Lỗi - Error 404 - ENGLISH TRANSLATION - Plaaastic

Part 21

Travelling to me is easy. It's similar to you lifting one leg and then another, just like that. One, two, one, two, if you already went throught step one you can go through step two and like that you can walk forever. Whatever destination i go to i still wear my princess dresses, 10 inch platforms then just add a backpack for travelling. I don't understand people who tell me that travelling is their passion only for them to go and hide into a five star hotel and then going for shopping at H&M, Topshop, then whenever they would go to it would be the same, what are they going for? If the purpose is to kill time and spend money then i won't say anything, but if you call this travelling then it's not right. I also don't understand the youngsters who call themselves a tourist, when in reality they just go and sit on their motorbikes going fast on the highway, spending money that they got from their parents and then going home to write all kind of reviews, taking photos with DSLR and then uploading on Facebook, wearing military clothes, putting a vietnamese flag somewhere far away and have to look good on every photo. If you go, just go, don't talk, don't talk nonsenses, going not for showing of, not for checking-in, going so when you come home it would feel different. Going is one, two, one, two. Going is moving.

Just like that, every month going to different place for six years straight. I made code web from a sleeping bag outside, fished for wifi from coffee shops nearby. I wore feathered Moschino jacket through the desert. Writting on blog at countless bus stations, train stations, airports. Putting on Chanel perfume because i didn't showered for a few days.

I went one, two, one, two.

One of my travel destinations that i miss the most is Nepal. When i was in South Korea, i shared a couchsurfing place with a guy from Kazakhstan. I didn't know where should i go next, and that time period was my one of the most haunting periods. Suddenly i got scared of cities, of the sparkling lights, of people and going to Korea made things worse. And the guy said to me, why won't you go to Nepal? Truthfully it has nothing so you won't have any expectations to lose, i was there living at the foster house, one family of three taking care of thirteen foster childs. You go there, help them with a little bit of money to go to school, to build a house. Because i had no idea as to where i want to go, so going anywhere would be the same to me, i thought. I accepted the words, took the address of that family and went to fashion events next month to earn money to go to mountains.

Seeing the house in Nepal i was speechless. It really had nothing. Barely having electricity. Every meal the kids would have a portion of rice that was smaller than their fists without any side dishes. They would inhale it all at once and then sitting there licking their fingers for the rest of time, probably like a dessert. Girls and boys wearing identical clothes, toilet was there but it could only be flushed once every few days to save money.

I brought some DVDs for the kids, the first day i played a DVD with magic, they said that they wanted to become a magician; on second day i played a DVD with dancing, they said they wanted to become a dancer. One of the family members cried thanking me, before i came they had no dreams at all.

Not having any choice but not knowing that they don't have any choice, the kids lived leisurely and peacefuly. Every week on Sunday waiting for sun to hide a little bit they would go take water from a well to take a bath.

Until one beautiful day about three weeks later after i've arrived i couldn't stand it anymore and decided to go down the mountain, to the place with tourists and wifi. Suddenly saw a KFC without anyone in there and bought two buckets of fried chicken, the kids seeing me from faraway carrying the buckets, tears coming from their eyes, saying that they never even had one chicken thigh in their live. I said „Then make sure to eat two of them".

After those days i thought that i understood misfortune but that wasn't right.

And then i don't know the reason i decided that i would climb the Annapurna mountain. Thinking it's summer, even if it's cold like winter in Viet Nam then it still couldn't be worse than that. So i went for a climb, giving myself three days to climb up and down.Until i didn't met a storm in the middle of summer.

Backpack being torn at the middle of the mountain while climbing i lost all the things that i had with me. Wearing a thin long sleeved shirt, i went with a lead guy that i rented, and then i got a cold fever making my body temperature twice as hot, becoming all red and feeling like i was as thin as water. We found a tea house to rest our feets, going in nobody was inside, without any drinks or food. I was just lying there from morning to night, my body unconscious and i couldn't move at all. The sun was about to go out and i went out, when a lead guy approached me and started touching me. Surprised, weak, i didn't know what to do, i was lucky to run inside and lock the door. That door was trying to open all night, i was hiding at the corner of the bed thinking that this time i'm going to die with my body dissapearing for sure. But i was so weak that i still passed out and the next morning after i woke i was alone, the lead guy gone without any trace.

Lying there for one more day, phone without signal without any food and water with no way to escape the situation i almost went crazy. I imagined in my head scenarios for how long it will take my friends and family to find my body or if i will be here forever until someone unlucky won't come in and find me. Alone i wanted to cry but my body had no water to create any tears anymore.

Luckily, weirdly too lucky for my life, i don't even know after how many days there was a guy that was travelling who also decided to go rest in this tea house. He gave me water and told me that he run out of his food too but he had some rice wine and a joint, just drink and smoke and then we will go down together.

Going up took me three days and going down half day. Arriving to the foot of mountain i fainted and had to be rushed to hospital and be on IV drips for one week until i could be considered normal again. Is this luck or bad luck?

But even after this event i still walked. Still one step, two step, not stopping. One, two, one, two.

I still walked. The first time, new place, new people, i felt like i always exhaled whenever the plane took off from Singapore. And then what the hell, the sadness turned cold, i catched the cold and then it kept eating more and more, into my lungs, no cure for it. Now even if i exhaled it would hurt.

From having fun in France to relaxing in Indonesia to sorrow in Philippines, finding the happiness again in Japan, not caring about anything in Laos turned into being bored in America, being sad in Cambodia, being lonely in Myanmar and still wanting to die in Taiwan.

No matter how many places i've been to, how many places i'll go to i am still like a mouse trapped in a glass cage; and once it's like that, wherever it goes it's still inside a cage. But i don't even know if i'm that cage or that mouse anymore. Being imprisoned in my own form with no way to escape besides waiting until that cage goes down. Everybody being outside, destroying, shouting, calling for me, i know already i know that but it's like every sound have been turned off. Glasses being soundproof, no matter how much i wanted to i just couldn't hear what everyone said, what did i have to do, i could only accept to be embraced by irritation out of my loneliness.Irritated, irritated until i went crazy.Tuan Jun said: „Maybe you were a computer in your previous life."I ran, i hide, but i played hide and seek with myself and ran away from my own shadow so before i could even recognize it it already catched me anyway. \