Painful Pleasure (COMPLETED) √

Chapter 22: Princess

Chapter 22: Princess

"IT WAS YOUR FAULT why your mother was shot! I told you! I told you not to go out because it's too dangerous for you! Look what have you done, Iria!" malakas na angil sa akin ni daddy nang mapag-isa kami sa study room niya sa loob ng mansyon.

"I-I'm so sorry, dad. I'm really sorry," Humuhikbi kong hingi ng paumanhin sa kanya.

I know I was at fault but I was so bored inside this house. It suffocates me to the point that I want to get away from here. I only want to shop with mom. What's wrong with that? I want to have an alone time with her. And I didn't know that this will happen. That this will make me lose my only anchor, my mother.

"Do you think your sorry will bring your mom's life back? You ungrateful child!" Huli niyang ani bago ako iniwang mag-isa sa kanyang study room na puno ng pagsisisi at sakit ang nasa puso ko.

"Hey. You okay, honey?" Nabalik lang ako sa sarili ko nang marinig ang nag-aalalang tinig ni Reece sa gilid ko.

I smiled at him to assure him that I am really okay. That he doesn't need to worry about me.

"You sure? Kanina ka pa na wala sa sarili," he tucked some strands of my hair behind my ears and he softly caressed my cheeks. "You already tired? Gusto mo nang umuwi tayo?"

Umiling ako sa huling tanong nito. The party just only got started and it is rude to go when in fact, we don't have anything to do in home. Do we?

"Wala, Reece. I'm fine, okay? Don't worry." Pag-a-assure ko sa kanya para hindi na ito mag-alala pa sa akin.

He stared at me for I don't know how many minutes until he signed and divert his attention in the small stage in front. Kinagat ko ang labi ko at yumuko para itago ang namumuong luha sa aking magkabilang mata dahil sa naalalang hindi ko na dapat pang balikan.

I know it was my fault why mom got shot and died on arrival. And I can't forgive myself for that for a lifetime. If it weren't because of me, mom will be alive until now. If it weren't because of me, my daddy will not be in vain. And if it weren't because of me, I won't be like this. I won't be someone's concubine. I won't be someone's bed warmer every night. And my dad won't resent me. But I know that I can't bring back time and I can't make my mistakes right. Though, I know something will happen in my life that I will always treasure the most. To meet the man that I will love for the rest of my life.

Tumayo ako mula sa pagkaka-upo dahilan nang pagtingala ni Reece sa akin na may nagtatanong na mga mata.

"Comfort room," tipid kong paalam sa kanya at akma sana itong tatayo nang pigilan ko ito. "I can manage. Dito ka lang."

Hindi ko na hinintay pa ang sagot nito at naglakad na ako papunta sa comfort room ng venue. Nang makapasok, I looked at my face at the vanity mirror and saw my eyes were light red due to the unshed tears in it. Kagat-kagat ang labi ay tumingala ako para mas lalong mapigilan ang sarili na umiyak sa sakit at pagsisisi na matagal ko ng kinikimkim.

The pain that I feel today, is the strength that I will feel tomorrow. But, will I make it my strength when it is hunting me until now? Will it be enough strength to make me forget everything about it? Does it give me justice in everything I have done to overcome it?

No.

Nothing can give justice to it until I die, even if I forgive myself. Pero hindi ko alam kung kailan o mapapatawad ko pa nga ba ang sarili ko sa nangyari noon.

Umayos ako ng tayo at inayos ko ang sarili ko nang marinig ko ang pagbukas sara ng pintuan ng banyo. I wiped the unshed tears and put some powder in my cheeks for a retouched.