Sincerely | k.th.

30. Restitution

Has it really been almost two weeks?

I can't tell anymore and time ceases to exist. I've grown cold in the monotony I've created, numbed to razor sharp tendrils of pain that swiped me with every passing breath. Digging into the pit of my stomach and drumming a searing hurt that nauseated me but vomiting would be too easy to release. Instead, it leaves me to wallow, reminding me of why I dismissed the idea of loving him before.

Loving him...I never got a chance to actually say I love you to him and yet I hear his echo reciting these words in my subconscious, all day, all night, always.

Not only this but his letter that I've branded to memory. Reading it over and over again like some sick, twisted, unrealistic story, waiting for a punchline that never comes.

Just like the dream that I've never awoken from.

Two weeks, really?

Wasn't it just yesterday, he took me sailing or to a romantic dinner by the beach? I could still hear the ocean calling me. The songs of the wind, strumming like the melody of harp being plucked by angels.

The life altering night he told me he was in love with me when his eyes glowed like the stars; gaze reaching as far as Jupiter and even closer to Mars. The ones nestled in the ebony sky could never compare.

He was real, wasn't he? I didn't imagine him, did I? If so, that's one hell of a stretch for an imagination.

Nights were the worst.

After dragging home from work, this is what I do, sit on the couch and gaze out the window, allowing my thoughts to reminisce on my past, torture my present and tease my future. Hearing the rain on this particular night, serving as background music to my memories while I seek restitution of happier times known before.

I miss my friend. I miss the way we were.

There was always a thought that he was hiding something. I know that he's had a small dalliance with his family affairs but he told me that he was never interested. He wanted to travel and live carefree away from them but they hindered him.

Now I see why. Those plans would interfere with the life and wife that awaited him.

"What about your girlfriend? Shouldn't you want to share that and all of this with her? I know you aren't single, Taehyung. You never are."

"I don't have a girlfriend. I'm not seeing anyone and I haven't for quite sometime Kye."

I guess it wasn't a total lie. He wasn't seeing anyone other than his fiancée he claimed not to love.

On second thought, she was bugging me just as much.

She never spoke.

She didn't react when he introduced us.

There was no jealous fit. No whine about him being hers and screaming to her lungs asking who the hell was I?

She just stared and appeared to be just as sad as I was.

Did she feel the same as him? Was she being taken from someone she loved as well?

I don't know what breaks my heart more, Taehyung lying to me or both of them having to live a lie with each other.

My phone jolted me from my thoughts. It was Levi. I've been avoiding his call and he's been granting me space but I know he's worried. I decided to answer.

"Hello?"

"Kye?"

"Yes Lee."

He sighed. "Finally! What the hell sis? I was about to book a flight over to you if didn't answer."

"Save your money Levi. Washington isn't a hop, skip and a jump." I mumbled.

"How are you?"

I absolutely despise the rhetoric of that question. I didn't answer. I'm sure my silence would tell him what he needed to know.

Levi sighed again. "You want me to kick his ass?"

I cut my stare over to the window. "No. I think he's been beaten up enough already."

"It sucks Kye. I mean...well... you know what I mean."

Levi made me grin a little. He's not the best with emotion, especially with me but he means well and I appreciate him.

"I could fly Kyra over so you to could have some girl time and she could give me a break." Levi suggested.

"You're just going to hand off your wife, huh? Besides, she doesn't need to be company to my misery. I rather suffer alone."

"You don't have to suffer Kye. I mean, I don't know how but you like this guy, right? So just...I don't know, move to Korea and be his mistress or something." Levi scoffed.

I shook my head. "That's not funny Levi. Why would you even suggest that?"

"Why not? It's not a real marriage. It's a business arrangement Kye. You think she won't have any stick on the side?"

As much as I dislike my brother's stabs at the truth, the idea of Euna probably not being in love with Taehyung is really pegging me more than ever.

"No! It doesn't matter if he's not in love her or she with him. They will still be married and I respect the union. It's not my place to interrupt."

Levi released a heavy sigh. "Well, it still sucks."

"You've made that known quite a few times dear brother."

"Because it does. And I told you he was rich. I could have been off about the mafia and drug cartel but let's not rule anything out yet."

I could hear Levi's smirk.

"Lee, please. Taehyung is not involved in criminal activity. His family money is legit, that I do know."

"Well, how legit can it be if they had to pawn off his son for it?" Levi scoffed.

"I can't argue there."

A loud knock to my door drew my attention from the window. I checked the time wondering who could be visiting me at this hour, not that it was late but I don't have company often.

Another knock commenced, more rapid than the first.

"Lee, can I call you back?"

"Sure sis. Rest, okay?"

"I will. I love you."

Ending the call, I gripped my phone tight to my hand as I eased from the couch. My heart thudded like a fist pounding away to a punching bag, slow but steady. The creaking of the floor beneath my feet rattled into play with the millions of emotions resonating inside me.

I had no idea who this could be and there were only a few people who knew where I lived besides my usual deliveries. The last time there was a knock like this, I was being swept off to Hawaii. Maybe this time it will be my ticket to hell to end this suffering.

Gulping I peeped through the ocular in the center of my door. Lips parted and eyes fluttered when I recognized almost on instant the body that stood behind it. Trembling, I opened the door, face buckled in confusion and wonder, maybe a hint of fright, however, there was one word that came to mind as we stared at one another:

Restitution.

I must still be dreaming.

"Hello Kye. May I come in?"

♥️♥️♥️

Cupid 💘