𝙀 𝙏 𝙃 𝘼 𝙉 𝙊 𝙇

idealize

I've been missing you more and more lately
Do you miss me as much?
Everything has been going smoothly
And I don't know if I should be happy or scared
Loving you had been such a ride that I find myself missing it
I still love you and I hope you still love me too, my heart feels like a
Zoo, jumbled emotions embedded in it and it's exhausting dealing with it
Every little moment we've had will forever be in this and I hope we both can look back and realize we're meant to be together

-

It was safe to say basically everyone stopped harassing them and filling up their lockers with unwanted notes. It made Josh feel better having Brendon and Tyler around, Ryan was still a little on edge about it but Josh could tell Ryan was falling head over heels for Brendon all over again. Josh couldn't say anything, though, because he was doing the same for Tyler.

Josh tugged on a sweatshirt (which may or may not be Tyler's) and headed out of his room. Ryan was waiting patiently in the kitchen with the rest of the Dun family and it broke Ryan's heart a little knowing Josh's siblings were being cautious about almost everything but Ryan didn't blame them. Josh fidgeted with the sleeves when he entered the kitchen and reached for his bag that Ryan was holding but the brunet jerked his hand back and said, "I'll be holding this for now until I feel like your arms healed."

Josh didn't fight back because fighting with Ryan was like trying to reason with a stubborn child that will get you nowhere so Josh just smiled and nodded his head. After saying their goodbyes, both boys headed out the door. Ryan had made it clear that he's going to drive them everywhere and, of course, Josh didn't argue back.

"Brendon said Tyler's driving them to school today so we don't have to worry about picking them up," Ryan said once he started the car and backed out the driveway.

Josh nodded, "Ok but we don't have to worry about Brendon for long, though."

Ryan raised a brow but then it clicked, "Oh yeah, graduation is next week isn't it?"

"Yeah, and I have a feeling you're going to miss him." Josh smiled as he side-eyed Ryan who rolled his eyes playfully.

"Yeah yeah but at least there won't be any more gossip and/or stories about him, now that shit was annoying." Ryan sighed out as he pulled into the school parking lot and parked right next to Tyler's car.

Josh couldn't help but smile when Tyler walked over and opened the car door for him, giggling when the brunet extended a hand for him to take. He blushed when Tyler kissed his cheek, "You're in a lovely mood today."

Tyler shrugged and let Josh tangle their fingers together, "I can't help it when I'm with you."

The blush in his cheeks reddened more which lead to Josh covering half his face with his free hand, the sleeves of his hoodie covering up most of his hand, and Tyler cooed seeing the sweater paws. Thankfully Ryan pulled them out of their world just as the first bell rang and all four boys looked at each other with smiles before heading off to class.

-

Lunchtime rolled around and all four decided to chill in the library since Josh didn't feel like being in a crowded area. Of course, Tyler sat down next to Josh and Brendon next to Ryan with the two oldest boys having trays for them to share. Josh overthinks a lot and for some reason today, he started to question if he should forgive Tyler so easily. Ryan had said it was ok but if they never broke up, then Josh wouldn't have gone to the hospital and they wouldn't have been bullied for something they didn't do.

Josh could tell they were trying to gain back his and Ryan's trust but Josh felt like he was moving to fast with Tyler and he didn't want it to end the same way as the first time. Josh could see Ryan tearing down his walls for Brendon but Josh knew he has been torn down the moment Tyler started to show him affection and he could feel himself being put up for tragedy again.

Ryan noticed Josh's quietness and reached over to grab one of his hands, successfully snapping Josh out of his trance and causing the dark-haired boy to blush slightly, "Are you ok?"

Josh could feel Tyler's gaze on him but forced himself to focus on Ryan, "Yeah, I was just..thinking."

"Thinking about what?" Tyler butted in which caused Ryan to glare at him for a split-second and immediately backing out of the conversation.

Ryan rubbed the back of Josh's hand, "Whatever you're thinking, it's wrong. Overthinking isn't going to get you anywhere and if you're overthinking about something, come to me and I'll help, ok?"

Josh nodded and squeezed Ryan's hand which Ryan immediately squeezed back, "Thanks, Ry."

Ryan just smiled in response but kept their hands laced together. Josh didn't know where he'd be if he didn't have Ryan but he's just gratefully he has the brunet in his life.

After that, lunch rolled by smoothly without any other mishaps and the kiss Tyler planted on his forehead made Josh realize that Ryan was right and maybe this second chance will lead to a happier ending.