In Your Eyes ✧ Timothée Chalamet

24 - the volume is astronomical

T I M O T H É E

I feel a sense of déjà vu as Ella gently ices my bruised fist.

We've been here before, in this same situation. However, this time I didn't get beat, because I happened to be doing most of the beating tonight.

Ella was silent the whole way back home. We couldn't drive back in Lola since the two of us were still somewhat drunk. So Aaron had to take a cab to the party and then drive us both back home in my car.

It was honestly embarrassing. I felt like a dumb high schooler again. Like nothing had changed since I graduated. I thought I'd matured these past few months, that maybe I was becoming a better person but the way I lost control tonight proved completely otherwise.

I'm still a dumb kid. College life didn't change that, California didn't change that. Nothing did.

'Does it feel better?' Ella murmurs, and her voice is barely audible yet I still hear her words loud and clear. These are the first words she's spoken to me since Aaron brought us home and I'm grateful because I didn't expect her to speak to me at all tonight.

Especially not after the bomb I dropped on her in the bathroom.

I nod at her and pull my hand away from the ice pack. 'Yeah, it's much better. Thank you.' I state, and I look at her as I speak but she doesn't look back. She keeps her eyes trained on the ice pack and after a long pause she stands up and heads to the kitchen putting the ice pack back into the freezer.

I hear her quiet footsteps heading towards her bedroom but I don't dare look back at her. I might feel like a shitty person right now. I might feel extremely immature, and defeated after the encounter I had with Miles tonight. But I most definitely don't regret what I did. 'He deserved it you know.' I utter and I hear her stop in her tracks. 'I wasn't just being a jealous boyfriend tonight, I was also protecting you.' I claim. 'He knows things.'

'And you think I don't know that already?' She scoffs. 'I know he knows things. I know he's a creep and you have every fucking right to want to protect me from him but that shit was so uncalled for Timmy.' This time I do turn around. I shift on the couch so I'm facing her and the moment I find her eyes she shifts her gaze and stares at the wall behind me instead, completely avoiding my stare.

'What did you expect me to do?' I demand, but she still won't look at me. Her eyes are trained on the same spot in the wall instead of on my own two eyes and it bothers me so much because it reminds me of the last time we were in this same position, when I beat up her father. I clear my throat. 'Was I supposed to let him keep fucking with your head?' I add and this time she crosses her arms over her chest in what looks like agitation.

Her eyes finally find mine, and she's very annoyed with me. As I expected her to be. 'No Timmy. I didn't say that. I didn't say stand there like an idiot and do nothing while he makes a mockery out of me. But I also didn't ask you to hit him in front of all those people.' She says, referring to the events that occurred less then an hour ago. 'It was humiliating.'

'I punched him. Twice.' I state, trying to jog her memory.

Ella shakes her head as if I murdered the kid. 'And he fell down the fucking stairs Timmy!'

'He was fine.' I remind her.

'Yeah. And you're lucky he was fine because if he wasn't you could have gotten yourself into some deep shit.'

At this point I'm pissed off. So I groan angrily and I run my bruised hand through my hair and lean back on the couch so I'm no longer facing her. 'I hate this you know? I hate how I fucking defend you and you get all pissed off at me for no reason.'