Not For Show

Chapter 37 - " He's become her favorite person"

Nathan's smile is what saves me from my anxiety. I've been anxious all day for no reason other than the wedding. Because seeing him smile calm me entirely.

I take my first sip from my champagne watching Nathan greet friends coming into our rehearsal dinner. 

I wish everyone would just arrive at the same time, that way maybe I would have to stand my the door greeting all of them like the wedding planner planned. I want to go laugh and eat, and enjoy my own party. Maybe she saving all of that for tomorrow.

Maybe it's because I'm still waiting for Roy to arrive that I've been able to endure it so far. I keep looking for her beautiful blonde hair to come out through the crowd.

But it's Lia's blonde hair that I see instead. I'm glad Zayn was able to convince her to come. I want to have her around. She makes Zayn happier than he's been in years. Having her around means that Roy will get to have more time with her brother. Having her around me gives me a sense of peace not everything we went through has now passed. Those hurt feelings that lingered between us for years is now gone

Louis arrives not long after with Stella by his side. I offer them champagne as a waiter walks by and Louis gladly takes a glass. Yet Stella declines, something she's never done before. I glance between them as I begin to squint my eyes. Louis shushes me as Stella lets out a giggle. I promise them to keep their secret as long as they promise to keep Zayn and Harry away from each other. They gladly agree.

I look behind me to see my friends on the other side of the party. Not much mixing which makes me feel like it's unbalanced.

It isn't like how I had always imagined. I dreamed of everyone coming together so naturally. Like they had already known each other. Maybe because in my dream, Harry was the one beside me instead. We had the same friends and circle.

" Hey"

I look up to see Nathan grinning down at me.

" You okay?" he asks.

" Yeah" I smile with my tongue against my front teeth almost sticking my tongue at him.

Nathan pull me into him and presses his lips against my forehead. He knows I'm anxious. Maybe he is too, even if it's only a little.

The short red curly hair catches my attention behind some of Nathan's friends. I quickly excuse myself before running passed them. Within a couple of feet away, her eyes are already on me. 

" Cailin" Cheryl smiles before I wrap my arms around her.

Her hug her comforting and warm, one that I've grown to love and charish so much. One that I wish my own mother and I still had.  Cheryl gives me one more tight squeeze before letting me go.

" You look so beautiful" she says running her fingers towards the edges of my hair.

" Thank you" I tilt my head with tears threatening to form.

" Are you happy?" she asks.

We've talked about this day so much, yet I never expected her to ask me this question today.

" Of course" my smile widens at her.

She reaches over and gives me a kiss on the cheek. I point over to Louis and Stella making sure she knows where her table is. Before I can excuse myself from Nathan and follow Cheryl, I see the blonde hair I've been looking for this entire time.

Roy walks in holding Harry's hand. Her smile is almost bright enough for me not to see Jess walking in right behind them with Kian holding her hand. It was Jess' idea to have the kids get ready at her place, which obviously meant having Harry there as well.