umalis ka na at sana ang mga landas natin ay hindi na muling mag tagpo pa."