Pannacotta Fugo x Reader One-shots

[44] softcore.

Dear my lovely readers and fellow writers, how are you?
This is MatoMasaharu. My plan was to come back here next week but I changed it. So, here I am with a new chapter and a little something.

First, regarding this chapter, I made it on #WorldSuicidePreventionDay which was two days ago. My work includes lots of self-harm and suicidal thought, suicide attempts, or just suicide in general, including this one. No, I'm not encouraging anyone to do it. But why I add those elements to my work? Because I'm one of those people who struggle and those things are so close to my everyday lives. Now, I know some of you (I hope I don't have to say this but reality sucks) feel the same. Remember that your feelings matter and valid. You deserve better and everything shall be alright as you're not alone. My inbox, Instagram DM, and even the comment sections are always open for you if you need or want someone to listen. The least thing I can do for you is to help you vent it all out. 

Secondly, I'm opening a polling in next chapter.

I think that's all. Please enjoy this chapter I specifically enjoyed writing.
(Btw, I'm glad this is a FugoxReader book and not MistaxReader. I mean, look at the number on this chapter.)

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Rustling leaves floating in the air as they keep falling from the trees. Windows wide open and transparent curtains flutter. Skies blue and orange by the horizon with no clouds to be seen. Once in a while, the cold breezes would come by. The time keeps ticking while the silence stirring stills. One would describe the situation to be peaceful, the tranquility of autumn. That wouldn't be wrong, yet couldn't be right either. Beneath it lies raw emotions left unspoken, and a question begging to be answered.

"Some days I'm a warm cup of tea, the other nights I'm only the empty cup." The words finally escaped [y/n]'s lips as an answer, as well as the beginning of her story. "I poured all my might on others while I ache alone is my misery. I never taste the emotion I possess as I never have the time for myself. It got me hole on my chest, hollow, leaving me breathless for as long as I could remember."

Fugo sucked in a deep breath with frowning brows as he tries to keep himself composed. Hands stayed on his lap, clenched, trembling with rage. The gaze of his eyes went low to the edge of the bed. They were shaking. Deep down he wanted to scream, he wouldn't dare. He couldn't. For the first time since long ago, he wants to keep quiet.

"Don't make such difficult face, Panna," she interrupted his thought. [y/n] reached out to his hand, resting hers gently on one of his. When their eyes met again, she continued. "It was inevitable. This is who I am, yes, only a fragile human being. No one to be blamed but me, myself, and I."

"[y/n], please, don't say such things." Broken, falling apart, the deepest voice of him came out dry. On the contrary, tears quick to fill his eyes, streaming down like a river in the rainy season. "I could've done better. I should've noticed. When we were together, where were you actually? Was I not present? Why are you so quiet?"

"Panna," choked on her throat, [y/n] had to cry as she couldn't bear the emotions soaring inside her chest. "You never cried before, why now? Think again, it would be only logical to blame me. I did it for myself. You were always there for me. I never deserve you in the first place. We are the opposite of each other."

"And who to decide that?" Fugo growled angrily. Eyes were red when he lifted his face to look directly at hers. He grabbed her hand, clasping it with his, tightly holding it with no plan to let go. "There would be no logic in this matter, [y/n]. As the opposite, the much different of a person we are, I find you to be the only one I want. How naive of me for not saying anything up until now. For this to happen first infuriates me."

The statements caught [y/n] off guard. Nowhere she could find any hesitation from him. As clear as crystal could be that was. Just like his eyes in the moment of slow-motion despite the darkness that the skies start to offer. While Fugo noticing her confusion, skepticism, he pulled her into his arms. Leaving her speechless, breathless.

"There would be nothing left of me if you leave." Sad, being desperate, Fugo stated. There they began to lamenting again.

"Tell me this is not a dream," [y/n] said amid her hiccups. She had wrapped her hands around Fugo out of sadness and happiness raging together. And frustration.

"That was only a nightmare. You've been through all that and now everything would be alright. I won't let it happen again. Heaven or hell, they have my words."

"I'm so ashamed of myself, Panna. This shouldn't have happened if only.., if only I'm not an egoist. I was blinded. And you, oh dear, you've been here since forever."

"Let's blame no one and move forward. Let's forgive ourselves and start a new line. Wouldn't that the best decision we could take?"

[y/n] let go of the embrace, no more tears left for the day. The sun has gone to the West as the world keeps rotating away. It was dark for sure and they could only see each other because of the dim light from outside the window. Should that be sufficient for them as they won't bother. 

"Look at you, never I imagine I would see you like this." Fugo cupped her slightly rosy cheeks, wiping away the remaining tears. Puffy reddened eyes, pale lips, he tucked away her disheveled hair. He smiled, heartbreakingly happy.

"How do I look?"

"Beautiful."

"I wouldn't believe you," [y/n] chuckled, returning the smile.

"I'm telling you the truth," Fugo replied quietly. He pressed his forehead on hers, eyes to eyes, noses touching. "Because you're here with me. You're alive."

"I'm happy." [y/n] closed her eyes.

"Me too," Fugo said, leaning for more.