LOVING FROM AFAR...

CHAPTER 37 GABRIEL

GABRIEL POV

Alam ko na alam niya. Peru pilit pa rin niyang pinapakita sa akin na ok lang lahat na hindi siya nagdududa. Bakit nga ba ayaw kong sabihin?Takot ako..takot ako na baka masaktan ko siya at takot na baka isipin niyang iiwan ko siya dahil kahit kailan hindi ko gagawin yon. I hate myself for not being truthful to her..she deserve it..she deserves the truth. But how? Damn it!

I can sense the awkwardness and the coldness of the atmosphere. She keep on smiling trying to let me feel she's okay and I want to punch myself for making her feel that way. I pull her closer and peek a kiss in her cheeks. I saw she close her eyes with a deep breath.

"don't stress yourself.."

I whisper not letting her go. She move and pull away in my hold smiling.

"Why would I? Is there something I should stress about?"

her sarcasm hit again.

"I love you...always remember that..."

sabi kong diretsong nakatingin sa mata niya. Umiwas siya ng tingin biting her lips.

"you sound like your saying goodbye.."

bigla niyang sabi na pilit pinagmumukha sa aking okay lang siya. Stupid Gab! You hurting her again!

"don't.... don't you ever ever think of me leaving you...it's not going to happened.."

pilit kong pinaiintindi sa kanya na hindi ko siya iiwan at hindi sumagi sa isip ko na iwan siya. She healed me in many ways. She build me again..she make all my doubts gone  She save me and I love her..I love her to death.

Nagbuntong hininga siyang tumango at hinawakan ang kamay niya.

"I believed you... I always will.."

parang paos niyang sabi. Her eyes is full of emotions and I can't read what her feeling is.

Ilang minuto pa kaming nanatili sa sasakyan bago siya bumaba.  I lean forward to kiss her quick and at last she smiled genuinely and walk towards their door.

Agad na rin akong umalis para makapag isip. Para makapaghanda kung paano ko sasabihin sa kanya na hindi ikakasama ng loob niya.

I go back to the condo and let my mind sink again. Hindi ko rin naiintindihan kung bakit ganito anf reaksyon ko. Dahil ba ngayon ko lang ulit siya makikita o dahil baka mamahalin ko siya ulit? Hindi..dahil alam ko Kath own my heart and nobody can take her out of it..not even Ashley.

Theres a knock on the door so I force my feet to move and open it. Sino pa nga ba..Gary, Sean and Mark.

"woaahhh!! What with that face bro?"

Sean said pushing me away from the doorway.

"Is it Ashley right?"

Gary added. Mark turn to me intensely staring.

"Cmon bro...relax..di ba sabi mo mahal mo si Gab?Anu pa pinag aalala mo?"

Sean said again. Naupo kami sa sala sabay paandar nila ng video game.

"Hindi mo pa nasabi?"

Mark ask. I nod. He shake his head and tap me on the shoulder.

"wag mo ng hintayin na siya ang makakaalam..bro pati ako madadamay..ang daming alibi na ang nasasabi ko kay Tricia.."

"alam ko...sasabihin ko na naman..."

"kailan pa?"

"bukas...baka.."