𝗿𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀; nct dream

sixteen

Chapter 16: Secrets Between Us

"Mark, you know that this is getting too far out of hand, right?" The lady across from him asked. Her tone was kind and comforting, but it was harsh enough to make Mark think.

He wanted to get better, he truly did, but it was so hard. Everyone told him to 'just eat' or to 'stop being dramatic' but he couldn't help it. He had tried, he really had, and that's exactly what landed him here.

"I know. But I don't know how."
He kept his head low while he crossed his ankles and his fingers fiddled with each other with anxiety.

"That's okay, sweetie, that's why I'm here, okay?" She kindly asked before jotting down some things into the notebook.

A small spell of silence between them was enough to clear Mark's busy mind and let him breathe for a moment.

"What do you think will help me quicker?" He whispered, still slightly on edge and seriously desperate to get back to his boyfriend.

"Well, Mark, we'll go through a few things to try and get you on the right road, but the main thing is that you want it. Without the mindset, there is no way you'll make a comeback." Mark nodded sadly, knowing her words were true.

He found himself looking away from his hands and up to the woman's sympathetic gaze.

"Well, Mark, there isn't much I can do for you today because I have to get the 'okay' from the higher-ups. But I'm hoping that if you come back at this time tomorrow, we'll have a good look at your schedular and other things to help, okay?" She leaned in, hands wrapping around Mark's  in a comforting way. "I know this isn't easy, but you're a strong one, Mark. You'll get there."

Mark nodded again, not trusting his voice to stay strong for him.

"I'll see you tomorrow then."

With that, the session was over. Mark stood up again, trailing towards the door in a dejected manner. How long would he be here for? He had to get out, and he didn't care who joined him.

He was ready to leave...He had to leave.

° ° ° °

"Look, Jun, I really think you should tell the others," Jaemin pleaded as he sat on his friend's bed, listening to Renjun's laboured breaths from behind the locked bathroom door.

"I won't, Jaem. And neither will you!" He called out, trying to calm his breathing as the therapist had told him.

It was just too hard though. He felt a swirl of emotions, yet the only one he could express at that moment was anger, hence he was locked in the bathroom.

His hands instinctively went to his arms, subconsciously scratching the surface of his wrists.

The small beads of blood calmed him as he heard Jaemin's distant hum of disapproval.

"But they should know about how you've been feeling."

To no avail, Renjun refused to share his inner thoughts, having been taught to be the leader.

"No, Jaemin, and if you breathe a word, there will be consequences!"

Jaemin merely bit his lip, his inner voice telling him he should help his friend and tell Mark or Jeno about the second eldest, yet he knew he was a good friend, and a good friend would never stab the other in the back.

"Fine, Junnie. But only if you keep me updated with how you're doing," he warned, his heart thumping loudly as he thought of the older boy in pain.

A small grunt fell from Renjun's lips as he took what he was given.

"Thanks, Jaem. You won't regret it!" He called out, from behind the door. He continued to calm his breathing, hoping that the therapist's sessions would finally do some good.

"I better not."