J.WINTOUR || 박지민 || BangtanBoys || Royal Series || AU ⚜ [EDITING]

Casual ◇

•JM•

For two days our relationship was nothing but smooth sailing. I never imposed anything more than a kiss on her cheek and simple hugs.

When we talked that night I found out she got back here in the manor, she clarified that she broke up with me and she's only here to fulfill her part of the bargain.

Of course I got sad.

Yet, I never gave up.

"Are we still friends?"

I asked her in such a sullen manner.

She smiled;

"Of course..."

I held her hand...

"Can I try again?..."

Her smile faded but she allowed me a moment to explain myself. I held the tears because this begging might end up with laughs instead of her taking me seriously.

Like what she said, I look ugly when I cry so...

But I was really emotional deep inside. I realized how much I love her and wanted to be with her.

For the first time in my life, I felt this kind of fear.

The fear of losing someone...

"Can I try being part of your life again?..."

I swallowed hard. She smiled.

"Whether I like it or not, you are part of my life, oppa. I will be forever thankful-"

"No! No...no Martina, not just like that. Be part of your life again as your man... as someone you love on top of everything..."

She looked away.

"I know I really messed up but please give me a chance. I can't go on like this. What we have now is tormenting me. I love you and I won't stop until you're mine again."

She heaved a deep sigh and gently squeezed my hand.

"But how can I trust you when you can't even tell me everything?... I feel like you don't find me as someone you can easily confide your troubles with. I don't like keeping secrets. I don't like lies..."